Third orders: How to discern

[Laura_B]

Hi:
I am a married Catholic mother and have been considering third (secular) orders. I have joined Militia Immaculata and have been renewing my total Consecration to the Virgin Mary (St. Louis Marie de Montfort method) but I don’t seem to know where to go with them. I’ve been considering third orders, especially the Carmelites and Opus Dei (take that Dan Brown! ) but how does one go about discerning the differences between the various spiritualities and God’s will for me? (I tend to take on too much as it is.)
Any advice on this would be appreciated, especially from those with experience with these or similar.
Thanks so much.

 

[plato3]

Very good to hear that you are trying to discern a vocation .We are all called to try to grow in our faith. I am partial to the Franciscans as I have been with them for some time. We have many Catholic moms. This is a very good time to seek spiritual direction. Often our pastors are too busy to take time, but there are many in religious orders that do spiritual direction and will help you find the answer within yourself as to which third order that God is calling you to.

May God bless you as you seek to serve him in a more special way.
Deacon Tony SFO

 

[T.A.Stobie_SFO]

I agree with Tony that a spiritual director could help you in this.

Also read about each order and carefully examine their charism. Do you feel called to this charism. If not, this is not the order for you.

Pray on it often and listen carefully for responses. This can lead you in the right direction.

 

[FCEGM]

Laura B:

Hi:
I am a married Catholic mother and have been considering third (secular) orders. I have joined Militia Immaculata and have been renewing my total Consecration to the Virgin Mary (St. Louis Marie de Montfort method) but I don’t seem to know where to go with them. I’ve been considering third orders, especially the Carmelites and Opus Dei (take that Dan Brown! ) but how does one go about discerning the differences between the various spiritualities and God’s will for me? (I tend to take on too much as it is.)
Any advice on this would be appreciated, especially from those with experience with these or similar.
Thanks so much.

Laura, In joining a Secular (Third) Order one is responding to a vocation. So discernment is necessary first to see if God is calling one to follow a Rule of Life and, second, which religious Order expresses the spiritual life to which one believes him or herself called. For me it was the Secular Order of Discalced Carmelites because of that Order’s vocation to tend toward contemplative prayer in the heart of the Church.

Though one may believe oneself to be called to an Order, one’s vocation also must be discerned by the particular Community of the Order which one is seeking to join. After permission is granted to pursue a vocation within a Secular Order, there remains ongoing discernment both by the candidate and the Community before a Definitive Promise may be made.

Some things to ask yourself as you go through your discernment process:

• Are there any impediments (family obligations; unable to receive the Sacraments) to following the Rule of Life of the the Order (whichever that may be)?
• Do I desire to follow the Rule with my whole heart?
• Do I desire, and am I able, to attend the monthly meeting?
• Do I see my committment to the Order as the way of bringing Christ into all aspects of my life?
• Do I desire to grow in the self-knowledge which is humility?
• Am I seeking the exotic (extraordinary experiences/manifestations) or the substantial (living by Faith and not by sight)?
• Am I attracted to the Saints of the Order?
• Will I do the reading and the assignments required?
• Does what I hear and learn at the meetings correspond to the desires of my heart?
• Do I see the Order as another pious group to join, or do I recognize that I am responding to a vocation given to me by God?
• Am I desirous of and willing to make a life-long commitment to the Order?

God bless you in your discernment.

 

[maggiec]

Laura B:

Hi:
I am a married Catholic mother and have been considering third (secular) orders. I have joined Militia Immaculata and have been renewing my total Consecration to the Virgin Mary (St. Louis Marie de Montfort method) but I don’t seem to know where to go with them. I’ve been considering third orders, especially the Carmelites and Opus Dei (take that Dan Brown! ) but how does one go about discerning the differences between the various spiritualities and God’s will for me? (I tend to take on too much as it is.)
Any advice on this would be appreciated, especially from those with experience with these or similar.
Thanks so much.

Have you heard of the Holy Family Institute? A fully consecrated life in the Pauline family for married and widowed people. Check it out at vocations-holyfamily.com. If I can be of assistance pm me.
I have been a novice with the institute for 3 months after a postulancy period of 9 months. I can tell you that it has made my journey in this world more fulfilling.
God bless,
MaggieC