Advice on waiting

[Arwen037]

Is there ever too long to wait for a guy you like? Even if it means passing up oppritunities that would have been perfectly acceptable before? I’ve very strongly liked a guy for about a year and a half now, for the first bit he had a gf, and since January he’s been on a “who am I, and what do I believe” kick and he feels a gf would complicate that. Do I continue to wait, or do I give up? Just looking for some opinions.

 

[gmarie21]

Live your life. He may be the one you marry, he may not be. Don’t put your life on hold, passing up other opportunities to meet other people, in the hopes that he may one day feel the same for you. Give him his space. If he doesn’t want to date anyone, that’s okay, if he wants to date someone else, that’s okay. I had a frienship like this once and about a year or so into it I would play the Bonnie Raite song “I can’t make you love me” just to remind myself that while I may have thought we’d be great together (b/c we were best friends) his actions and language were such that he didn’t feel the same.

 

[Veritas41]

Is there ever too long to wait for a guy you like? Even if it means passing up oppritunities that would have been perfectly acceptable before? I’ve very strongly liked a guy for about a year and a half now, for the first bit he had a gf, and since January he’s been on a “who am I, and what do I believe” kick and he feels a gf would complicate that. Do I continue to wait, or do I give up? Just looking for some opinions.

God knows – offer this up in prayer to Him.

 

[SMHW]

The advice to ‘live your life’ is good for a number of reasons.

Consider that it may be in God’s plan for you to do some personal growing before you are a suitable partner for this guy. If you spend to much time and energy waiting for him (and waiting does use up time and energy) then you may miss some of the things you need to do to prepare for your future life, whether it includes this fellow or not.

 

[Robaynne]

First of all has this guy given you any indication or sign that he is interested in you. What makes you think that you guys could even have a relationship. Are you guys friends or more than friends has something happened between you guys that makes you want to wait for him.

If not then why are you waiting for him and putting your life on hold for some guy that one day may never be yours. And what if you guys do hook up and he is not for you.

Don’t put your life on hold for anybody that would not do the same for you. Pray to God and ask him for guidance. And he will give it to you. Don’t let opportunities pass you by.

Life does go on so live it. God has a plan for you that is why I think you are now questioning things. That maybe a part of you feels that you wasted your time. If you feel it is time to let go then do so. If he is interested and really interested them he will make a move.

Goodluck and I wish you all the best in making the right decision.

 

[OldAgeGuru]

OK as a 26 year old if I had a dollar for everytime a guy gave me a baloney line like thatI would have enough money to take a nice vacation.

The book He’s just not that into you, is like a light shining. There’s a lot of references to sex and other stuff, but, the gist of it is, that this guy doesn’t understand why smart, funny, beautiful, educated, ambitious women, will sit around waiting for a guy to call. Go out, do your own thing. Guys find ambition either completely a turn on, or off, and in my experience, you don’t really want to date the guy who finds it a turn off.

 

[jrabs]

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The book He’s just not that into you, is like a light shining. There’s a lot of references to sex and other stuff, but, the gist of it is, that this guy doesn’t understand why smart, funny, beautiful, educated, ambitious women, will sit around waiting for a guy to call. Go out, do your own thing. Guys find ambition either completely a turn on, or off, and in my experience, you don’t really want to date the guy who finds it a turn off.

Oh yeah baby! I second this book for every single woman. This book will help put the dating scene in perspective. - Any man that is completely interested in you will absolutely make time for a call, a quick visit, and even make up ridiculous excuses to call you or see you.

Believe me - once you read this book, it helps make dating decisions so much easier. You are worth effort.

Love love love the book.

 

[1ke]

If you aren’t married to him, you owe him nothing as far as “waiting” for him.

First, he has not asked you to do so.

Second, he has not given any indication of returning your affection.

You should not wait on a man with whom you have no committment. Ground your decisions in reality, not in “what if”.

I recommend the book “Date or Soul Mate” by Neil Clark Warren. It’s an excellent book on how to prepare yourself to meet the right person, and what to look for in the right person.

As another stated-- if he hasn’t asked you out… he’s just not in to you. That is a very true statement. My philosophy of men is summed up this way:

Men spend time and money on the things they want to spend time and money on. They find a way– whether it’s golf, electronics, or a girlfriend. Their money and time will go where they are interested… so, I think you have your answer.

 

[jrabs]

As another stated-- if he hasn’t asked you out… he’s just not in to you. That is a very true statement. My philosophy of men is summed up this way:

Men spend time and money on the things they want to spend time and money on. They find a way– whether it’s golf, electronics, or a girlfriend. Their money and time will go where they are interested… so, I think you have your answer.

Yep yep yep - now that’s what I’m saying.

No matter what you are feeling for him, the feelings are NOT reciprocated and will not be. Though that may be hurtful to realize, it can also be empowering. There is someone far better in store for you who will go out of his way to see you.

And THAT is the truth.