Mother has stopped attending mass

[aforem]

I have just gotten back from my first year of college and have found out that my mother has stopped going to mass. She says she feels like she is simply going through the motions and feels that the other people attending are doing the same thing. She says that many of them are hypocrites and that she doesn’t understand why she should go if it feels “like some sort of charade”. This is also having a negative effect on my younger siblings as they are learning from her example. Is there any advice that any of you could give to help me in this difficult situation?

 

[TheLittleLady]

Be loving to her. Be kind. Don’t preach at her.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

If you’re close to her, you might ask her in a non-confrontational, understanding way, like maybe if you two are having lunch together or something, whether something happened at church or why she now feels differently about Mass. It may be that a priest or parishioner was unkind to her, or unkind to someone else in front of her. Just listen and don’t try to pressure or convince her.

 

[DisorientingSneeze]

Maybe suggest that she she look into going on some sort of retreat.

 

[StillWandering]

Maybe take her to the Latin Mass or maybe even to some kind of Catholic soup kitchen or charity run by the Church. Don’t preach at her, and don’t tell her that she is wrong. By exposing her to the Latin Mass for example she will see very devout people, in a completely different cultural setting. It might appeal more to her. Likewise by exposing her to Catholic charity events or works helps refocus the mind on the active work of the Church. When we feel spiritually down-beaten, sometimes concentrating on the works of mercy can help. Most importantly of all, say the rosary for her and entrust her to Our Lady. She’ll sort her out.

 

[JMMJ]

Your Mom is like the rest of us. She is living a long life and there will be bumps in the road. Sometimes takinng a step back to re-evaluate the choices and decisions we make in the way we choose to live is a very good and healthy thing.

I would suggest giving your mom her space so she can work things out for herself. Let her know you love her and that you are there for her. I wouldn’t “dig” at her with regards to this issue.