Advice on my 16 year old's catholic education

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Well- just a quick update. I’ve been doing things here and there with my son and tonight, as he was working on his homework- I sat on my own in my room feeling very discouraged and small. Scary to think that I’m supposed to be his teacher- I’m supposed to lead him to God yet I know sooo little, and am so full of doubts and questions myself. So I asked God to guide me- and to show me where I should start. I decided to start with the Gospel of Mattew- and thought I would briefly educate him on the genealogy and covenant made with Abram- and David (things I only recently learned doing an online bible study on the Gospel of St John- and a study I’m currently doing on Our Lady. Funny thing is- he already knew it from last year! Haha! He had learned it in grade 9, his then religion teacher was just amazing. So- we covered that- and the first 2 chapters. He learned- and I gained some much needed peace! We’re going to be ok! We have decided together, that every night, for at least 15 to 20 minutes- we will read the bible together. We’ll help each other understand it’s passages and grow together:)

Many thanks to all of you. Last week we watched a video on a priest’s vocation story that was JUST AMAZING (someone recommended it above)- truly inspirational. And today- after attending my first of many weekday morning masses- I got a call from my church from a lady who organizes various groups and volunteer oportunities and we’re jumping on the band wagon! My son is thrilled to start volunteering for their youth group- he’ll be one of the teen leaders helping them organize the activities for the kids in the group (grades 4 to 8) and we’ll both be putting our names down to help with some missions they have going on for the poor in our community (such as preparing meals and such). I am over the moon happy, and so looking forward to this journey we are embarking on!

God bless you:)
 
His_helpmeet said:
As a teen, my mother used “A Course in Religion for High School Youth”, by Fr. John Laux. This series contains four books - Chief Truths of the Faith, The Mass and the Sacraments, Catholic Morality, and Catholic Apologetics - as well as two companion books, Introduction to the Bible and Church History. (I was only educated using the first three books.) These books are published by TAN. You can order them online.
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You can get a set of course plans through Kolbe Academy that uses these books and ties them with the bible and the catechism. They are excellent. wwww.kolbe.org.

Also, there are many Catholic youth camps. There is an excellent Apologetics camp run by Envoy in NC, a Camp Wojtyla in Colorado, and Camp Veritas in New York. Catholic colleges also have their own camps that give instruction, introduce the kids to other Catholic teens, and serve as college visits. Check into Christendom College, University of Dallas, Saint Vincent College.

For something super easy and inexpensive, check into Lighthouse Catholic Media. They produce CD’s that run about a half hour in length on a variety of topics. They are three dollars each. You can join a CD of the month club or find a parish that has a kiosk to buy from directly. There are so many titles. Some are personal stories of conversion or sustained faith. Some are more instructional in nature. I haven’t heard one yet that I didn’t like.

Good luck to you!
 
To OP:

What was it that caused you to be away from faith for a long time as you mention in your first post? Perhaps think back to that and what you would have changed that you would not have been away…maybe work in that area with your son?

I come from a family of 5 and we all went to all public school. All of my siblings are currently married with kids and practicing. I attribute to my parents being strict about our faith…but I know that sometimes that can turn people away. My wife’s brother and sister both went to Catholic school and Catholic high school, but neither of them practice and are far, far away from the Church. I always wondered what the key piece that led two the two different outcomes.

I applaud your seeking out advice. I will listen as I have 5 kids of my own as well.
 
HouseArrest said:
You can get a set of course plans through Kolbe Academy that uses these books and ties them with the bible and the catechism. They are excellent. wwww.kolbe.org.

Also, there are many Catholic youth camps. There is an excellent Apologetics camp run by Envoy in NC, a Camp Wojtyla in Colorado, and Camp Veritas in New York. Catholic colleges also have their own camps that give instruction, introduce the kids to other Catholic teens, and serve as college visits. Check into Christendom College, University of Dallas, Saint Vincent College.

For something super easy and inexpensive, check into Lighthouse Catholic Media. They produce CD’s that run about a half hour in length on a variety of topics. They are three dollars each. You can join a CD of the month club or find a parish that has a kiosk to buy from directly. There are so many titles. Some are personal stories of conversion or sustained faith. Some are more instructional in nature. I haven’t heard one yet that I didn’t like.

Good luck to you!
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I’ll definitely look into all of these, thank you so much:)
 
barhoram said:
To OP:

What was it that caused you to be away from faith for a long time as you mention in your first post? Perhaps think back to that and what you would have changed that you would not have been away…maybe work in that area with your son?

I come from a family of 5 and we all went to all public school. All of my siblings are currently married with kids and practicing. I attribute to my parents being strict about our faith…but I know that sometimes that can turn people away. My wife’s brother and sister both went to Catholic school and Catholic high school, but neither of them practice and are far, far away from the Church. I always wondered what the key piece that led two the two different outcomes.

I applaud your seeking out advice. I will listen as I have 5 kids of my own as well.
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That’s an interesting question. I was raised by catholic parents- I thought they were the most devout people I had ever known. God was central in all the advice they gave us. All 4 kids (my siblings and I) went to catholic schools, and we were front and center at every mass (it was not to be debated- there was no opting out in our home). My father is a really, really special person. He and a few people on his side of the family have had huge spiritual experiences and so my parents tried as hard as they could to keep us on the right path.

I grew up believing in God- there was no doubt- but it all started to change in my teen years. I left my parents home at 19 and moved to Toronto with a friend (over 1000 miles from home) and church fell off my radar. It was a drag- and uncool… and you know- I know God so that’s all that matters. My catholic faith eventually morphed into a whole new religion… a very liberal one… yet I still considered myself a catholic. It wasn’t until 5 or 6 years ago when going through some stuff that I realized how lost I was.

Sorry- I’m babbling on. Quite honestly- I can’t be sure. Can anyone? My parents were very devout, they did everything they could have done. If I had to guess- if we had it to do over- I think incorporating the bible would have helped? The things I am learning about catholicism today are different from what I grew up believing. It was much more liberal back then- there were a lot of grey areas. Now- I am seeing a much more black and white image. I understand there are grey areas for many people- and I am tolerant of that, obviously, but the catholicism I follow today is much more deeply rooted in scripture. I understand a lot more now because I am studying the bible.

I dunno- I guess- after writing it all out- I think the bible has to be made more central- as well as confession, church and daily prayer?

In the end- your guess is as good as mine. My parents are AMAZING people- if they couldn’t do it perfectly- I wonder if anyone out there can! Haha
 
I would advise that you think about the desired outcome of these extra activities. What precisely do you want him to do that didn’t happen for you? Do you want him to just stay Catholic? Engage in mostly Catholic activities? None of that is guaranteed, no matter which activities you place him in.

Also consider that by 16, he’s at a developmental stage where it’s healthy for him to push back/rebel against ideas and activities parents push on him. Trying to force him closer to the Church, or dictate activities for him, is more likely to have a negative effect on his relationship with the faith.
 
historygirl80 said:
I would advise that you think about the desired outcome of these extra activities. What precisely do you want him to do that didn’t happen for you? Do you want him to just stay Catholic? Engage in mostly Catholic activities? None of that is guaranteed, no matter which activities you place him in.

Also consider that by 16, he’s at a developmental stage where it’s healthy for him to push back/rebel against ideas and activities parents push on him. Trying to force him closer to the Church, or dictate activities for him, is more likely to have a negative effect on his relationship with the faith.
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I think what I’m wanting for him is more than I had (obviously- I think it’s what most parents want for their kids). My parents were great at teaching us the basics of catholicism, but the more I learn today, the more I realize that it was very lax… although I felt it was very strict growing up. I’m trying to do what my parents did, in keeping God at the Centre of everything he does every day. I’m trying to encourage him to think before he acts “what would Jesus want of you”. A major part of what I think was lacking in my childhood was the reading of the Bible… so I’m making that a daily thing we do together at the end of most days. We read a few chapters together in the gospels ans discuss them as we go through. I encourage him to pray for n people around him that need it.
I know there will come a time when he pushes back and I won’t be able to control his actions, but so far so good… I haven’t overdone it because he isn’t complaining. He got started with the youth group at our church last night, he’s one of the teen leaders. It’s mainly to gain him some volunteering hours, but I hope it encourages him to stay connected within the church. We’re also going to be looking into volunteering oportunities in our community to help those around us that are in need.

I guess I just want to encourage him, I want him to have a strong catholic base to help him cope through the difficult years ahead. I’m still learning so much, I wish I had started earlier… especially with him
 
My son is in LifeTeen. If your parish does not have one, I am sure others do. Our formal REC stops after Comfirmation but then goes into Life Teen. There are also so great on-line religious Ed courses for high schoolers. They are taught in the vain of cyber school. St Maximilion Kolbe cyber school comes to mind.

I can round up others.
 
Check out the stuff from Ignatius Press -they have some good Faith formation materials
 
 
I’be never actually heard of religious courses through the church- mind you I was never part of youth groups- and clearly never asked. After having taken part in my first one last night with my son (well- I only watched- he took part)… I wish I had put him in earlier.

I wish a lot of things though… don’t we all. The truth is, I couldn’t ask for a better son. All I can do now is be the best mom I can be to help make sure that spark inside of him stays lit.
 
Regina7 said:
My parish, and every parish I can think of near me, stops religious ed in 8th grade, which is confirmation year.
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That’s really unfortunate. and not what the Bishops recommend.
Everyplace around here goes on through High School.
They have several approved High School curriculums that Pastors can choose from.
WE confirm in the 10th grade for exactly the reason of keeping teens in formation.
Then we start with young adult ministry.
 
pianistclare said:
That’s really unfortunate. and not what the Bishops recommend.
Everyplace around here goes on through High School.
They have several approved High School curriculums that Pastors can choose from.
WE confirm in the 10th grade for exactly the reason of keeping teens in formation.
Then we start with young adult ministry.
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I agree- it’s very unfortunate. We do have great youth groups for our high schoolers, and they do learn, but it’s not the same as RE instruction. I don’t know why our bishop said confirmation should be 8th grade. I think high school is more appropriate, but there’s not much I can do about that.
 
Regina7 said:
I agree- it’s very unfortunate. We do have great youth groups for our high schoolers, and they do learn, but it’s not the same as RE instruction. I don’t know why our bishop said confirmation should be 8th grade. I think high school is more appropriate, but there’s not much I can do about that.
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Youth group IS RE.
IT’s just not sitting at desks taking turns reading aloud. Studies show that teens and middles schoolers zone out with that model.
OUr Youth Group (LifeTeen) is full of dogma, tradition, Adoration, Scripture and community service.
If you don’t have one…offer to start one. There has to be other parents who feel the same way. The Faith Formation Dept of your Chancery will help you if you ask.
Good luck!
 
pianistclare said:
Youth group IS RE.
IT’s just not sitting at desks taking turns reading aloud. Studies show that teens and middles schoolers zone out with that model.
OUr Youth Group (LifeTeen) is full of dogma, tradition, Adoration, Scripture and community service.
If you don’t have one…offer to start one. There has to be other parents who feel the same way. The Faith Formation Dept of your Chancery will help you if you ask.
Good luck!
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Ok, then I guess we do have RE for high schoolers. They have some sort of activity each week. The next one is a visit to one of the Holy Doors. They also went to World YouthDay. I guess I forget that kids can learn without sitting at a desk. 😊
 
Regina7 said:
Ok, then I guess we do have RE for high schoolers. They have some sort of activity each week. The next one is a visit to one of the Holy Doors. They also went to World YouthDay. I guess I forget that kids can learn without sitting at a desk. 😊
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Well, the tend to NOT zone out when they can move about and speak freely. Sounds great, actually. 😉
 
Our religious Ed classes stop at sixth grade, when they receive Confirmation. They have Edge and Youth Group, but honestly, they don’t learn nearly as much about the faith as they should. So, while DS is home-schooled, he is also home-schooled using the appropriate grade level books if he were in Catholic school.

Thankfully, he goes to an orthodox Catholic high school next year where he will pick up where we let off. Sadly, most kids thing he is goofy for loving his faith. Why do so many people think that if you are gifted in science it makes you an agnostic or worse.
 
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