About attending a non-catholic wedding

[slywakka250]

a good friend of our family, he is getting married at a non-Catholic wedding this saturday. He is Catholic and she is not. I am 17 and m y parents are planning to attend. there is doubt that he has the proper annulment or dispensation. I am unaware about the full circumstances of his first marriage, except it was abusive or she was an alcoholic. he has had custudy of his children. I talked to my mom about it a little and she somewhat understands Chruch teaching on marriage but probably doesn’t see the significance of them attending the wedding, and I was unsure how much to talk about it much cause I was not invited. I’m unsure if I should bring it up or talk to them about it again before they go.

 

[St_Veronica]

slywakka250:

a good friend of our family, he is getting married at a non-Catholic wedding this saturday. He is Catholic and she is not. I am 17 and m y parents are planning to attend. there is doubt that he has the proper annulment or dispensation. I am unaware about the full circumstances of his first marriage, except it was abusive or she was an alcoholic. he has had custudy of his children. I talked to my mom about it a little and she somewhat understands Chruch teaching on marriage but probably doesn’t see the significance of them attending the wedding, and I was unsure how much to talk about it much cause I was not invited. I’m unsure if I should bring it up or talk to them about it again before they go.

If there is a concern that this person (a Catholic) has not had an annulment and is remarrying that is a real problem. They are going to be committing adultry.

If it was me, I’d try to find out more info and if this is the case I would not go.

SV

 

[slywakka250]

based on what I know, I would not go myself for that reason but I’m not invited anyways. my question is if I should do anything about my parents going since they don’t completly understand the Church’s true teaching on marriage, and though my mom is somewhat concerned she doesn’t realize the significance of attending.

 

[St_Veronica]

slywakka250:

based on what I know, I would not go myself for that reason but I’m not invited anyways. my question is if I should do anything about my parents going since they don’t completly understand the Church’s true teaching on marriage, and though my mom is somewhat concerned she doesn’t realize the significance of attending.

I think maybe it would be a good idea to explain this to your mother so that she does understand the seriousness of the situation…that’s about all you can do, she is going to decide for herself.

SV

 

[lilder]

If it was MY mother, I would not say anything further. It seems you have tried to discuss it with her and she is still going. So discussing it further may be badgering. But my mother can be very obstinate.

I would maybe give her something to read on the Church’s teaching though, if she seems open. Maybe leave it laying on the kitchen counter

HTH,
Lilder

 

[Confiteor]

Technically, even if he got an annulment, he is bound (as a Catholic) to be married in the Church. This is derived from Canon Law (proper form). The theory is that attending a ceremony outside the Church that should be performed in the Church “gives scandal.” Given today’s environment, this seems a little draconian, but I think that’s the deal. But then, many bishops feel free to disregard other parts of Canon Law…they would be hard pressed to justify why the laity should be bound by the Church law on form of matrimony.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Your a smart person to even consider this issue at your age. Unless you are sure that no Annulment or a lack of dispensation exists, don’t worry about it. You could at some time ask him what the Annulment process was like? Or what the process was like to get the DIspensation to Marry in another church. See what kind of answer you get that will tell you.

 

[martino]

You are in a tough spot and these situations can be confusing even if you understand Church teaching. However this one is a no brainer. You stated that he is a Catholic getting married in a non-Catholic wedding; that in itself is a serious problem. As a matter of fact, it doesn’t even matter whether or not he has had an annulment on his first marrige, he as a Catholic cannot get married outside the Church. Your parents should understand that he is entering into an unholy union and jeopardizing his salvation, and for this reason they should not attend, because attending equates to approval and encouragement.

Following Church teaching is not always easy and sometimes it’s down right torturous, but in the end we all must face Jesus and account for the things that we did and the things that we didn’t do.