Effective confession

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I haven’t been to confession for nearly 10 years and would be really uncertain of what to do and say. Also I don’t know if I could possibly remember every sin over the last 10 years. There have also been many things that I jost don’t know whether they were sins at all. Dare I ever go back? :o
 
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Linnyo:
I haven’t been to confession for nearly 10 years and would be really uncertain of what to do and say. Also I don’t know if I could possibly remember every sin over the last 10 years. There have also been many things that I jost don’t know whether they were sins at all. Dare I ever go back? :o
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YES!!! First make an examination of your conscience, ask the Holy Spirit to help you examine your life and your sin using the 10 commandments as your guide. Get to a priest, tell him it’s been a long time and he will be more than happy to help you make a good confession.

I just made my first confession after over 40 years. It was an amazing experience of grace, the priest was very kind, very helpful in my examination, and no, I didn’t have to recount the number of times I committed certain sins, just acknowledging that these were sins committed, some with frequency, and being truly repentant (which means turning from those sins as well as being sorry for them).

Don’t be afraid!!! You will be so blessed if you go!

God Bless,
Jeanette
 
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Linnyo:
I haven’t been to confession for nearly 10 years and would be really uncertain of what to do and say. Also I don’t know if I could possibly remember every sin over the last 10 years. There have also been many things that I jost don’t know whether they were sins at all. Dare I ever go back? :o
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I got you beat - I have not been in 26 years :eek: …I am really looking forward to the answers you get - great question! 👍
Anne
 
Yes, you go back. Absolutely.

It has been 8 years when I went back and probably 15 since I’d given a complete confession. I definitely recommend it. The priest was kind and didn’t act shocked. The feeling of grace was just awesome. I know I floated on air for a couple of days.

One site that was helpful to me was www.frpat.com - he has a page on reconciliation which includes links to an examination of conscience and a confession cheat sheet (what to say). Closely related to that was www.cmonback.com It was reassuring to me to know that I wasn’t the only one in the same boat.

Let us know how it goes.
 
Another suggestion is to call and make an appointment, since it might take awhile. Tell the priest on the phone you want to make a general confession after being absent for a number of years.

My husband would say go to a stranger, but I say go with someone you are at least familiar with. I went to a stranger last year beccause the parish was close and had confessions on Holy Saturday. The priest practically yelled at me. I know that would not have happened with the priests at my parish, because I have confessed to two of them and the third I have heard is very gentle. My experience led to a bad confession. I didn’t want to go on!
 
After having been away from confession for many years, no preparation will allow you to remember every sin. The church realizes this and if you make a sincere effort, all the sins that you could not remember are forgiven. Fr. Corapi warns about people who confess and then think that they remember something and don’t think they confessed it. He says that this scrupulousity can lead to much temptation by the devil to discourage you and give you false guilt. Give it your best-the slate is clean. God gives you a new spiritual beginning.

Good luck to all those who are considering returning to this Sacrament. Remember the Prodigal Son and how happy the father was to have him back.

Deacon Tony
 
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plato3:
After having been away from confession for many years, no preparation will allow you to remember every sin. The church realizes this and if you make a sincere effort, all the sins that you could not remember are forgiven. Fr. Corapi warns about people who confess and then think that they remember something and don’t think they confessed it. He says that this scrupulousity can lead to much temptation by the devil to discourage you and give you false guilt. Give it your best-the slate is clean. God gives you a new spiritual beginning.
Deacon Tony
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Thanks for the encouraging words, but in my case after the priest was kind of angry with me he did ask if there was anything else. And I told him no even though there was something. So it wasn’t that I forgot. I’ve been to confession several times since and haven’t said anything, so now I know I have sacrilege to confess, which let me tell you may be harder to deal with than anything else!
 
DVina,I am sorry to hear that the priest seemed angry. I guess we are spoiled in our diocese because the priests are most kind in Confession and I belive most are. If there is another place where you can go to confess, if might help. You are under no obligation to confess in your own parish. There are many nice retreat houses that have confessions. Remember everything was forgiven except for that “Something” so you are not starting over. I am sure there are others who have had your difficulty and did just fine when they finally confessed and got the load off their shoulders. Holy week is coming, then Easter. There has to be a Good Friday before Easter.

May God give you strength,
Deacon Tony
 
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DVina:
Thanks for the encouraging words, but in my case after the priest was kind of angry with me he did ask if there was anything else. And I told him no even though there was something. So it wasn’t that I forgot. I’ve been to confession several times since and haven’t said anything, so now I know I have sacrilege to confess, which let me tell you may be harder to deal with than anything else!
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What you have to remember is that Christ was present in that Confessional with you, and He is aware of the hurt that you experienced there. I’m afraid your priest will probably be more accountable than you, although I am not God. But, Christ is Mercy, remember that.

Go to confession, get it off your chest, and remember, Christ knows your heart! He loves you!

Grace to you,
Jeanette
 
Jeanette L:
What you have to remember is that Christ was present in that Confessional with you, and He is aware of the hurt that you experienced there. I’m afraid your priest will probably be more accountable than you, although I am not God. But, Christ is Mercy, remember that.

Go to confession, get it off your chest, and remember, Christ knows your heart! He loves you!

Grace to you,
Jeanette
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Thanks, I know it, I really do:) .

Sometimes I have to hear it a number of times, Fr. said it in his homily on EWTN this a.m. too.

We’re scheduled for confession Saturday with the 4 kids of age and it’s also our anniversary.
 
Yahoooooo!
I went to confession yesterday and it was GREAT! My priest was so gentle and guided me carefully when I needed a little help. I thought after 26 years it would be next to impossible to make a good confession - boy was I wrong. Now I have the courage and the drive to take care of my needed annulment and to have my current marriage blessed by the church. 👍
Anne
 
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plato3:
Remember everything was forgiven except for that “Something” so you are not starting over.
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Actually, when you deliberately leave something out, the entire confession is invalid. When you do go back, DVina, be sure to mention all the other mortal sins from the bad confession.

God is waiting for you with infinite mercy. He loves to forgive. The worst sins are like a drop of water in the ocean when compared to His mercy. Don’t be afraid! Find another priest and go for it! I’m praying for you.

Betsy
 
Ooooohh this is a good thread. I was actually coming to this forum to start my own thread today on this very topic. I haven’t been to confession since I was in Catholic school in 8th grade, so it’s been a long time!

My question is, I have read that you only need to confess mortal sins. And sins are only considered mortal sins when you have full knowledge that they are a sin BEFORE you commit them, but you commit them anyways, correct?

So, if I did something back in my youth that I didn’t know was considered a mortal sin at the time, but now I do, I don’t need to confess it correct?

I’m just trying to make sure I confess all I need to, but don’t confess the “little” things and annoy Father by talking his ear off on things that I can be absolved of at Mass. 🙂

Thanks!
 
Jeanette L:
I just made my first confession after over 40 years. It was an amazing experience of grace, Jeanette
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How wonderful! Congrats. I have been praying that my husband will go back. We’ve been married almost 22 yrs and as far as I know, he has not been in that time. We talked about it recently and he said he might go back, but that was the last of it. —KCT
 
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AnneBOK:
Yahoooooo!
I went to confession yesterday and it was GREAT! My priest was so gentle and guided me carefully when I needed a little help. I thought after 26 years it would be next to impossible to make a good confession - boy was I wrong. Now I have the courage and the drive to take care of my needed annulment and to have my current marriage blessed by the church. 👍
Anne
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Blessings to you! I know how you feel, like you just had a good scrub! :yup:
 
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SavedByHim:
So, if I did something back in my youth that I didn’t know was considered a mortal sin at the time, but now I do, I don’t need to confess it correct?
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That is correct! Of course, now that you know these things are sins, if you do them again, you must confess, but you already knew that.

I’m so happy for you - this is a wonderful sacrament. Keep coming back!

Betsy
 
I am a new convert and I am going to make my first confession on the day I take my first communion. I have been kind of worried because of a mortal sin in my past. What should I do?
 
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RTMirage:
I am a new convert and I am going to make my first confession on the day I take my first communion. I have been kind of worried because of a mortal sin in my past. What should I do?
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When you make your first confession, you will of course tell your priest that this is your first one. At this point, you should already have examined your conscience, which it sounds like you have because of your concern of this mortal sin. Your priest has heard everything imaginable, you will not embarrass him or shock him! You confess it! And he will gently walk you through this first confession to make sure you have covered everything!

Don’t be worried or afraid. When it is over, you will feel brand new!
 
Thank you. Maybe this is stupid of me but I have been terrified that I would not be allowed to participate in the Eucharist. I want more then anything to receive Christ in the Eucharist, that is what brought me to the Catholic Church.
 
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RTMirage:
Thank you. Maybe this is stupid of me but I have been terrified that I would not be allowed to participate in the Eucharist. I want more then anything to receive Christ in the Eucharist, that is what brought me to the Catholic Church.
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The whole point of confession (maybe not the whole point) is that you can receive Christ in the Eucharist having been cleansed! Go confess, receive forgiveness, receive Christ!
 
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