Marriage Preparation - Different Diocese

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tnsmestizo

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Hi All,

Any advice would be appreciated. Can a couple do marriage preparation at a parish in one diocese and get married in another diocese’s parish?

The issue that we’re facing is the marriage preparation for our parish, instilled by our diocese, is a 9-month process, but the marriage preparation of our hometown’s diocese (same state - 3 hours away) is 6 months. Our wedding is 7 months away. There was a misunderstanding when speaking with our parish regarding the process. What we understood was we were required to be registered and attending mass at the parish for 3 months and that the marriage preparation took a total of 9 months. We were new to the parish at that time and parishes back home didn’t require registrations as far as we knew. We thought that the 3 months were included in those 9 months, but they’re not. We don’t know what to do now since our date has already been set with our venue and wedding things are in motion. Have any of you been in this situation?
 
Just call your parish and ask. They alone can answer, not anyone here.
 
tnsmestizo said:
Have any of you been in this situation?
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Yes. We did our marriage prep in the neighbouring Diocese due to time constraints. We obtained permission from our parish priest to do this, and were married in our parish church.

Just ask your parish priest for advice; if you explain your dilemma, I’m sure he’ll do his best to help. 😊. I’m not sure whether all Dioceses allow this to be done, but it’s certainly worth asking! Best wishes!
 
On Tuesday (many Catholic offices are closed today and Easter Monday), call your parish, the one inside whose boundaries you live, and make an appointment to speak with the pastor.

Catholics are very strongly encouraged to speak with their pastor, not just read the bulletin or website, before scheduling a wedding date. So, that did not happen, but speak to your pastor with humility and ask what can be done to help.
 
In our diocese the official interviews by the priest must be done in the parish in which one resides. A formal marriage preparation course may be done in any parish (many of our parishes are rural and do not have marriage prep courses). The couple are given a certificate indicating that they have completed a marriage preparation course. In order to marry in another diocese, permission from the bishop is required. In our archdiocese, the pastor who meets with the couple sends the prenuptial file to the bishop, along with the couple’s request to marry outside the diocese, the bishop signs off on the request, and he sends it to the bishop of the diocese where the couple intend to marry. That bishop also signs off on the request.

This can take time, so couples are encouraged to get their marriage prep started early if they intend to marry in another diocese.
 
That is such a messed up situation. I am sorry you are going through this. Preparing for a wedding is stressful enough as it is. The hard work and stress is still fresh on my mind as I barely got married 3 months ago.

If I were you I would talk to someone from your parish and try to learn if there are any marriage prep classes that are not as long. Me and my fiance only had to go to 3 classes I believe but they were hours, hours long… Basically they condensed 9 weeks of classes into 3 weeks. Maybe something similar is going on and you can attend that. And the classes we did were in a neighboring diocese and my parish said that it was okay to do that. Maybe they will let you attend a class outside the diocese too if you can find one that would meet your requirement. I would also call up the priest who is going to preside at the wedding and let him know what is going on asap. Like a 911, red alert call.
 
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Our marriage prep was 6 months. My wife lived in a different state for college. We prepped in the summer for the classes but really, you just need to call the priest and talk to him personally, explaining your situation. I’m sure a solution can be arranged.
 
His_helpmeet said:
In our diocese the official interviews by the priest must be done in the parish in which one resides.
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This is because under the law of the Church, we have pastors and they determine the “one time” sacraments (Baptism, Confirmation, Marriage, Holy Orders). You live inside St Blah parish yet you want to get Baptized/Confirmed/Married in either St Thus and Such either across town or across the world, St Blah’s pastor is the one who grants permission.

Often, as you describe, the Diocese has a policy where it is easy to cross boundaries for Sacramental Prep. Still, that “home parish pastor” has to be in the loop.

Oh, and if the couple lives in different Dioceses, the Bride’s Pastor is the first one you contact.
LaughingBoy1503 said:
That is such a messed up situation.
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Actually, in the US, Dioceses work hard to make sure people can access the information they need far before they book a reception venue.

US Bishops:

http://www.usccb.org/issues-and-act.../marriage/marriage-preparation/mpanalysis.cfm


Various Diocese websites::
https://www.allentowndiocese.org/marriageprep

https://www.sdcatholic.org/office-for/family-life-and-spirituality/marriage-preparation/

https://www.archsa.org/marriage-family/marriage-preparation

https://www.bostoncatholic.org/Offices-And-Services/Office-Detail.aspx?id=11654&pid=478
 
TheLittleLady said:
Actually, in the US, Dioceses work hard to make sure people can access the information they need far before they book a reception venue.

US Bishops:
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Didn’t say it’s the Diocese’ fault, just that it’s a messed up the situation regardless of how it happened.

And Happy Easter, all!
 
As far as you can plan for now, what parish would you be living in, as a married couple?

Where do you want to attend mass, send your kids to Sunday school, get their sacraments, and any you yourselves may be missing?

I’m guessing that’s what the priest would ask you, as you should really be asking him. Have you decided on a location for the wedding?

Edit: Sorry, I hadn’t read your full post…
But the diocese should honor the fact that you did get the OK elsewhere.

God bless you, and your upcoming marriage!
 
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