My wife and I are planning on trying to have our first child soon; however, due to medical reasons, she has been using Nuvaring (a form of birth control) and she will stop taking it once we are ready to start trying. Due to the after affects of hormones, the doctor recommended us to use condoms to prevent pregnancy for one month. If she was to get pregnant during that first month after stopping birth control, it could cause numerous birth defects. My question is, how should we prevent pregnancy during that first month without sinning? Is it okay to temporarily use condoms in order to prevent having a child with birth defects?
No. Abstain from sex for the one month, rather than using condoms.
I would suggest abstinence. As condoms aren’t allowed by Church teaching. In short, sex and birth control don’t have any place together in Catholic teaching. Natural Family Planning is allowable.
While we are not permitted to give medical advice, the doctor seems very negligent as condoms are far from 100%.
I would suggest you get to a NaPro doctor and discuss with them. Even if you have to drive several hours.
This report actually does a poor job of highlighting why NaPro as, in my opinion, the best part about it is that unlike most OBGYN the NaPro doctors are actually on the forefront of reproductive health technology on a propriter level whereas most OBGYN are not.
Post an article then…
By abstaining from sex.
I have suggested abstinence to my wife, but she does not agree unfortunately. She is Protestant and believes using condoms are acceptable. I attempted to explain the Church’s stance on condoms, but I do not think I did a very good job. Any advice on that one?
Try to re-explain it.
If all else fails, marriage is a 2-way street. She needs to respect your wishes/religion.
A month without sex shouldnt be that bad, hopefully
You two should sit down with a great Priest. Perhaps he could explain everything. Like @Maximilian75 said, she should respect your religion too. After all, there’s gonna be times where one of you won’t be in good health and abstinence will be a reality.
Thank you for this link. I read some of it already, and I plan to finish it once I get off work tonight. The little bit I had time to read was informative.
Does anyone know the name of the letter written about why contraceptive is not acceptable? I know there was one written back in the 1980’s and it is supposed to be informative.
Thank you @Cruciferi!
Honestly, this is NOT about the church’s stance. Condoms are not life-and-death safe. Perfect use is 98%. Perfect use. Many statisticians put human error adding an additional 3%-19% chance of pregnancy.
In your case, it would be a terrifying proposition.
Yes, you cannot contracept.
“Honey i appreciate that you see things differently than I do, but I cannot in good conscience do what you’re asking me to do. I won’t violate my conscience.”
If she uses a female barrier method you should talk to your pastor for guidance. You may be able to have relations if you are not comtracpeting in any way and merely passive in that regard.
The nuvaring if it’s main purpose is birth control is likely sinful as well. So, you see, sin just leads to more sin, as in here.
Your wife can’t force you to have sex. I hope she agrees to respect your religious beliefs. Obviously we are not doctors or allowed to give medical advice. Speak to a Catholic doctor.
Her Nuvaring is for medical reasons. I have talked to my priest about that already. He said that it is acceptable as long as it is for medicinal purposes.
Yes, he is 100% correct.
That said, what the dr is suggesting–as I’ve stated–seems to me to be medically negligent. You need to work with a doctor who actually takes the life of your potential unborn child seriously. If this was a case of your wife dying if she got pregnant, would you really want a doctor that suggested a method that had a “statistical” 98% success rate and a user reported rate between 80%-90%?