Waiting for annulment

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jswranch

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If you have a moment, please share some wisdom or written resources on how to remain emotionally grounded in a holy manner while awaiting an annulment. Through a number of spiritual direction sessions, it has become clear I am called to marriage. But, I must first be patient (conservative estimate of 2 years). I am able to self-motivate by thinking of how good life could be with new wife. However, I feel I am called to be happy in the present moment.

Thoughts?

Thanks guys.
 
Not a guy but happy to give you the benefit of my experience.
I dwelled on the outcome daily, actually several times a day and found myself becoming more impatience and discouraged.
Finally I decided to diligently pray, not for the outcome, but for the ability to live day-to-day without thinking about it and the effect the outcome would have.
Gradually I became enlightened to the fantastic benefits of the process. I thanked God for the experience as well a great support system.
It was not long after that I heard from the tribunals.
In all, it took about 18 months (typical for our area).
Best of luck, we are here to listen!
 
jswranch said:
I am able to self-motivate by thinking of how good life could be with new wife. However, I feel I am called to be happy in the present moment.
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The way I am reading this is you feel called to marriage and a new marriage will make you happy. However, you are still married to someone else and waiting on a decision from the Tribunal. You are asking this question to try an affirm your thoughts of being called to be “happy” with a new wife now?

God will never call anyone to sin. Trying to find a spouse while you know you are not free to do so is grave matter and potentially a mortal sin.
 
Lots of prayers for your continued patience. It’s a difficult situation, to be sure. Mine took nowhere near the time-frame the diocese had outlined on their informational page. While I received my decision today, I can tell you that it was a lesson in patience, and a healing process.

There are many positives that come out of this process. I thought about things in ways I hadn’t before, shared experiences with Tribunal officials…I healed a great deal. Then, a few weeks ago when I ran into my ex-spouse, I didn’t feel anger, longing, betrayal, etc. I just felt confusion and curiosity as to why she decided to come someplace she didn’t frequent, but knew I did.
 
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Thanks for the encouragement. Good words. Any tips to redirect my spiritual identity during this ordeal?
 
Perhaps a retreat of some sort would refocus your mind and bring you peace and purpose until you are free to search for someone and marry again.
 
Good idea. Unfortunately for that idea, I have the kids every weekend.
 
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