Hi all,
I’ve been interested in learning more about Catholicism for some time now and finally attended my first weekday Mass this morning. I found it to be a beautiful and authentic experience, and it was much easier to enter into prayer and meditation during Mass than it was during the Protestant services in which I was raised. My question is how often I can attend Mass without making the decision to become Catholic? I’d like to at least continue during the coming week, if that doesn’t pose a problem.
I did not go forward to receive Communion, and I sat in the back and tried to be inconspicuous and respectful – standing, kneeling, etc. even though I didn’t know all of the liturgy. My worry is that eventually my attendance will raise eyebrows or cause concern if I show up every day without participating fully, and I’m not ready to be proselytized just yet (one of the other things I appreciated about the service was that no one swarmed me or singled me out as a newcomer, which so often happens in Protestant churches). The church offers classes one night a week for inquirers, but I’d be more comfortable if I became further acquainted with the worship first. The best I can explain is that it felt like an encounter I’d like to continue to explore.
I just don’t want to be inadvertently disrespectful, or fail to meet the expectation of an immediate conversion.
Thoughts are appreciated!
Lauren
You are always welcome to attend Mass. You can attend as often as you wish and for as long as you wish.
You should proceed at the pace at which you are comfortable, doing reading on your own, and becoming accustomed to the Mass. When you are ready, you can think about the classes.
Some people will call the parish office and they know they want to start the process…and others want to take it slowly, look things over, and think about it. Both ways are perfectly fine.
One thing to be aware of is that some parishes only do the cycle of classes once per year and others do them twice per year. Right now is at the end of the standard cycle. Should the parish you are attending offer a second cycle, it would begin after Easter. The standard cycle starts in late Summer, typically. If you begin classes, it will take several months and you are not making any commitment to become Catholic, so please feel at ease on that account.
Do not be surprised if, at some point, someone strikes up a conversation with you. Especially at daily Mass, the group is smaller and typically made up of regulars who are there each day. It is not unusual to have a visitor as Catholics do travel…but as it becomes seen that you are an enduring presence, if days and weeks go by, someone will always want to be welcoming and may strike up a conversation…not to proselytize but just to be friendly, assuming you have just perhaps moved into the parish. Of course, some people have to get to work immediately after a weekday Mass and don’t have time to stay or to visit.
Some parishes, notably on Sundays, may have people to greet those coming in. Of course, you can always say that you are just visiting. Don’t be put off. They also are not there to proselytize but are there as a way of being welcoming and helping visitors from out of town or those who may have just moved into the parish…available to say where the rest room and water fountain are and such as that. And not all parishes do this anyway.
Sometimes, too, ushers for the larger Masses at some parishes, on Sundays, help keep orderly the people approaching for Communion since the crowd is larger than on a weekday…and this sometimes happens row by row. Don’t let that bother you. Since you are not Catholic, you would simply stay in place and people can either move around you or you can step out of the pew to facilitate their getting out to go up and then you can just step back into the pew. Of course, some parishes are not as crowded and you could even find you have a pew to yourself.
A number of parishes will have something after Sunday Mass…a coffee and donut sort of gathering. You can go or not as you wish…but that is a social moment and people very well may come up and chat, especially if you are standing alone. They won’t try to corral you however.
You should feel free to introduce yourself to the priest after Mass, either by going to the sacristy (that is the room where we put on and off the vestments we wear when we offer Mass) or do so when he comes out to greet people, which especially happens after Sunday Masses.
I know from my own experience that people, especially those who are not Catholic, may be hesitant to approach the room where we are after Mass but people are regularly coming through…those who help in the sanctuary during the service or people who want to talk to us.
The priest himself might come up and say hello, either because he realises you are new or because he just happens to pass by. Some of us have more initiative for doing that than others…we’re human and some of us are more naturally sociable than others.
Regardless, we priests are always glad to welcome visitors personally, to recognise them when we see them (just as we are glad to recognise those who are members of our parish), and also to be available if anyone wants to talk to us. You might have questions, for example, or like to know more about some aspect of the church building or the Mass or such. Also, since the congregation is smaller at a daily Mass, we can generally recognise someone we are not accustomed to seeing. Truth be told, though, our days can be so busy that sometimes we have to dash off after Mass for the next thing on the schedule and so we disappear quickly once Mass is finished.
I hope, wherever you attend, that you will feel most welcomed. I will remember you in my prayers as you continue your exploration of Catholicism and I wish you all the best as you continue to explore.
