Ovulation and Lust

[natalia_3]

(Warning) This here does regard the ovulation/period cycle in case anyone is uncomfortable with it, along with physical attraction topics.

Normally, I am very concerned about chastity. In my relationship (not married-but we ardently do want to) I’m always making sure we do not kiss or have a situation leading to sensual feelings. I will even ask him if he feels that when I sit too close to him if it may be leading to that, and if it does I feel very sorry towards God that I have sinned, and make sure that pattern does not occur again.That is how I am on my “normal” days and “period” days. When ovulation week comes around, I realize that I start behaving more flirty, happy-go-lucky, cheery, and am more inclined to this risk of sexual desire. It is different every month, some months are not so strong, other months it’s so hard to stop thinking about it.

I do not feel as if it is lust, more of sexual desire for wanting a baby, but I do realize that we are not married and cannot behave like this. Last time I behaved too happy, I let us kiss passionately and some physical touching. I was not aroused physically (he most likely was) but I thoroughly enjoyed it without no guilt whatsoever. Even when I went to mass I did not feel guilty. I felt too happy-go-lucky to feel that I have done anything wrong, even though I know I committed sin.

When I am not ovulating, I am very on guard of not offending God. Then when it comes up I either think about sex/babies or at times act on it. Does this mean I have committed mortal sin against God, despite having a weakness towards it?

I try very hard to check on myself with sinful issues, even outside of this, but it takes just one weakness to mess up. I often feel as if all these times I saved myself from doing wrong, it can never account for when I do the wrong thing.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Scripture talks about learning to be masters of our bodily appetites. The spiritual answer is often fasting (done if your physician and your pastor feel you are healthy enough to do it). Learning to keep one appetite under control helps with other appetites.

 

[Hoosier-Daddy]

If you use NFP this will become even more pronounced. Ovulation often includes a stronger desire for relations and better relations due to several factors.

 

[LoveJesus13]

I know what you mean as a single young woman. It is hard but we must try to avoid being too close. What helps is reading books on chastity, praying to the saints and to our Blessed Mother, also 1 rosary. I think it is ok to be “happy and cheery” as you said but to also not put ourselves and him in a situation where the risk is high. Hopefully you both get married soon, will pray for you!

 

[natalia_3]

Thank you. So far the rosary helps as I know I can ask for help through Mary our Mother after offending God.

Although when I go to confession and make a promise to try my best not to do it again, it only lasts a few months, and then I forget and fall again. I am glad that this isn’t a daily or weekly issue for me, but I am still ashamed that I have let it slip when I should know better.

I have heard of some Christian couples maintaining chastity so well, and I wonder how they can do it for so many years. I assume that it must be influenced through their well-maintained Christian family.
I am thinking about having regulated meetings with a priest (boyfriend and I) to have a discussion, a preparation for marriage/engagement. Neither of us have good family figures to stand by, and my closest family members have had sex before marriage. I am hoping to find a priest that is willing for this, and will convince us to behave and love better.