Any advice for laziness?

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JessHav

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Hi all!
I’m about to start school again…after four weeks of grueling summer classes followed by six more weeks of “lazy days” where I had no obligations other than going to work for three hours and then coming home…which led to many 4-6 hour naps that would last until 6 or 7 pm. Now my husband was working about 14 hour days, so I was all alone, and most of my friends are home for the summer, so it was just me and my dog. I knew there were a million things I should do (clean the house, do the dishes, clean the car, etc.) but somehow I kept putting them off one day, then two, etc. My husband is a very understanding man and he hasn’t said much, but I know that it is my “job” to keep the house clean since he has so much on his plate and I have nothing. Plus, I want to help him come home to a pleasant and clean house after all his days of working. But everytime I thought of all the work to be done, even one simple task, I suddenly felt very sleepy =) No really, I did! And so I’ve been messing up my sleep night after night, not getting “to bed” until 3 in the morning. I just can’t get over this lethargic feeling! There are so many things that I put on my to-do list that overwhelm me.

I guess my problem is that I am one of those people who is motivated by last-minute adrenaline (never done a thing early in my life!) and somehow I feel that there is no “reward” in doing these things…that they aren’t important enough to get stressed out about. yet, at the end of the day, when I pray, I know that when I say that I want to live for Christ, I have just spent days living slovenly, which makes me feel extra guilty.

Help! Any suggestions on how to keep up with housework, keep busy (it is so hot here that staying inside is a must) and most of all, how to get motivated? I know that school will definitely perk me up, but I need some prayers or devotional routine that makes me want to stay out of bed!

Please pray for me,

Jess Havin
 
This is what I recommended to my wife, who at one point had no energy to do anything around the house. I told her that since her blood was not circulating that was the reason she was so tired. She started coming to the gym with me and when we got home she had energy to do things. If you keep the blood in you body flowwing you will not be as tired. Have you ever wondered how a athelete has the energy to do the things they do? It’s is because of blodd flow. Stay active. Exercise is the key to not being lazy. When you are doing some house cleaning don’t stop until you are done. When you stop that is when you will lose your energy level and trust me it is harder to get started again after your body has cooled down and your blood has stop circulating. I know your going to say that blood circulates all the time, but what I mean is that when you exercise your heart works harder to supply blood to your muscles, that is what i mean about circulation. Just stay active thats all, minimize your down time.

Good luck.
 
Agree with the sentiment of the last poster. Here are my suggestions:
  • Prayer (morning/noon/night)-first thing after you wake up, pray for the strength & grace to overcome any temptation you may have that day towards slothful behavior
  • Healthy diet
  • Regular exercise (preferably earlier in the day, exercising at night will rev up your metabolism & make it more difficult to get to bed early)
  • Moderate alcohol intake
  • Plan your day, schedule tasks & mark them off when you complete them
  • Get a physical & check up with your primary care physician. Get your thyroid levels checked for sure. Hypothyroidism can present with some of the symptoms you have discussed here.
  • Waking up early means going to bed earlier!
  • Keep prayin’!
 
Good replies, all. I fight this, too. It comes from several things. As you have self-identified, you are urgency-based, instead of importance-based. You and I just can’t find anything all that important about whatever it is we decide to do. We have to have some external fire built under our behinds to get going! Some suggestions:

First off, exercise some personal integrity. Set a very specific goal for every day, like getting out of bed at a certain time. Make it a certain time, like 5:55 am or 6:20 am. You might want to make it getting out of bed with your husband and having the kitchen cleaned up by a certain time after he leaves, allowing yourself diversions like reading the paper only if you’re doing it with your husband before he leaves for work.

Take the time to define what is important to you, then set some priorities. Envision what you’d like to get done by a certain date, then set some goals to get to that. The goals ought to be written down, and done in such a manner that you can break them down into steps that you will be able to measure or at least discern whether you’re making progress.

Involve your husband in two things: One, have him challenge you as to what you have the talent to do. You are very likely a person who sells herself short. Tell him what you would like to be able to do, what your aspirations are, and allow him to encourage you in that direction or perhaps question whether there might be other things that you aren’t considering yourself capable of. Two, be accountable to yourself, but let him serve as the daily witness that you’re doing it. Show him your list of priorities (which should include both personal and joint priorities), your list of goals, and your plan for the week as to how it’s going to get done. Then when you “report in” to yourself at day’s end, have him be there for it. You and I let ourselves off easily, but we don’t like admitting it to the whole world. (Am I right?)

You might find help in Seven Habits for Highly Effective People, by Steven Covey. Many libraries have it… but don’t let yourself just get into reading and no further! It is the putting first things first that most people have trouble with, not just people like us. Be ready for that. (Mr. Covey may even have another book out that deals with that issue.)

The problem you describe is typical of a certain personality type that has many good points and temptations associated with it. One of them is a tendency to depression. Think of that as your trick knee. It is no excuse to stop being active, but if you don’t watch out for it, you’ll cripple yourself up good at regular intervals. I think Discovering the Enneagram by Richard Rohr and Andreas Ebert describes it rather well. They would call you a Nine. Reading this book won’t solve your problem, but will help you identify the strong points and struggles that you will probably always be facing. You need to give yourself some credit, and while you can’t drive yourself into the ground without falling into utter collapse, you need to get out there and do stuff!

Good Luck! (And wish me luck, too!) On that note… I have to kick myself off of this forum again for awhile. It is taking up too much of my day. When I let it get out of hand, I have to self-impose a moratorium.

See you all in October! (Chase me away if I post sooner.)
 
This is all good advice. I esp. like the one about getting up early and starting the day with prayer, first thing out.

You might also want to limit your caffeine intake. I LOVE coffee, but I can only have a cup 1/2 a day, or I am a lethargic mess.
 
Eat a good breakfast! I found when I eat a healthy breakfast I have TONS more energy than if I skip it or just have a piece of toast. Cereal or cereal bars have a lot of vitamins, especially the low sugar, high fiber type like raisin bran. I reccomend Kashi.
 
I’m glad you posted this, cuz I have this problem sometimes too. What I found I finally had to do was to force myself to do things whether I felt like it or not. And I found that once I “got going”–I picked up energy and then felt better about myself because I got so much done.

My sleep is messed up a lot too. Guess, you could say that I’m a “night owl” by nature. So, I just started doing house-work late at night, if that was the only time I could get it done. Sometimes, I would put on my favorite TV show while I worked and then I didn’t notice the “drudgery” of house-work so much.

I hope you feel better soon–I’ve been there, so I know that awful sleepy feeling! It’s no fun for sure–but, a lot of the time, once I get started–I am glad that I did.

Take Care,

C J
 
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MonicaPA:
Agree with the sentiment of the last poster. Here are my suggestions:
  • Prayer (morning/noon/night)-first thing after you wake up, pray for the strength & grace to overcome any temptation you may have that day towards slothful behavior
  • Healthy diet
  • Regular exercise (preferably earlier in the day, exercising at night will rev up your metabolism & make it more difficult to get to bed early)
  • Moderate alcohol intake
  • Plan your day, schedule tasks & mark them off when you complete them
  • Get a physical & check up with your primary care physician. Get your thyroid levels checked for sure. Hypothyroidism can present with some of the symptoms you have discussed here.
  • Waking up early means going to bed earlier!
  • Keep prayin’!
Click to expand...
I would do all of the above, but right before bed add one more item. An examination of conscience just like you were heading to confession. Then ask two more questions…Did I use the time God gave me to glorify Him? Did I perform my duties to the best of my abilities? If the answer is no, then remember that as wives we have a religious vocation just like nuns…and we need to raise our housework to the Lord and perform our duties with love.

Now, if I could actually follow my own advice I would have one very happy hubby!
:o
 
I don’t know about you, but when I have to get a goal accomplished I usually like to have something getting me energized. Try these things:

-Cut out soda and coffee; you’ll feel better and you’ll have more energy
-Open the blinds and make the outside world visible; covered windows and totally closed doors tend to make us feel like it’s later (and hence we get sleepy)
-Put on some music; a little rock-n-roll can give you that adrenaline to get stuff done fast…but make sure the speakers are loud enough 🙂
 
I agree with Nobody! Check out:

www.flylady.net

It may seem like too much work, but her message boils down to the following:

Love yourself - when you learn to love yourself anything is possible.
Anything can be done in 15 minutes - this part really works.

Maggie
 
Hey all!

Thanks for the awesome suggestions; I’m definitely going to take a multi-vitamin and also try to get things done as quickly as possible, with my favorite music and tv shows on.
I also talked to my husband about the housework and how we have to motivate each other to get our stuff done…Hopefully these things will work.
I’ve been sleeping a little more regularly, which seems to get me going enough that I don’t have to take naps…

Thank you all again and have a great last few weeks of summer!

Jess Havin
 
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