Thank you everyone—wonderful advice! I probably did put this post in the wrong place. Sorry!
I appreciate you reading my post & responding with loving advice.
I need to get to church, its been years since Ive been. I know that getting things back into perspective will help me see my problems differently & maybe clear up a few…
I am definetly lonely right now & am expecting my husband to fill that void, in fact I expect him to fill all voids in my life right now. I used to be an independent fun-loving girl, but not anymore…
We moved to NC 5 years ago, we had established new friendships & just started a family. Within the last two years, most of my friends have moved away & some of the couples we became close to have divorced. My mom lives nearby which helps, but her company isnt always rose-colored & I need friends…
I miss my friends. I miss being close to the rest of my family! I just feel stuck right now! I express these concerns to my husband & he tells me that nothing will make me happy? He is generally an upbeat - happy person,so he doesnt understand my lonliness right now…
I’m glad for yout that you are considering coming back to Church.
Have a look at what is going on in your Parish, there’s usually lots for mothers to do with their children, toddler and youth groups etc. The kids can play and make little friends and you’ll get a chance to meet and make friends with other mothers and fathers. It is as important for you to socialise with other adults as it is for your children to socialise with other children.
Having children can be a very isolating experience for mothers. The fathers tend to go out to work and they keep contact with the world outside the four walls of the home, but for mothers the world gets very small. Sometimes this isolation can lead to depression or a deep loss of motivation. This isolation can also lead to lack of confidence and loneliness and a huge number of mothers go through this. The mothers love their children but a two year olds conversation is not the same nor fulfills in the same way as adult company. The company of a child fulfills the parent in a very different way.
You might like to consider taking an inexpensive ten week course at a nearby educational centre or community project (depending on income, some are free). Most run daytime courses with creche facilities. They have courses on many subjects, such as painting, creative writing, computer skills, etc. It is possible to telephone them and ask for a prospectus so you can see what is on offer and what you may have an interest in. Most of these courses are taken up by people in a very similar situation as yourself.
If your mother lives nearby another option is to ask her to watch your child while you go for one morning or afternoon a week and do some voluntary work. Have a look at what organisations are in your area and choose something that takes your interest, such as Animal Shelters, Homeless Shelters, Scout groups, various charities etc. I’m sure your mother would love the opportunity to spend time alone with your little one and it will create an even closer bond of love between her and your child and if you find her company difficult it may perhaps give you two some common talking ground on what her and her grandchild have done together in your absence.
Unless you homeschool, children are only with their mothers in this high intensity (name removed by moderator)ut for a very short period of time and once they do go to school it can be a very lonely experience for a mother who has not taken steps to break her isolation prior to them attending school.
Everyone needs a break whatever their vocation in life. And that short break of one morning a week can create an opportunity for making acquaintances and friends and that short break will refresh the mother to make the most of the precious time with her children before they start school.
I would like to applaud you for stayng at home with your child. You are most needed by your little one at this age and the bonds of love made now will last forever and serve your child with good foundations for the future because the one who loves him/her the most has invested their time, attention and love in him/her whilst very small. You will find that once your child starts school they will be very secure and happy in the knowledge of your love. You are doing a fine job.
Consider going back to the faith, consider the course and/or the voluntary work, talk it over with your husband and your mother and I wish your family the very best and will keep you always in my prayers.
The Peace and Joy of Christ to you and yours.
