How Downplayed is the Vocation to Single Life?

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Most of the other threads concerning The Single Life Vocation are locked and the most recent – I believe – was back in 2015.

But this question comes from personal experience and thoughts of a recent Diocesan provided retreat focusing on Vacations. The sole concept was the discernment of Religious Life for both male and female even thought it was promoted as Life Awareness and a non-committal. The majority was young adults (high school and college attending).

Being a 30-Something who might have a few crushes and maybe one test relationship and still virgin, I was mostly seen as Nun material. Single-life and Married-Life wasn’t as a potential calling for me.

After asking around, I encountered that the most retreatants who were in my same age bracket or older had been to this retreat before. Some felt incomplete or somewhat concerned that they haven’t found someone to marry or don’t feel they’re good enough for the Spiritual-Life and thought – maybe – God is calling them/us to the Single-Life. However, we would be challenged for coming to those assumptions on our own and be told to strongly consider entering the Religious Life.

When we asked about how to discern if we were called for marriage or single, we were told that is was Marriage prep was for but then told for us to seek out couples and talked to them what marriage is like. Then at a certain point, an account was made regarding ones sister who never got married but always appeared to be a very good aunt and was able to assist in raising or loving those kids because she was/is a single professional female .

How reliant has your Diocese been when it comes to matters of Single-Life Vocations? Any retreats, services, or events geared toward helping single Catholics discern that moment of I’m-No-Longer-A-Young-Adult-Yet-I-Have-No-Clue-What-God-Is-Calling-Me-To-Do-With-the-Rest-of-My-Life?
 
There’s no such thing as the vocation to the single life. The unconsecrated single life is a transitional period. Either you’re called to marriage or to a religious vocation.
 
SacredHeartBassist said:
There’s no such thing as the vocation to the single life. The unconsecrated single life is a transitional period. Either you’re called to marriage or to a religious vocation.
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I agree. It is a “state of life”, not a vocation. Not all states of life are vocations.
 
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Having said that, there is a range of religious vocations. St. Catherine of Siena lived in her house as a Dominican Tertiary.
 
Right, but to the OP: there’s no need to convince anyone that single people can lead happy, full, rich lives, like the maiden aunt you mentioned who is a good mentor for her nieces and nephews. I think we’d all agree on that.

Just because singleness isn’t a vocation doesn’t mean single people can’t lead happy and holy lives.
 
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I completely agree with you I think for a woman the options are either a marriage OR some form or religious vocation.
 
Absolutely FALSE, and it is precisely this monumental error which is propagated today implicitly in the Church which must be denounced. One does not have to enter into religious orders to PERFECTLY consecrate one’s celibacy to God.
I quote Pope Pius 12 in his encyclical Sacras Virginitas
  1. And while this perfect chastity is the subject of one of the three vows which constitute the religious state,[9] and is also required by the Latin Church of clerics in major orders[10] and demanded from members of Secular Institutes,[11] it also flourishes among many who are lay people in the full sense: men and women who are not constituted in a public state of perfection and yet by private promise or vow completely abstain from marriage and sexual pleasures, in order to serve their neighbor more freely and to be united with God more easily and more closely.
  2. To all of these beloved sons and daughters who in any way have consecrated their bodies and souls to God, We address Ourselves, and exhort them earnestly to strengthen their holy resolution and be faithful to it.
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I invite everyone to read this encyclical
http://w2.vatican.va/content/pius-x...s/hf_p-xii_enc_25031954_sacra-virginitas.html
 
SusanneT said:
I completely agree with you I think for a woman the options are either a marriage OR some form or religious vocation.
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Uh, no. Marriage is great. Being a sister is great. They are not the only options.

(seriously, what the heck?)
 
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I agree with SacredHeartBassist :)! Even if someone is called to the “single life” it would have to be consecrated singlehood. No one is called to just, you know, hover around in the world kind of bobbing around without a vocation. The Catechism recognizes Holy orders, the consecrated life, and marriage as the three vocations, and “unconsecrated single” is not one of them. Good luck! 🙂
 
I think what they mean is that consecrated single life and other forms of consecrated life in the world are an option. This is correct though. If one is not called to marriage or to be a sister or brother, chances are one is called to one of these other forms of consecrated life 🙂
 
Reasonably can you explain why there would be only these two options? let us think a little, and the homosexuals who are prohibited from marriage by the Church and also who can not enter the priesthood, what solutions therefore for them? So there would not be a model of sanctification to offer them?
I remember that religious life did not exist at the beginning of Christianity, yet there were many people who devoted their chastity to God. At the time St. Paul wrote to advise celibacy, religious life did not exist!
 
It seems like it doesn’t it? Well, remember that God will never ask us to do something that is not right for us. He won’t ask us to do something that doesn’t fulfill us. If one doesn’t feel called to a form of consecrated life, maybe this person is called to marriage and just needs to meet the person God made for them. It’s a matter of taking it one day at a time, and letting God speak to us as we spend time with Him you know? A blind plunge into the deep so to speak.
 
Well, it’s important to take I to account all the forms of consecrated life recognized by the church. One does not have to be a nun or a brother or a priest to be consecrated. Consecrated Virgin ( like the ones in the early church) living in the world, having a career, owning their own home and such still exist. The vocation to this is called “ Cinsecrated Virginity” and there is a literal wedding for this sacrament with a Bishop giving the new consecrated virgin a ring and everything lol! It’s actually really nice and there’s a bunch of videos of consecrated virgin weddings in YouTube. Either way, when one says the consecrated life, we all assume sister or bother, but there are many forms recognized by the church 🙂
 
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That’s still the religious life. It’s just private consecration with a private vow. The single life on its own isn’t a vocation. It’s just a state of nonvocation
 
NO, it’s not a religious live. Religious life as officially recognized by the Church excludes all forms of private consecration! please inform your self better…
 
What this means…ex sinner cannot become nun/monk only chaste-single
 
let’s think a bit. So homosexuals and all those who naturally have a disability that prevents them from having a valid marriage are necessarily obliged to have a religious vocation to be a “normal” and “complete” Christian?
 
No! Not at all! One can be a brother or sister if that is one’s vocation no matter what the peron’s past may be! Remember, God chooses those He wants not those who are worthy or deserve it 🙂
 
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