M
midori
Guest
Was having a conversation with an attorney today. He was feeling very frustrated, dealing with certain other attorneys who swim in the same local attorney-pool. He works very hard to be an upstanding, ethical individual— but he also happens to work in a field that rewards people for being jerks. 
So, for example-- and I know this comes as a total surprise! --but there are certain attorneys who, if their lips are moving, you know they’re lying. Or they bluster. Or they deliberately misrepresent facts or a chain of events. It’s all part of a strategy, of course-- but even knowing it’s just to manipulate the judge or mediator or whoever in an email chain, ahead of the actual court setting, it’s still enormously frustrating having to deal with people who are professionals, but don’t act in the upstanding way you generally expect from professionals. And for these habitual liars/bullies/whatevers, people just kind of roll with it, even if they’re just spouting out nonsense. “Oh, that’s just Bob, being Bob.” And the good guys get ignored, and people allow Bob to be a jerk, and reward him for being a jerk for giving him his way. But if the honorable and honest individual was to lie to the judge or the mediator about a certain subject— oh, how people would come unglued!
I had noticed that a bit in family situations— the “good” kid versus the “bad” kid. For the good kid, you have expectations, and for him to stray from the “good kid path” is a terrible thing. But for the bad kid, if he makes trouble or does wrong, so many people are willing to say, “Oh, boys will be boys” or “He’ll grow out of it someday” or whatever platitude excuses the bad behavior.
Since I have a Catholic worldview, I have my own opinion about why it’s bad for a good person to step from the path— but just talking about The World, why is Society reluctant to hold people accountable for unscrupulous behavior, even in a situation when individuals are in an authority position over the wrongdoer? Is it just a path-of-least-resistance thing, or…? And if that’s the case, why are there two different codes of conduct-- one code for “nice people” and a different code for people you wouldn’t trust with your grandmother?
So, for example-- and I know this comes as a total surprise! --but there are certain attorneys who, if their lips are moving, you know they’re lying. Or they bluster. Or they deliberately misrepresent facts or a chain of events. It’s all part of a strategy, of course-- but even knowing it’s just to manipulate the judge or mediator or whoever in an email chain, ahead of the actual court setting, it’s still enormously frustrating having to deal with people who are professionals, but don’t act in the upstanding way you generally expect from professionals. And for these habitual liars/bullies/whatevers, people just kind of roll with it, even if they’re just spouting out nonsense. “Oh, that’s just Bob, being Bob.” And the good guys get ignored, and people allow Bob to be a jerk, and reward him for being a jerk for giving him his way. But if the honorable and honest individual was to lie to the judge or the mediator about a certain subject— oh, how people would come unglued!
I had noticed that a bit in family situations— the “good” kid versus the “bad” kid. For the good kid, you have expectations, and for him to stray from the “good kid path” is a terrible thing. But for the bad kid, if he makes trouble or does wrong, so many people are willing to say, “Oh, boys will be boys” or “He’ll grow out of it someday” or whatever platitude excuses the bad behavior.
Since I have a Catholic worldview, I have my own opinion about why it’s bad for a good person to step from the path— but just talking about The World, why is Society reluctant to hold people accountable for unscrupulous behavior, even in a situation when individuals are in an authority position over the wrongdoer? Is it just a path-of-least-resistance thing, or…? And if that’s the case, why are there two different codes of conduct-- one code for “nice people” and a different code for people you wouldn’t trust with your grandmother?