Advice about the 3rd shift and family

[wifeNmom.02]

My husband is starting the 3rd shift and I would really appreciate if any of you have had to work with these hours and around your family and how best to work with the 2 days a week when your off work.
Thanks and God Bless!!

 

[otm]

It takes a while to adjust the sleep patterns. Patince is certainly helpful, not only on his part, but every one else’s. You all will need to expiriment as to what works best.

 

[mimi4]

My Husband and I have been married over ten years. In that time he has worked 8pm to 7am all but 18 months. He worked 7 days on 7 days off for a few years and now he works 4 ten hour nights and is off 3. It took me a while to adjust to how tired he can get at times, but he is less stressed because he works alone most of the time. Hes a catscan tech in a hosp. No managers or supervisors hovering. What we most like is that he is here for breakfast and dinner. He comes home and fixes the kids breakfast and stays up a little while to wind down. Then he’s up in the late afternoon and we all eat dinner together every night. My kids are lucky because they see Dad a whole lot more than most kids do. The time he worked 1pm-9pm. We hated it. He was never here for dinner and usually slept thru breakfast from staying up too late at night from being wired from work. It takes time for the body to adjust and it is not for everyone. It definitely takes a certain person to do it. I worked this shift only a few times when I still worked and I hated it. I would not do it again. But for our family we love it. I love having dinner every night together and he helps to get them to bed also. Regarding days off… He will need to figure out how much rest to get on his first day off and try to keep the next as “normal” as possible. Naps are important. My husband falls asleep on the couch alot, but he’s always available to help out if I really need him. Hope this helps

 

[StephanieC]

My husband works 7pm - 7am, at least 3 days per week. Add commuting time & he leaves the house at 6pm and is coming through the door at about 8:15 in the morning.

It’s been about 5 months of permanent nights–before, he worked a rotating schedule, which was just terrible for his body clock. He’s always been a night owl; this really does suit him better.

I’ll be honest & say that initially, I hated it. I missed him at night, and was up till the wee hours several times, just trying to settle myself in. It’s gotten better. We had a baby in December, so there always seems to be a light on in our house these days!

I do miss our “normal schedule” life together, but I’m grateful for my husband’s sacrifices, and try to see the positives. It really has made our overlapping awake time more special.

Some things that seem to work for us:
–He stays on a night schedule as much as possible on his days off; naps are good
–I try to be up and fixing breakfast for him in the am, so he can go right to bed
–We both appreciate having the queen sized bed all to ourselves now!
–We attend either the vigil Mass together, or the late Mass on Sunday, and this Lent, have been able to go to the 8:30am Daily Mass together (our church is within walking distance).

I’ll be curious to read other posts, as we’re still adjusting!

 

[AirForceMama]

Last year my husband switched to the night shift, working 11pm to 7am (before he joined the military). I was hesitiant at first, but it enabled us to not have to put our newborn in daycare. He watched the baby during the day, and I had him all night. Since we had our evenings together, he went to work just as I was going to bed. It was a little lonely at first, having the bed to myself, but then I got used to it and enjoyed all the room!!

Just remember that you still need to have all the time together, as you did when he wasn’t the later nights. It may mean that you will need to adjust your sleep pattern a little to accomodate this time shift. It will work out, just keep the communication open about how you feel. There will most likey be a lot of changes coming up, so be sure you two are on the same page.

 

[WICatholic]

Everything the previous posts have said gives some very good tips. I worked that shift for most of my adult life for many of the same reasons they have said.

When first married we BOTH worked it and just turned our lives around to fit it… we stayed up til noon, got up by seven or eight or so, and then to work. Note, the same hours as if we worked day shift, but 12 hours later.

As the children came, he went on days, I stayed on nights, we never needed a baby sitter. I napped with them til they were in school, had supper and then napped again before work. Tried second shift for awhile, and that required a sitter for two hours on the days I worked, but did not work. I never was able to do anything with the extended family/friends, etc, though body wise (they called it circadia (sp) rhythm) it was perfect for me, but has never been best for family.

After I was alone raising our children, Night shift and weekends meant that I could fit my sleeping into the children’s schedules. If they had MD or DDS app’t, school events, etc, I could rearrange my sleep as needed for that day in order to take them to the app’ts or attend events, depending on during or after school, or evenings.

I still prefer that shift, as less bosses, less hassle, more responsibility (nurse) AND I can be available for my kids and grandkids the same way I always was. I would prefer to work three 12 hour shifts a week, but cannot always get that.

As for days off… it all depends on what is going on. If there is something I need to do in the AM, I stay up. If something to do in the evening, I go to bed soon after coming home, but am usually up til about nine or ten regardless, unwinding. I NOW work second and third (often in the same week) as I do agency nursing. It frees me to be off when I want to be off, and has many advantages that I did not have before. The drawback is occasionally being cancelled at last moments, and the varying shifts.

You will adjust as long as you remember that there are BENEFITS to this shift, and don’t look at JUST the negatives!!

 

[JCPhoenix]

I used to work nights 8pm to 7 am for nearly 4 years.

I am not married, but there were those on my shift who were.

For myself, I couldn’t get any quality sleep for the entire 4 years and I was miserable. And especially in the winter, I craved the light! So on my 3 day weekends (10 hours / day for 4 days lends to 3 day weekends), I would maybe sleep for a few hours then get up and inhale coffee. I’d be able to sleep then throughout the next nigth. On my day back, I 'd sleep the night before, get up, run errands, etc., then sleep in the afternoon. Often I’d have to take melatonin or Nyquil or something to help me sleep.

My co-workers actuallly kept to the night schedule more or less on their weekends because it worked for them, but I believe that was harder on their families.

We all had to deal with occasionally having to stay up or not get any sleep at all due to the obligations of the rest of the world requiring our presence.

 

[TheGarg]

wifeNmom.02:

My husband is starting the 3rd shift and I would really appreciate if any of you have had to work with these hours and around your family and how best to work with the 2 days a week when your off work.
Thanks and God Bless!!

well, personally whether your working 3rd or 1st is indifferent, since your either working or sleeping either way, the rough part is I personally stay up on fridays and interact with my family and friends…so thatis one long day…[sleep like a baby friday night lol], then then i sleep saturday night and before work on sunday night i take a 3 or 4 hour nap to make it through the night, so sunday is kinda of a long day, but the nap helps immensley…leave you a little tired but gives you maximum fam time…this has always worked out best for me…

 

[TheGarg]

mimi4:

The time he worked 1pm-9pm. We hated it. He was never here for dinner and usually slept thru breakfast from staying up too late at night from being wired from work.

AGREED, 2nd shift is the worst shift by far, for a family man…period.

that is what we call the drinking shift.