St. Monica pray for us! Praying for our husbands....

  • Thread starter Thread starter Lone_Catholic
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
L

Lone_Catholic

Guest
I wanted to start this thread as a place for wives with unbelieving/non-Catholic husbands to come together to pray and support each other. I am a Catholic convert of 2 years now and pray every day for the conversion of my husband. I have found the intercession of St. Monica to be very encouraging, so thought maybe she could be the patroness saint of this thread.

Please join and introduce yourselves!
 
Lone Catholic:
I wanted to start this thread as a place for wives with unbelieving/non-Catholic husbands to come together to pray and support each other. I am a Catholic convert of 2 years now and pray every day for the conversion of my husband. I have found the intercession of St. Monica to be very encouraging, so thought maybe she could be the patroness saint of this thread.

Please join and introduce yourselves!
Click to expand...
Hi, I’m a guy (just passing through), but I thought you might be able to use this:

PRAYER TO ST. MONICA

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(Mention your intention here.)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.

Amen.

God bless you all.
 
I love this idea!!!

I am a baptized Catholic who never knew the faith until about 7 years ago when my then fiance’ challenged me over several of our beliefs. I began to study in earnest and he and I have had many lively debates since then.

We have now been married for 4 1/2 years and have settled into a routine that does not include our faiths for the most part. He doesn’t challange me as much anymore but he also doesn’t criticize me either.

Although we never really discussed it, I am teaching the faith to our two children (son 15, daughter 6). It is difficult in that I have to admit sins that we committed to them that my husband thinks is no big deal.

I pray every day for his conversion. My greatest wish is for us to be able to worship together and raise our family together in one faith. Maybe if we all pray for each other some of us can see conversions in our spouses.
 
Hi! 👋 I found it!!!

I love the prayer to St. Monica. I didn’t grow up praying to Saints, but every now and then, when I think of it, I do ask her to pray for my husband. I’ll need to make a copy of it to keep in my bible.

So…my husband’s name is Kevin. He has always gone to church with me but became very irritated with me when I started getting very close to God after our first child was born. He’s mellowed out since then, not quite ready to leave me anymore over all that “God stuff” (he thought it was harmful to our children), but he’s still very uncomfortable with anything having to do with God. I think it’s the holy Spirit convicting his heart of sin, but he thinks it’s me being judgemental.

What about the rest of you?

In Christ,
Nancy 🙂
 
Oh my oh my oh my… thank you thank you thank you… this is a place for me!!!

My husband, Travis, is pretty much agnostic. He claims to believe but has never shown anything to “prove” it. Ya know? I’m not being condescending, but when you won’t offer to lead the family in prayer, won’t say the Our Father, nothing, it makes you wonder. We’ve gotten into arguments over my faith and his lack thereof when I was just getting full throttle back into the Church. He’s always hated it when I’ve brought up the differences between the protestant religions and Catholicism (even when I was doing it just as a “Hey, this is interesting, check this out!” type deal) I have since gotten into arguments with his mother and sister because they are anti-Catholic and think I’m trying to convert him.

He’s in Iraq right now and I have prayed so much for him to at least get baptized before he left. Well, he made sure he didn’t do it. His family threw in my face that I knew of his non-Catholic “religion” before we married (which is kinda true… I never realized how agnostic he was) but I’d like for us to become as one family. He does allow me to raise our children Catholic, but I’m so afraid that if our next child is a boy, he’ll put the brakes on a baptism.

He’s an intelligent man so I have to reach him on an intellectual level, without emotion. That’s hard for me, but what’s harder is when I do try to reach him on an intellectual level, he tunes me out. He refuses to read anything I give him. I’m at a loss and it hurts. As much as I’d love to see us as a totally Catholic family, I actually yearn for him more just to get baptised!

Thanks so much for starting this thread. I’ll keep ya’ll in my prayers.

St. Monica, pray for us!
Theresa
 
This is wonderful. I have wanted to start a prayer group with some wives I know, for our husbands, but as yet, has not gotten off the ground.
My husband’s name is Tony. He was baptised a catholic just before we got married. We used to discuss religion a lot then and he always listened to me and respected what I had to say but since we’ve been married, he’s lost all interest. When he’s fighting with me he won’t go to mass with me but will go elsewhere.
We have had and are having many many problems, but nothing that a real conversion of heart and soul won’t fix. (We need a miracle actually)
His whole life is out of balance. He goes to mass but believes in God in his way, not the catholic way. He went to a few catechism classes but they were nothing in depth and has not since read anything on the faith or tried to get a deeper understanding of the church.
He used to pray the rosary with the children and me but now won’t do that either. I go to Adoration at least once a week and pray for him and his conversion. It really feels like there’s a battle between God and the devil for his soul. Our marriage is teetering on the brink of separation at the moment.
Please pray for him, for us and I will pray for all of you too.
God Bless you all. This is just what we need
 
My mother prayed every day for my father’s conversion. He was a Godly man, just not in a “formal” way – his religion was fishing! 🙂 Her prayers were answered, but not until the day before my father died. Although it didn’t happen as soon as she had wished, I know she was greatly comforted by this after his death. My point in telling you this: to all of you out there praying for your husbands, don’t give up! It will happen in God’s time. My husband will be fully initiated into the Church this Easter. I didn’t pressure him, but I think my mother and father had something to do with it! My prayers to you all…
 
Have any of you read the book “Surviving a Spiritual Mismatch”? It’s by Lee Strobel, the guy who wrote “The Case for Christ”, and his wife. They were in our same situation at one point and now Lee is a pastor. Not that any of our guys will ever be pastors…but you catch my drift.

You do need to read it with a critically Catholic eye (one suggestion is that you skip going to church sometimes…not a good suggestion for us), but for the most part I found it very helpful. I loaned it to someone and have been thinking about reading it again. Maybe we could read it together and talk about it a chapter at a time.

In Christ,
Nancy 🙂
 
My biggest issue with my husband is NFP. We use it, but it is only at my insistence. All those years I longed for my husband to convert to the Church. Now, I’d settle for him embracing NFP. Truthfully, I’d like to just take the babies as they come.

I’m so tired of having to be the one who says “no.” I get so angry when he threatens to have a Vasectomy. Sometimes he infers that I’m selfish for using NFP and refusing some sexual practices. I get mad that he wants me to risk my soul.

I could sing a thousand praises for him. But, this one issue has threatened our marriage and disturbed my soul for seven years now.

When I came back to the Church and realized the gravity of the sin I had engaged in, I asked God to let me do penance for the unchastity in my life–both premarital and marital. I guess this is His answer. I hope in a way that He has hardened my dh’s heart for this purpose. I don’t want my husband to punished for this sin. It frightens me that my normally selfless husband is so selfish in such a fundamental thing as openess to life. I am grateful for the chance to do penance, but I’m ready for it to be over now. 😃

Esp. now that I’m 36–I’m not sure how many years of fertility God will permit me. I hope my husband will open his heart to more children.

One good thing I can report is that we are investigating joining a Catholic community through Presentation Ministries. It would involve meeting and praying with Catholic families every two weeks. Also, there is a common rule to follow that the community develops–such as daily prayer. I’m really surprised that dh is not just open to it, but very interested in it. 🙂
 
I try to be the best Catholic and best example of our Blessed Mother I can be, be open and “out-loud” when I speak to our children of the faith, try not to nit-pick, pray daily, devote our daily decade of the Rosary to my husband’s conversion, have a Green Scapular hanging on the bed, and pray the little prayer on it daily. I have seem changes in my husband I never could have hoped on, but he still isn’t converted. I know it’s just a matter of time, patience, and prayer.

I’m reminded of the analogy that if a child brought a toy to Daddy to fix it, Daddy could fix it a whole lot easier without the child poking, prodding, annoying him, sticking his fingers in the work, etc. This is how I approach my prayer for my husband. I don’t do anything to “convert” my husband, except perhaps leave some reading material around. If he reads it, wonderful, I don’t claim to know what manner God will use to convert my husband.

God Bless whomever started this thread. This matter has been close to my heart for literally years.
 
I, too, pray for my husband.

He was baptised Catholic but his parents never took him to Church. They wanted him to choose when he grew up. :rolleyes: Well, he chose nothing. So nothing he is.

We had our son baptised, he is now 10 and there will be no choosing. He is Catholic. Our son and I attend Mass twice a week and I homeschool using mostly Catholic stuff.

We use NFP at avoid children, mostly for health reasons.

We invite the priest to lunch and are planning dinner with him soon. He likes our priest, many of our friends are Catholic and he can’t stand negative jokes about the Catholic Church. He waits for us to pray before he eats. He takes me to Church when I can’t drive.

BUT, he is still not Catholic. I pray for him. But like most of you, I don’t nit pick about it. I have tried to leave it in God’s hands. That is not saying that I don’t worry about it. I worry every day about his soul. I try to turn that worry into prayer.

We have been married for 14 years.
 
Please know that even your husband’s decision NOT to have a vasectomy is a blessing. Mine had one without ever discussing it with me.

My brother, who is a pastor, has told me that God’s timing is perfect, and that when my husband comes to the Lord it will be far better for having taken as long as it has then if he had come to the Lord years ago. I take heart in that because I know that God is infinitely wiser than I am and cares much more about my husband’s salvation that I do.

In Christ,
Nancy 🙂
JMJ Theresa:
My biggest issue with my husband is NFP. We use it, but it is only at my insistence. All those years I longed for my husband to convert to the Church. Now, I’d settle for him embracing NFP. Truthfully, I’d like to just take the babies as they come.

I’m so tired of having to be the one who says “no.” I get so angry when he threatens to have a Vasectomy. Sometimes he infers that I’m selfish for using NFP and refusing some sexual practices. I get mad that he wants me to risk my soul.

I could sing a thousand praises for him. But, this one issue has threatened our marriage and disturbed my soul for seven years now.

When I came back to the Church and realized the gravity of the sin I had engaged in, I asked God to let me do penance for the unchastity in my life–both premarital and marital. I guess this is His answer. I hope in a way that He has hardened my dh’s heart for this purpose. I don’t want my husband to punished for this sin. It frightens me that my normally selfless husband is so selfish in such a fundamental thing as openess to life. I am grateful for the chance to do penance, but I’m ready for it to be over now. 😃

Esp. now that I’m 36–I’m not sure how many years of fertility God will permit me. I hope my husband will open his heart to more children.

One good thing I can report is that we are investigating joining a Catholic community through Presentation Ministries. It would involve meeting and praying with Catholic families every two weeks. Also, there is a common rule to follow that the community develops–such as daily prayer. I’m really surprised that dh is not just open to it, but very interested in it. 🙂
Click to expand...
 
Great words of encouragement! Thanks!
40.png
mass4life:
I try to be the best Catholic and best example of our Blessed Mother I can be, be open and “out-loud” when I speak to our children of the faith, try not to nit-pick, pray daily, devote our daily decade of the Rosary to my husband’s conversion, have a Green Scapular hanging on the bed, and pray the little prayer on it daily. I have seem changes in my husband I never could have hoped on, but he still isn’t converted. I know it’s just a matter of time, patience, and prayer.

I’m reminded of the analogy that if a child brought a toy to Daddy to fix it, Daddy could fix it a whole lot easier without the child poking, prodding, annoying him, sticking his fingers in the work, etc. This is how I approach my prayer for my husband. I don’t do anything to “convert” my husband, except perhaps leave some reading material around. If he reads it, wonderful, I don’t claim to know what manner God will use to convert my husband.

God Bless whomever started this thread. This matter has been close to my heart for literally years.
Click to expand...
 
NFP has been our biggest issue also. My husband has agreed to go along with it, but really pushes doing “other things” during fertile times, and most recently postpartum when intercourse is impossible. I started a thread about it a few days ago… forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=105959

It is an ongoing struggle. I have to wonder if I am sinning when I am coerced into doing something I feel is wrong. I am having a very very hard time respecting him right now after being almost forced into a situation that he knows I am uncomfortable with. I wonder if I should go to confession but in my heart I really feel like I did nothing wrong.

Here is another issue for me, speaking of vasectomies. I have one son who is 5. We started practicing NFP when he was 2 and since then had 3 babies, boom, boom, boom. I now have a 5, 3, and 2 year old and a 2 week old baby. I am so overwhelmed and exhausted and don’t see how our marriage would survive another “woops.” Dh has talked about getting a vasectomy, although I don’t think he really would. But part of me almost wishes he would… I know that is terrible. But it would be so nice for the burden to be off of me.

I have no point in this post. I’m just venting. Please pray for us.

I am so thankful for all of you who have “joined” this thread. Let us pray for each other every day. God bless you all.
 
Hi, my fellow Monicas, I was just wondering how involved your husband is in your children’s Catholicity?

My dh takes my boys to their conquest club (as long as it doesn’t interfere with work or his archery league).

He is off and on again with Mass attendance. In the last month we have started splitting up the big kids to take to different Masses–leaving the loud and unruly littles at home. This is a big improvement. For several months before that he did not go to Mass at all. Last year, he took two kids to the Easter Vigil. I was pretty surprised. I’ve never been to an Easter Vigil.

He generally leads grace before meals. Sometimes he tucks the kids in with prayers. Two years ago, during a brief ( 😦 ) stint in RCIA, he started making the sign of the cross with prayers. It seems like a little thing, but it has meant so much to me not to be reminded at every meal that we are separated by faith.

It seems like twice a year or so, he suggests a family rosary. 🙂 He helps out (if work permits) at my older son’s retreats.

My immediate hope is that he will continue with the Mass attendance. I think it is so important for the kids to see him going to Mass faithfully. I’m hoping the younger kids will never be able to remember a time when Dad did not go to Mass.

Do your husbands take a role in faith life of your children?
 
Wow JMJ… I think you are quite blessed in your situation. Your husband’s heart does not seem to be hard toward the Church. Is he a Christian/does he claim any denomination as his own?

My husband is Protestant–of the “Bible believing” non-denominational type. He has some big hang-ups about the Church, but has come a long way. Sometimes he sinks back into his anti-Catholicism.

Our arrangement was that I could become Catholic, but the family would remain Protestant. I had no idea how hard that would be for me. I am homeschooling my son in kindergarten, and am home with the children all day long, so it is hard not to pass on some of my religious beliefs to them. He does go to Mass with me sometimes–we all go together if the schedule is more convenient, or if he wants to get church out of the way and do something more fun. Our normal arrangement is for me to go to 8:00 Mass and then we all go to 10:30 service at his church. But we don’t get to his church that often, to be honest.

He got very upset that I taught the kids to make the sign of the cross. For the most part, he doesn’t want to have anything to do with anything “Catholic.” But he has been kneeling at Mass lately and that has made me feel better.

I think he is not Catholic only because he doesn’t want to go to the trouble of it. He isn’t the type to spend much mental energy on anything “spiritual.” If he reads anything, it is Golf Digest or Sports Illustrated. Oh well… I keep praying…
 
My husband has always gone to church with me.

Nancy 🙂
JMJ Theresa:
Hi, my fellow Monicas, I was just wondering how involved your husband is in your children’s Catholicity?

My dh takes my boys to their conquest club (as long as it doesn’t interfere with work or his archery league).

He is off and on again with Mass attendance. In the last month we have started splitting up the big kids to take to different Masses–leaving the loud and unruly littles at home. This is a big improvement. For several months before that he did not go to Mass at all. Last year, he took two kids to the Easter Vigil. I was pretty surprised. I’ve never been to an Easter Vigil.

He generally leads grace before meals. Sometimes he tucks the kids in with prayers. Two years ago, during a brief ( 😦 ) stint in RCIA, he started making the sign of the cross with prayers. It seems like a little thing, but it has meant so much to me not to be reminded at every meal that we are separated by faith.

It seems like twice a year or so, he suggests a family rosary. 🙂 He helps out (if work permits) at my older son’s retreats.

My immediate hope is that he will continue with the Mass attendance. I think it is so important for the kids to see him going to Mass faithfully. I’m hoping the younger kids will never be able to remember a time when Dad did not go to Mass.

Do your husbands take a role in faith life of your children?
Click to expand...
 
My husband has never gone to Church with me.

Now, he will go if there is something special. First Communion, Weddings, things like that. But on a regular Sunday, no, he doesn’t go.

Now, he is fully supportive of me. He made sure, when our son was young, that the little one was ready for Church. I never had to get our son dressed for Mass. He will take me, if I can’t drive. He meets us after Mass for lunch. He reminds me that it is Friday, if I go to order meat.

All in all, very helpful. But he does not go to Mass.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top