Am I barred from the Priesthood?

[jkobs1]

Well, I don’t know how to start. So I’ll just let it out: I’m 19 years old and for nearly a year now I have discerned about joing the Holy Priesthood. But unfortunately, things have come up in my life by my own selfish doing in which make my strongly questions whether that would be possible due to my past consequential actions. And what I’m talking about is that I have been addicted to porn ever since I was 12. And out of this porn addiction, my brain has become desensitized to the point where heterosexual pornography was no longer gratifying to me and began to consume homosexual pornography. And I am well informed on the stance of homo-anything in admission to the Holy Priesthood.

This is the stance on homosexuality in admission to the priesthood as disqualifiers in the present moment from Holy Mother Church herself:

Men who are and cannot join the priesthood are those who:

1. Are 100% active homosexuals, throwing it all out there, etc.
2. People who contain homosexual tendencies/sympathy such as those who attend pride parades, frequent Gay bars, for any other reason than to protest against it, and support the gay culture/lifestyle, etc.
3. The harder-to-understams one: those whom have deep homosexual tendencies. Like someone who the bishop cant trust to remain celibate or he cannot be/act like Christ/model Christ as Groom of the Chutch, etc.

The point of what I’m typing is that I am wondering if I’m completely barred from the Holy Priesthhod due to my past actions of gay porn addiction. Be for being desensitized by pornography, I despised and was disgusted by homosexual relationships, but the psychological damage of pornography has warped my brain the be attracted to the things that I was attracted to. Pornography is a form of Political Control. If anyone tells you otherwise, they are a liar and a demon. In fact, if someone DOES tell you that, link them to this page so they can see what I went through as undeniable proof of the later.

The point being, now I don’t know if barred from the Priesthood now due to my past, regrettable actions. But there may be some light shining in this dark cave; the psychological effects of pornography are reversible! They can be cured and you can retrain your brain to go to the state it was before porn. Even if that happens, and years pass and I know longer am attracted to the things i used to be and now find those things appalling looking back from the future, would the past occurence of said act still permanently bar me from the Priesthood, even if I no longer have it? Did just put myself in a non-intentional life sentence from the priesthood due to my regrettable past sins?

 

[adamhovey1988]

First of all, you’re still young. My diocese has priests that are divorced and have children (though this is NOT the norm, and I should point out they have ADULT children). Keep in mind, you are still maturing.

 

[Lindsey2905]

I read your post with much compassion. And echo that you need to take counsel from a compassionate but wise priest
I am interested in what you were saying about pornography. I would like to hear your experience, not the graphic details of what you viewed I hasten to add, but it’s affects on you, where you got help from and from whom. What was your moment of enlightenment, and what tell tale signs would you give a mother, like myself that their sons/daughters may be falling into the seduction so freely offered on internet etc.
I’m not sure this forum is the best place to post reply but you could tell me at Lmclark571@gmail.com
Many thanks

 

[Inquiringperson]

God bless you in your discernment to the priesthood!

The best thing I can recommend would be to talk to the vocations director of your diocese or of a religious order that you’re interested in. They can best direct you from there (that is, after all, the point of a vocations director).

 

[Tis_Bearself]

I think you need to address your porn and same-sex attraction issues first and foremost. From your post, it sounds like you have at least confronted the fact that you used porn and that you have same-sex attraction, but you have made other statements that sound like you still have some things to work through. I would hope you are working on these issues with a priest and, if necessary, a mental health counselor.

The priesthood issue is a separate issue and one to be discussed with the priest with whom you’re working on your porn/ SSA issues and also with the vocations director for your area. No one on this forum can tell you whether or not you might be priesthood material.

Good luck.

 

[do_justly_love_mercy]

my brain has become desensitized to the point where heterosexual pornography was no longer gratifying to me and began to consume homosexual pornography.

As far as I am aware, no scientific investigation into the causes of homosexuality have suggested that watching heterosexual pornography can cause somebody to become homosexual. It is more likely that somebody who watches homosexual pornography does so because he is already gay or bisexual for other reasons.

Pornography is a form of Political Control.

It really isn’t. What it is, is a big business. There are some individuals and small businesses that produce pornography for artistic purposes or to satisfy their own particular sexual preferences, but most of what’s on the internet is there because it makes a lot of money.

Also, please be careful when discussing the idea that pornography is a form of political control. As far as I am aware, it is essentially an anti-Semitic conspiracy theory promoted by the likes of E. Michael Jones.

 

[Minks]

@jkobs1

First, go to your profile & type in a name that is not your own, or leave that space blank. Do that now. You don’t want this thread coming back to haunt you.

As for the problem you’ve described, you know that the only genuine answers are going to come from priests, both in your parish and in any orders which you might visit, long before you think about applying.

Call your priest. Don’t panic. Say prayers each morning and evening, as well as before and after meals. Write down a plan to change your life, and work that plan. Do a self-inventory with your written plan and with an Examination of Conscience each evening to keep you on track. You’ll need to work on this to change. You must stay on top of it. Only you can do that, nobody else.

Receive absolution frequently, in accord with your priest’s advice, and Holy Communion as often as possible. Spend time with the Blessed Sacrament in Adoration as often as possible. Bask in the love of Christ.

Don’t forget to remove your name NOW, and call your priest, or another priest today. Best wishes.

 

[Peeps]

Get some professional help from a counselor trained in addictions to overcome your addition to porn. There are practical steps to breaking an addiction, and a counselor will be able to guide you through these steps.

Certainly continue talking to a priest, praying, studying Scripture and other good books, wearing scapulars, joining confraternities, etc. I would also suggest getting involved with a mens’ group at your parish, a group that not only enjoys prayer, study, and fellowship, but more importantly, one that does physical work, perhaps helping disabled or older parishioners, or perhaps immigrants, with their house repairs or lawn work.

But addiction is a mental/emotional condition that can be treated. Please get counselling to conquer your addiction.