S
Sir2v4
Guest
I’m getting up in years and before I die I should write a note that may resonate with certain people of any age.
I did not grow up in a loving family.
I think it may be important for a person to realize this as soon as possible in their life, because they may need to try to compensate for it, one way or the other. The symptom of not living in a loving family was, first, the obvious. There was the obvious lack of respect for each other and the lack of affection from the time of my early youth – age 8 for sure.
I had a roof over my head and “food” to eat (my mother liked hot dogs, and she couldn’t afford better). And, I went to a Catholic school. A lot of good things happened to me, which I always recognized, but they were few and far between. I knew they were the exception, rather than the rule.
I think I was perceived as abrasive at work, but not intentionally so, “distant” too. I preferred to avoid people, if I could, and found myself arguing often when I had to deal with them. That arguing was a continuation of the battles in my childhood home.
Decades into my adult life, my boss related to me that I didn’t seem to be sensitive to the feelings of others and he reminded me that “everything is personal.” My rational, scientific, logical ideas didn’t matter.
Whenever the realization hits you about how you grew up, especially if things don’t go your way, I think you have to keep in mind the basic Christian ideal of loving your neighbor, and treating them as somebody who is loved and worthy of the highest respect. I don’t know what “normal” is, but that’s the best I can come up with.
I did not grow up in a loving family.
I think it may be important for a person to realize this as soon as possible in their life, because they may need to try to compensate for it, one way or the other. The symptom of not living in a loving family was, first, the obvious. There was the obvious lack of respect for each other and the lack of affection from the time of my early youth – age 8 for sure.
I had a roof over my head and “food” to eat (my mother liked hot dogs, and she couldn’t afford better). And, I went to a Catholic school. A lot of good things happened to me, which I always recognized, but they were few and far between. I knew they were the exception, rather than the rule.
I think I was perceived as abrasive at work, but not intentionally so, “distant” too. I preferred to avoid people, if I could, and found myself arguing often when I had to deal with them. That arguing was a continuation of the battles in my childhood home.
Decades into my adult life, my boss related to me that I didn’t seem to be sensitive to the feelings of others and he reminded me that “everything is personal.” My rational, scientific, logical ideas didn’t matter.
Whenever the realization hits you about how you grew up, especially if things don’t go your way, I think you have to keep in mind the basic Christian ideal of loving your neighbor, and treating them as somebody who is loved and worthy of the highest respect. I don’t know what “normal” is, but that’s the best I can come up with.