Advice needed........maybe

[Luvz2travel]

I think it is a family thing/personal opinion thing. I always though it would be an insult to me if a man wanted my dad’s approval. After isn’t MY approval the one that matters?

It’s not about that. I was raised with a more traditional view of family but also raised to educate and support myself and always have. I never asked my dad for money after the age of 14 and bought all my own clothes and school lunches (my family was poor) but to this day if my dad says something or asks me to do something I do it out of respect for the fact that he is my father. Out of respect for me as an adult he would never order me to do anything but might suggest something. Either way he’s the only man I would ever give that perrogative to since he’s my father. I have a very good relationship with my dad as he does with all his kids. I was very lucky in that not everyone is and some parents will try to overparent. Mine never did. Anyway I look at it as a respect thing but I would tell any guy this. It’s sort of like your dad giving you a way it’s tradition.

 

[fastenatingguy]

So, in conclusion, there was no engagement. Therefore, no need for “the talk”.

Somewhat related, my 18 year old son (who just completed his first semester at the University of Kansas) mentioned to his family at the Christmas dinner “when I get married, she has to be a Jayhawk fan…” His real point was his school pride and that it would be easier to have a spouse with a strong common (fanatical ) interest or bond.

So I followed up with “does she have to be Catholic?” and he said “I guess so”. Since I had opened pandora’s box, the whole family good-naturedly teased him about this “future event” (since he is currently not seeking a girlfriend). The conversation continued to develop and we all had a few chuckles. Finally his sister said “don’t forget that even if she loves you and somehow agrees to marry you (teasingly), you still have to talk with her parents…”

I smiled.

 

[pianistclare]

So, in conclusion, there was no engagement. Therefore, no need for “the talk”.

Somewhat related, my 18 year old son (who just completed his first semester at the University of Kansas) mentioned to his family at the Christmas dinner “when I get married, she has to be a Jayhawk fan…” His real point was his school pride and that it would be easier to have a spouse with a strong common (fanatical ) interest or bond.

So I followed up with “does she have to be Catholic?” and he said “I guess so”. Since I had opened pandora’s box, the whole family good-naturedly teased him about this “future event” (since he is currently not seeking a girlfriend). The conversation continued to develop and we all had a few chuckles. Finally his sister said “don’t forget that even if she loves you and somehow agrees to marry you (teasingly), you still have to talk with her parents…”

I smiled.