Am I the only single parent here?

[katybird]

Actually, I know that I am not - someone mentioned being a single mom chasing after two boys in the cleanliness thread and I had the urge to say “Hey! You, too?!”

Anyway, who else is a single parent? Are you divorced or widowed or was your child, like mine, concieved out of wedlock? (BTW, that is toatally NONE OF MY BUSINESS so please feel free to not even answer that!)

I’m just curious.

Thanks!

 

[jrabs]

Hi Katy,
I am that crazy mom chasing 2 boys from the cleanliness thread.

I was married for 10 years to a man with severe addictions and mental disorders. Thought I could “save him”, but oh goodness me, that is a bad reason to get married. I am now annulled ( God is great).

Unfortunately, this man disappeared back in March from the face of the Earth on our son’s 8th birthday. Never to be heard from again. So the boys have been without a dad.

I hope you have a good support system in family and friends that can give you a bit of a break at times - and maybe monetary help as well from time to time.

Money wise - God looked out for me because my ill husband never worked so I am used to supporting the family on my own means, as difficult as it is - at least I am used to it. I also have great parents who will help with sitters if needed.

I have read the other posts by you and it sounds like you and I have had our share of lonliness ( as many here have had)…God will bless us with supportive St Joseph type men if that is His will for us. Trust in that and stay close to God - and focus on bringing up your child with faith. It is hard to keep the lonlies at bay sometimes - but I am certain that if you and I stay close to God and listen to His will, He will bless us abundantly in whatever form that will take.

From what I have read through your posts, Katy, you seem to be a remarkably strong, smart and faithfilled woman. Your child is blessed to have such a devoted mother.

May God pour His blessing over you and your child this Advent Season. Have faith.
Jennifer

 

[BRC]

Hey “Guys”, I’m not a single parent, and I’m not a mom…but I wanted to chime in and let you know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Parenting is a tough job, and it must be doubley hard as a single mom. But remember you have a Big family in your church and faith! And we are pulling for you!

Bri

 

[mkw]

Two years ago this past June, My beloved husband died. It was our son’s 9th birthday.

Two months later, I got custody of my then 5 year old grandson.

Now, I am raising two very active boys. They both are in much emotional pain.

Being a single parent is THE toughed job in the world. What absolutly BLOWS MY MIND is that there are women who CHOOSE to be single parents from the beginning.

I find strength knowing our Blessed Mother was a single parent after the death of St. Joseph and my patron saint St. Monica. I am also sure that God grants single parents, either due to death or divorce, special graces to endure the double role we all now have to perform.

 

[jrabs]

mkw:

Two years ago this past June, My beloved husband died. It was our son’s 9th birthday.

Two months later, I got custody of my then 5 year old grandson.

Now, I am raising two very active boys. They both are in much emotional pain.

Being a single parent is THE toughed job in the world. What absolutly BLOWS MY MIND is that there are women who CHOOSE to be single parents from the beginning.

I find strength knowing our Blessed Mother was a single parent after the death of St. Joseph and my patron saint St. Monica. I am also sure that God grants single parents, either due to death or divorce, special graces to endure the double role we all now have to perform.

You will be in my prayers.

 

[jrabs]

BRC:

Hey “Guys”, I’m not a single parent, and I’m not a mom…but I wanted to chime in and let you know you are in my thoughts and prayers. Parenting is a tough job, and it must be doubley hard as a single mom. But remember you have a Big family in your church and faith! And we are pulling for you!

Bri

Thanks so much for the prayers and support.

 

[Shiann]

I am a single parent too, to an active, and independent 8 year old who is the light of my life here on earth.

I too, katybird, had her out of wedlock. I was abandoned by the man when I was 6 months pregnant.

I think it would be tougher to be a single parent when one has been married for a long time. I think widowed or divorced single parents have an enormous amount of stress that I just don’t have.

I have never relied on someone to bring in part or all of the household income, and then lost it suddenly. I don’t have to deal with the grieving that widows and even divorced women have to deal with on top of parenting.

My daughter has never known her father- and she doesn’t have to deal with particularly painful death or divorce grief either.

I don’t mean to dismiss the stresses that EVERY single parent feels whether they are widowed, divorced, or never married. I just wonder if out of the three, ‘never married’ might be the easiest.

Yup, it is tough and I pray to God every day that he guide my steps and help me be the best parent I can be. I sacrifice and live close to my parents so she can understand, and be a living part of an extended family. I make sure she attends the local Catholic school- through their gracious tuition assistance program. I work a block from home so I am available at any time of the day for her.

I figured my aspirations for greatness in my career and love life took a back seat when I had her, and I enjoy being a mother to my daughter.

I shall pray for all the single parents out there through the Advent season. This is sometimes the hardest time for us- because we can’t always give the type of presents to our kids that they would like, nor do we have the ‘traditional’ family atmosphere.

May all families find a healing and joyfull spirit this Christmas season.

Shiann

 

[mkw]

Thank You jrabs. They are much needed and graciously accepted.

 

[space_ghost]

there’s no way that i could do what you do… i promise you, you will one day be in heaven…

http://www.mypharmacy.co.uk/health_books/books/h/how_to_succeed_as_a_single_parent_2.jpg

 

[jrabs]

space ghost:

there’s no way that i could do what you do… i promise you, you will one day be in heaven…

God willing you will never have to - but then you have your own set of spirit duties.
The downside you have is that many people are afraid of ghosts.

My upside is that only 2 little people fear me ( a healthy fear brought on by respect, I hope).

 

[sparkle]

jrabs:

Hi Katy,
I am that crazy mom chasing 2 boys from the cleanliness thread.
I was married for 10 years to a man with severe addictions and mental disorders. Thought I could “save him”, but oh goodness me, that is a bad reason to get married. I am now annulled ( God is great).
Unfortunately, this man disappeared back in March from the face of the Earth on our son’s 8th birthday. Never to be heard from again. So the boys have been without a dad.
I hope you have a good support system in family and friends that can give you a bit of a break at times - and maybe monetary help as well from time to time.
Money wise - God looked out for me because my ill husband never worked so I am used to supporting the family on my own means, as difficult as it is - at least I am used to it. I also have great parents who will help with sitters if needed.
I have read the other posts by you and it sounds like you and I have had our share of lonliness ( as many here have had)…God will bless us with supportive St Joseph type men if that is His will for us. Trust in that and stay close to God - and focus on bringing up your child with faith. It is hard to keep the lonlies at bay sometimes - but I am certain that if you and I stay close to God and listen to His will, He will bless us abundantly in whatever form that will take.
From what I have read through your posts, Katy, you seem to be a remarkably strong, smart and faithfilled woman. Your child is blessed to have such a devoted mother.
May God pour His blessing over you and your child this Advent Season. Have faith.
Jennifer

Hi my friend jrabs and Katy:

As jrabs said: God is so faithful! As jrabs pointed out, SHE has had to do it on her own, considering her own situation–YOU can make it as well Katy. Don’t ever despair, O.K.? You are awesome–and you both just wait–many are the joys and blessings of those that wait upon Him.!!! Luv you both!!!

Happy Advent to you both friends!!

Luv,

Sparkle

"Happy is He whose God is Lord" Psalm 144:15

 

[jrabs]

sparkle:

Hi my friend jrabs and Katy:

As jrabs said: God is so faithful! As jrabs pointed out, SHE has had to do it on her own, considering her own situation–YOU can make it as well Katy. Don’t ever despair, O.K.? You are awesome–and you both just wait–many are the joys and blessings of those that wait upon Him.!!! Luv you both!!!

Happy Advent to you both friends!!

Luv,

Sparkle

"Happy is He whose God is Lord"

awe Sparks, you make me wanna cry. Thanks. There are some really great people on this site - you are among the best!

 

[sparkle]

jrabs:

awe Sparks, you make me wanna cry. Thanks. There are some really great people on this site - you are among the best!

Hello jrabs–

Well- my heart is just full for all you single moms out there today! God Luv You! As I do----isn’t it just a blessing for this site? I think so!

I’m praying for you today–wherever you might be jrabs----just wanted you to know! saying a Rosary tonite for you dear Catholic friend~~

 

[jrabs]

sparkle:

Hello jrabs–

Well- my heart is just full for all you single moms out there today! God Luv You! As I do----isn’t it just a blessing for this site? I think so!

I’m praying for you today–wherever you might be jrabs----just wanted you to know! saying a Rosary tonite for you dear Catholic friend~~

The rosary…I see you are hooked now!!! I am so proud of you. You will see great blessing in your life as a result.

I will keep you (Sparkle) and single parents in my prayers too. The rosary is an awesome tool for when you are feeling the pressures of single-parenthood, or like Sparkle, just to say because she now loves it!

 

[Brendan]

Wow,

You ladies have both my deep respect and my prayers!

 

[AmyS]

I was a single parent for the first 7 years of my daughters life… I still feel that way at times because I am so used to doing things on my own with my daughter that having a husband now hasn’t made such a big difference, maybe I am a control freak (I have only been married two years). My daughter is the light of my life. God bless all mothers, it is a womens job diffinitley something special. God bless you single mothers, I know how difficult it can be.

 

[Teresa9]

Dear friends

It is so wondeful to hear of your courage and at the same time, such love and hope in your posts.

I am a single parent, not by choice, I had my daughter out of marriage but was engaged to be married. I lost my first baby and when I became pregnant again, the father said he hoped I miscarried again and didn’t want our baby, he left me. I was two months pregnant. I can remember feeling so afraid. I’d lie in bed crying alone at night wondering how on earth I was going to cope.

I made my mind up I was going to cope and prayed and asked God to help me. He did! The hardest part was the sleepless nights alone, with no-one on hand to let me rest. In the end my daughter slept with me and we had wonderful nights sleep after that! She is now three (in her own bed! ) and is the most beautiful bright, cheery and intelligent child I know, well all mum’s say that, but she is my heart and I thank God for her everyday. She is the best thing that has ever happened in my life and I would not change a thing.

I have learnt alot about myself and how selfish I was before I became a parent. I have learnt more about love and how God must love His children only more so than our human love is capable of.

I never find I am lonely, I have my daughter and God! as well as my friends and family. But late at night before I go to sleep, I look into her room and sit watching her sleeping peacefully and say a little prayer over her, usually to her guardian angel and I know I could not ask for anything more wonderful and beautiful from God than the gift He gave me, the love of my daughter.

I am proud of you all for persevering in what is not easy, single-parenthood calls for grace, but it is the most wonderful thing to be blessed with children and to give life to them, so many pregnancies result in abortion.

God Bless you and much love and peace to you and those you love especially your little ones.

Teresa

 

[jrabs]

Teresa9:

God Bless you and much love and peace to you and those you love especially your little ones.

Teresa

Dear Friend Teresa - you have been an inspiration to me in all other posts I read from you. Now I am even more in awe of your perseverance, faith and love.

God is great - and you are a living testimony at how he works through you to bless others.

Your daughter is soooooooo blessed to have you! And we are blessed to have you as well.

 

[AmyS]

Teresa9:

Dear friends

It is so wondeful to hear of your courage and at the same time, such love and hope in your posts.

I am a single parent, not by choice, I had my daughter out of marriage but was engaged to be married. I lost my first baby and when I became pregnant again, the father said he hoped I miscarried again and didn’t want our baby, he left me. I was two months pregnant. I can remember feeling so afraid. I’d lie in bed crying alone at night wondering how on earth I was going to cope.

I made my mind up I was going to cope and prayed and asked God to help me. He did! The hardest part was the sleepless nights alone, with no-one on hand to let me rest. In the end my daughter slept with me and we had wonderful nights sleep after that! She is now three (in her own bed! ) and is the most beautiful bright, cheery and intelligent child I know, well all mum’s say that, but she is my heart and I thank God for her everyday. She is the best thing that has ever happened in my life and I would not change a thing.

I have learnt alot about myself and how selfish I was before I became a parent. I have learnt more about love and how God must love His children only more so than our human love is capable of.

I never find I am lonely, I have my daughter and God! as well as my friends and family. But late at night before I go to sleep, I look into her room and sit watching her sleeping peacefully and say a little prayer over her, usually to her guardian angel and I know I could not ask for anything more wonderful and beautiful from God than the gift He gave me, the love of my daughter.

I am proud of you all for persevering in what is not easy, single-parenthood calls for grace, but it is the most wonderful thing to be blessed with children and to give life to them, so many pregnancies result in abortion.

God Bless you and much love and peace to you and those you love especially your little ones.

Teresa

I can relate with your post so much… I love what you wrote about watching your daughter sleep, I still do and probably always will. She amazes me. It is a wonderful, blessed thing being a mother… too bad society tries to teach women diffirent especially when they aren’t married. Children are always a gift, some people are too selfish to see it. My daughter is, and always will be the love of my life… I thank God for her over and over again everyday… I hear love songs and think of her. Oh yeah, the sleeping in your bed thing, i did that too… I still do every once in a while, we will have slumber parties in our guest room. God bless you all and your beautiful gifts from God.

 

[katybird]

Thanks for all your really nice replies! I like knowing I’m not alone here!

You’re right… it’s amazing how much trusting in God has helped me! I’ve been very, very blessed.

My son (Thomas Becket, I call him Becket) is the most wonderful thing to ever happen to me. Sure, it’s scary and I worry but I do have to say that I feel less depressed now than I have in my adult life!

My little poopy is just so beautiful and sweet. He’s six months old and it’s been the best six months of my life!