Skepticism from Laxed Catholic/Christian Parents

[vk02]

For about a year, I have been much closer to God with my faith and dedication to Catholicism. However, ever time I try to bring up how being devoted to Church and Jesus everyday is important to my parents, they feel that I am taking things way too seriously. They don’t believe that I should be worried about salvation. They are Catholic/Orthodox Christian and they believe in God, go to Church, and pray. However, they do not agree with everything the Church teaches. I try to bring up Catholicism to them but I always feel scared that they’re gonna think that I am crazy or brainwashed because they have mentioned that before. I want to talk to them because I care about they and I want them to feel the joys of Catholicism and being closer to God. How do I convince my parents about the benefits of my extreme devotion to Catholicism and about how all the Church’s doctrines must be followed for salvation?

 

[Retsel]

How would a saint convince you to be a saint?

 

[Joe_5859]

It’s difficult for many parents to be “taught” by their children. So consider that you might not (at least at this time) be the best person to teach your parents directly about the faith.

I’d also mention that evangelizing is often a marathon, not a sprint. Certainly, you don’t have to hide your faith. But neither is it necessary to be pushy.

Both my parents and my in-laws are probably more devout now than they were 20 years ago in large part because my wife and I started taking our faith more seriously when we got to college. It sort of worked differently for both of us, though. My wife is much more direct, and not shy about telling her parents things in the most blunt way possible that the Catholic faith is true and if you don’t agree, you’re wrong. But her parents are used to that from her. I’m far less confrontational, and so just living my life and doing Catholic things encouraged my parents to spend more time looking into the faith. Now my mom watches EWTN all the time and is a Scott Hahn fangirl.

From what you have described, it seems like your parents aren’t at a place where they will respond well to an abundance of explicit Catholic catechesis from you. That’s okay. They might just need more time. Keep them in prayer, and pray for wisdom in how you engage in the faith with them.

 

[TheLittleLady]

The only way to convince them is to let them see the pure joy that radiates from you, by letting “your light so shine before men that they see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven”, not by debating, not by condemning, by loving and by joy.

 

[JMMJ]

As children, we wish our parents would take an interest in everything that is important to us. The reality is that there are some subjects where people “don’t want to go”. It doesn’t mean they don’t love you, but sometimes it can feel that way. It may feel like they aren’t interested in the things that are important to you. And to an extent, this is correct, where the matter of your faith is concerned. I would suggest looking at the whole picture. If they are taking an interest in 80% of what you are doing, those are pretty good odds.

Love your parents where they are, and don’t be offended if they aren’t able to take an interest in a certain part of your life. They have reasons, yet they may not even know what they are. Don’t let their lack of interest deter you from living a full life, spirtually and otherwise.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

If your parents “believe in God, go to church, and pray” they aren’t “laxed” or lapsed or whatever you’re trying to say. They are adults and it is normal for a person to have some doubts but continue to practice a faith. One of your parents appears to not even be a Catholic so of course they’re not going to believe everything the Catholic Church teaches.

As others have said, parents are generally not interested in being schooled in religion by their minor children. It’s also likely that they aren’t as interested in religion as you are and don’t want to discuss it as much as you do. And as much as you want to be helpful here, you’re not the expert on your parents’ “salvation”. They may be doing fine with that, regardless of your opinion on what’s necessary.

The best thing you can do is love your parents, try to be the best child of their you can be, and pray for them regularly. Don’t go talking their ear off about religion or lecturing them on how they have to believe thus and so to be “saved”, that just turns people off. Lead by example instead.

 

[13pollitos]

I am catholic and have been my whole life, but if someone was always telling me all about Jesus and the Church it would start to get old.

They don’t believe that I should be worried about salvation.

You’re parents are absolutely correct here. That is for God to take care of.

How do I convince my parents about the benefits of my extreme devotion to Catholicism and about how all the Church’s doctrines must be followed for salvation?

Extreme devotion may not be a good thing if it causes you to worry about salvation. I don’t really know what you mean by extreme devotion, but normally something extreme is troublesome. Also, you can’t convince anyone to believe or have
Faith. You can lead by example and you can pray, but to talk about this every conversation will just end up pushing them away. Trying to scare them into becoming the kind of people you want them to be (all doctrines must be followed for salvation, extreme devotion) won’t ever work.

I would suggest talking to a priest who knows you and your family. He may be able to help you all find a better way to share the faith with each other.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

Yeah, I would just add to this if the reason you’re having devotion to Catholicism is just in order to gain salvation, you’re at a pretty beginner level step.
You should be devoted in order to love God and your neighbor the best you can, and let God worry about your salvation. Catholicism isn’t about following all the rules in the rule book so you get saved.

 

[Dr_Meinheimer]

Very true. That is how so many were converted through the example of the early Christian martyrs; they were proud and joyful, but not intentionally defiant or lecturing.