Advice about relationship with dad

[deutsch1997bw]

I need some advice on my relationship with my dad. I love my father dearly, but it is getting to the point where everything that he says or does bothers me. We do have differing opinions on many topics, but I don’t think that this is the source of the tension. I feel as though I am trying to communicate with my dad about common interests, but he just does not reciprocate. If I ask him a question, his response is always very basic, e.g., yes, no, alright. In other words, there is no depth to our relationship. Because of this, I feel as though everything he does bugs me in some way. Any advice is appreciated.

 

[joeybaggz]

I need some advice on my relationship with my dad. I love my father dearly, but it is getting to the point where everything that he says or does bothers me. We do have differing opinions on many topics, but I don’t think that this is the source of the tension. I feel as though I am trying to communicate with my dad about common interests, but he just does not reciprocate. If I ask him a question, his response is always very basic, e.g., yes, no, alright. In other words, there is no depth to our relationship. Because of this, I feel as though everything he does bugs me in some way. Any advice is appreciated.

The fourth commandment demands that one “honors” a parent. It does not command one to like, agree, obey (if what is demanded is illegal, immoral, unethical), communicate, be accommodating in case of abuse etc., or even love the parent. The only person’s behavior one can control in a situation like yours is their own.

I’d suggest you honor him, be kind to him, and remove yourself from his orbit if and when his behavior becomes objectionable or intolerable.

Lincoln once said, “most people are as happy as they make up their minds to be”. If you choose to let his behavior control your life and happiness, that is your choice. Understand that.

Good luck.

Shalom

 

[phil_at_dayboro]

It’s tough when this happens , maybe he once had a little girl that needed him,
Now there is a grown up women that he struggles to communicate with,
Perhaps you need to change the approach ,
Not sure how to change the approach,might be something to think about,

 

[angell1]

I need some advice on my relationship with my dad. I love my father dearly, but it is getting to the point where everything that he says or does bothers me. We do have differing opinions on many topics, but I don’t think that this is the source of the tension. I feel as though I am trying to communicate with my dad about common interests, but he just does not reciprocate. If I ask him a question, his response is always very basic, e.g., yes, no, alright. In other words, there is no depth to our relationship. Because of this, I feel as though everything he does bugs me in some way. Any advice is appreciated.

was he always like this? is this a new thing?

just try your best, but in some cases, you jus tmight not be close. I’ve come to accept this from my own family as well

 

[CountrySteve]

was he always like this? is this a new thing?

just try your best, but in some cases, you jus tmight not be close. I’ve come to accept this from my own family as well

Same

To the OP:

There is hope though. I cannot comment on the specifics of your situation, but there is always the possibility of your father taking a renewed interest in you. With persistence, what you are doing can work.
Is it also possible that your father is suffering from depression?

You all will be in my prayers.

Steve

 

[ffg]

2 thoughts:

If they are together, talk to your Mom about it.

On a Friday (the day most people are most relaxed) tell him you want to discuss some things at a deeper level.

See what happens.