Any advice??

[TOP]

I have found myself in the same situation after a spiritual experience in 05 that brought me back to the Church. Yeah, you have to communicate, but how you do it is key. Include her in the decision process. Example: If I want the family to go to confession on Sat. and catch the vigil mass afterwards. I"ll ask my wife, "How are we doing on gas?..OK, because I wanted to take the kids to church early for confession Saturday, but I didn’t know if you wanted to go to Church on Sunday and if we made 2 trips we might not have enough gas Monday morning. Then I suggest we all go early Sat. and bang, we are all in grace. . Really I feel for ya. It’s not easy to lead when the world pulls apart the family. Sometimes it may just be you and the kids at church, but always leave the door open and allow her to partake in the planning. Hope this helps, Tim

 

[belmontmac]

*If your wife was not Catholic, I could somewhat see the issue, but since she is…I’m puzzled at why she has issues with your desire to grow in holiness…that is all you are trying to do–grow in holiness. I’ll pray that she sees it like that, instead of you trying to force anything upon her. If she chooses to not partake of the things that you wish to do, in your faith journey…so be it. Pray for her to see that what you’re doing is a positive thing, that really, can only help your marriage.

Does your wife view you as the spiritual head of household? When you say she goes through life as ‘her way or the highway,’ how do you react? *

I don’t know, maybe, I usually speak my peace whether we agree or not, and then let her have her way, kinda sad, but I don’t like fighting and seeing her upset.

 

[belmontmac]

I have found myself in the same situation after a spiritual experience in 05 that brought me back to the Church. Yeah, you have to communicate, but how you do it is key. Include her in the decision process. Example: If I want the family to go to confession on Sat. and catch the vigil mass afterwards. I"ll ask my wife, "How are we doing on gas?..OK, because I wanted to take the kids to church early for confession Saturday, but I didn’t know if you wanted to go to Church on Sunday and if we made 2 trips we might not have enough gas Monday morning. Then I suggest we all go early Sat. and bang, we are all in grace. . Really I feel for ya. It’s not easy to lead when the world pulls apart the family. Sometimes it may just be you and the kids at church, but always leave the door open and allow her to partake in the planning. Hope this helps, Tim

Love it great idea. Yes communication is the key, just like not what is said, but how it is said. The gas thing is great, although our Church is right across the street from our neighborhood, we can walk(buy usually don’t). Thanks again, God bless…

 

[purplesunshine]

Absolutley not the case, kids are very involved in the Church(at least for their age)

Does preparing them for and then ferrying them to the “involved” stuff fall on her shoulders, though?

Does time that you typically spent with her or her& the kids turn to God time? I’m not saying you’re in the wrong at all, I’m just trying to help you understand where she might feel slighted or exhausted.

 

[belmontmac]

Does preparing them for and then ferrying them to the “involved” stuff fall on her shoulders, though?

Does time that you typically spent with her or her& the kids turn to God time? I’m not saying you’re in the wrong at all, I’m just trying to help you understand where she might feel slighted or exhausted.

CCD and choir, she usually drops them off and I pickup them up, so a 50/50 split. No on the God time, kids listen to Bible stories at night to go to sleep to, on cd’s, and no usual family prayer, sometimes before bed, but sometimes I tell the kids, make sure you pray before you go to sleep, don’t want to be too much in her eyes. I try to read nightly, whether it is the Bible or something Faith related, but for 20 mins or so, after the kids are in bed, but is not set in stone, varies from night to night.

 

[purplesunshine]

What would she say if you took them to CCD/choir practice and stayed and prayed in the church? That’d be less wear on your vehicle and on her. And you’d get time to pray without interruptions. You could read over the stations, etc.

 

[belmontmac]

What would she say if you took them to CCD/choir practice and stayed and prayed in the church? That’d be less wear on your vehicle and on her. And you’d get time to pray without interruptions. You could read over the stations, etc.

Thats a good idea, except start time is while I’m on my way home from work, and I pick them up on my way home, CCD is at the local middle school, not enough room in the Church, we have a very large Parish. Thanks…