Afraid of Natural family planning methods

[srichey73]

Hello. I haven’t posted before but though this would be a good avenue for some advice. My husband and I have 2 wonderful children - age 6 and almost 1yr. I also have three angel babies in heaven (2 miscarriages and 1 stillbirth). We have used contraceptives in the past (birth control pills and condoms), but we feel that this is not the Catholic way. I recently purchased a fertility monitor to help with the natural family planning methods, but I’m afraid that the method will fail and I will become pregnant again. I’m almost 36 and my last pregnacy was really hard on my physically and emotionally. We are so blessed our son (1yr old) is here with us. Am I wrong to have these feelings? Any advice/comments would be appreicated.

 

[wanner47]

Have you taken an NFP class? Do you have “The Art of Natural Family Planning” by John Kipley? I highly recommend both, if not. See www.ccli.org or www.omsoul.com to find NFP instructors.

What, specifically, are your concerns? Have you ever charted before?

 

[faithconcerns]

I understand your fears. I advise you to study the science behind the methods and the statistics, too. When properly learned and used the method failure rate is much lower that artificial forms of birth control. Additionally, read Humanae Vitae to truly understand the importance of following the churches direction in this area. Then, pray, pray, pray. God will give you the confidence and the courage. Ultimately, it is His plan, we just have to do our best to work in cooperation with Him, not frustrate His plan. I know many people who approached NFP very cautiously for a wide variety of reasons; family history of genetic syndromes, taking medication that could cause deformities, severe money problems. God will give you the wisdom and strength to use the method. Those people now embrace the method and what it has done for their marriages and families. God bless.

 

[1ke]

You are likely fearful because you don’t know anything about natural family planning.

Take a class in one of the main methods:

Sympto Thermal (Couple to Couple League or Northwest Family Services or NFPandMore.org)

Creighton Model

Billings Model

Marquette Model (uses a fertility monitor and Creighton observations)

Google these and you will find TONS of information

 

[taye]

I would strongly advise buying The Art of Natural Family planning from ccli.org. The authors recommend using the sympto-thermal method which uses both temperature and mucus charting to determine the fertile period. Using this method, as well as adding a day or two extra of abstinence before and after the ovulation will also help you to avoid pregnancy. Also, CAF has a group formed called TTA (trying to abstain) where you can look for more help and support.

It certainly isn’t easy to do things God’s way, and I can attest myself to having been tempted to use unnatural methods. Our marriage was, back then, in a bad state, but if we resorted to using ABC, I know we would have been WAY worse. NFP has helped us through the difficult times. Strangely, we experience a “honeymoon” every month and I wish that all couples could understand that abstinence does help bond a couple, even if it sounds kinda ironic.

I will hold you in my prayers, and hope that your fears subside. In the meantime, educate, educate, educate! And pray!

 

[msugeotech]

Don’t be.

My wife and I were “scared” at first too, when we converted. We signed up and took a class - the Billings Method (or you may see it as BOM for Billings Ovulation Method). We also bought the ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor to compare what my wife was observing vs. what the monitor said, and we are VERY comfortable in our use of NFP.

Both of you (there’s 2 of you in this, don’t forget) have to educate yourself, read, take a class, whatever you need to do. Be prepared and willing to abstain while you’re trying to figure things out, but don’t be afraid - you can do it.

 

[2HunnyBuns]

I’m essentially in the same boat as you, only I have a dh who is totally not on board with NFP. So far, I have been unable to convince him to take a NFP class with me, so I’m going to do the Couple to Couple League’s home study course on my own. I’ve actually been charting for a few months now and have a pretty good understanding of the basic concepts, I just need to take a class so we can use this method successfully in TTA.

 

[taye]

TTA (trying to abstain)

Oops! That’s what happens when you try to make dinner and type at the same time.

TTA = Trying to avoid. Well, I guess that does involve abstinence, so at least I’m partly right!

 

[tinalewis]

I was afraid, too. I have a heart condition plus I’m old so pregnancy isn’t advisable.

But I remember how I felt after a couple of months of using NFP - confident and powerful in a way I never had felt before.

What’s scary is the pharmaceuticals that we put into our bodies. If you want to be scared of something, be scared of that.