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brittanyjohns
Guest
** thanks to everyone who replied.**
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Lou2U
Guest
Can he get advice from your Priest? Would your Priest be able to recommend counseling that would be within your budget?
Remind him that although he struggles, he is in control of his actions. He can choose to block this girl’s number. He can choose to stay away from her. He needs to take accountability for his actions.
I don’t mean to overstep here, but I would recommend you get a health check, regardless of what he is telling you.
He is incredibly lucky to still have you.
Remind him that although he struggles, he is in control of his actions. He can choose to block this girl’s number. He can choose to stay away from her. He needs to take accountability for his actions.
I don’t mean to overstep here, but I would recommend you get a health check, regardless of what he is telling you.
He is incredibly lucky to still have you.
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F_Marturana
Guest
His sins are his.
You are his wife. You aren’t his conscience. You won’t be able to change him. He needs to change. Doing things for him, being extra available to him won’t change him
Pray for him.
Don’t allow him to mistreat you.
Telling his coworker you’re into having an open relationship is a pretty low thing to do. Don’t allow him to manipulate you like that. That’s manipulative, “I told a coworker I can cheat and you’re fine with it. Oh my what should I do?”
What does he expect you to say and do? “Oh please sweetie, don’t stray, I’ll be better.”
Maybe divorce should be an option.
You are his wife. You aren’t his conscience. You won’t be able to change him. He needs to change. Doing things for him, being extra available to him won’t change him
Pray for him.
Don’t allow him to mistreat you.
Telling his coworker you’re into having an open relationship is a pretty low thing to do. Don’t allow him to manipulate you like that. That’s manipulative, “I told a coworker I can cheat and you’re fine with it. Oh my what should I do?”
What does he expect you to say and do? “Oh please sweetie, don’t stray, I’ll be better.”
Maybe divorce should be an option.
Tis_Bearself
Patron
Your husband has problems, and they may well have a mental health component.
You cannot “help” him or “fix” him.
It’s like he was an alcoholic.
You didn’t cause this problem, you can’t control it, and you can’t cure it.
The only thing that will change him is his own motivation and desire to change his behavior.
Unless and until he himself takes steps to change, then you have the option of separation/ divorce or just putting up with it.
The one thing you can do is get counseling. If you can’t get him to go with you to counseling then you should be at least getting some on your own to help you cope.
I’d recommend asking your diocese or your local mental health hotline if they can recommend some low-cost options.
If you take the position that you can’t afford the counseling then you’ve pretty much closed the door on the one thing you’re actually able to do here (short of separation/ divorce).
Good luck and God bless.
You cannot “help” him or “fix” him.
It’s like he was an alcoholic.
You didn’t cause this problem, you can’t control it, and you can’t cure it.
The only thing that will change him is his own motivation and desire to change his behavior.
Unless and until he himself takes steps to change, then you have the option of separation/ divorce or just putting up with it.
The one thing you can do is get counseling. If you can’t get him to go with you to counseling then you should be at least getting some on your own to help you cope.
I’d recommend asking your diocese or your local mental health hotline if they can recommend some low-cost options.
If you take the position that you can’t afford the counseling then you’ve pretty much closed the door on the one thing you’re actually able to do here (short of separation/ divorce).
Good luck and God bless.
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Trishie
Guest
I’ll pray that somehow God can work miracles in your life.
You have a lot more courage or something than I could summon under such circumstances.
May God bless and protect you.
I honestly couldn’t take that kind of behaviour. I don’t think my self respect would take it, nor could I handle that level of pain over radical betrayal in such essential aspects of the marriage relationship and vows.
I also couldn’t take my children being modeled and mentored by example like this, if I have, or might have, children under such circumstances, because ultimately it couldn’t be hidden from them. I couldn’t stand allowing my children, my sons, to carry on the generational cycle of such behaviour to their future poor wives, or for my daughters to think it acceptable or inevitable to be on the receiving end.
Maybe it’s my lack of humility or maybe it’s related to some kind of moral compass. I treasure my husband’s honesty too much. I couldn’t do without that kind of certainty and trust.
May God flood His graces on your husband and you,.
May He loving heal all that is to be healed, including the terrible abuse of your husband’s father against him that has done so much violence to your husband’s mind and soul.
May God heal your father-in-law’s soul and mind, and may He give restoration to his wife.
May our Mother pray for you both. May God’s Angels intercede and protect you.
You have a lot more courage or something than I could summon under such circumstances.
May God bless and protect you.
I honestly couldn’t take that kind of behaviour. I don’t think my self respect would take it, nor could I handle that level of pain over radical betrayal in such essential aspects of the marriage relationship and vows.
I also couldn’t take my children being modeled and mentored by example like this, if I have, or might have, children under such circumstances, because ultimately it couldn’t be hidden from them. I couldn’t stand allowing my children, my sons, to carry on the generational cycle of such behaviour to their future poor wives, or for my daughters to think it acceptable or inevitable to be on the receiving end.
Maybe it’s my lack of humility or maybe it’s related to some kind of moral compass. I treasure my husband’s honesty too much. I couldn’t do without that kind of certainty and trust.
May God flood His graces on your husband and you,.
May He loving heal all that is to be healed, including the terrible abuse of your husband’s father against him that has done so much violence to your husband’s mind and soul.
May God heal your father-in-law’s soul and mind, and may He give restoration to his wife.
May our Mother pray for you both. May God’s Angels intercede and protect you.
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Retsel
Guest
Unless faced with loss of something dear to them, many husbands don’t change.
It’s good to work with him if he’s is willing, if not, he would be breaking his vows he made to you. (i.e. Love, honor and obey)
A continuation of that behavior would create a voluntary (on his part), marriage of one.
Voluntary marriages of one are non-marriages.
It’s good to work with him if he’s is willing, if not, he would be breaking his vows he made to you. (i.e. Love, honor and obey)
A continuation of that behavior would create a voluntary (on his part), marriage of one.
Voluntary marriages of one are non-marriages.
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EZweber
Guest
My only advice is pray. The Blessed Virgin and St. Maria Gorreti can pull both of you through. There is nothing more powerful than prayer. I will pray for you.
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TheLittleLady
Guest
Will add on to this, most communities have a “Community Counseling Service” or something similar that does counseling on a sliding scale.
Call Catholic Charities about counseling.
Make appointments with your priest.
Call Catholic Charities about counseling.
Make appointments with your priest.
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