Attending Non-Catholic Wedding

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A Catholic declines to attend a non-Catholic wedding of a (former ?) Catholic because it is not a Catholic wedding. He/she states the reason why. It is known that the (former ?) Catholic planning to be wed was baptized and confirmed a Catholic. It is not known whether the (former?) Catholic has formally left the Church.

Is this being judgemental?
 
Is it a Christian marriage? Because I believe that Christian marriages are recognized within the Catholic Church.
 
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Coder:
A Catholic declines to attend a non-Catholic wedding of a (former ?) Catholic because it is not a Catholic wedding. He/she states the reason why. It is known that the (former ?) Catholic planning to be wed was baptized and confirmed a Catholic. It is not known whether the (former?) Catholic has formally left the Church.

Is this being judgemental?
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I voted yes…but since when is judging behavior wrong?
 
Good point. To decide to attend a wedding or participate in anything often requires judgement.

Voters: please view the poll question as meaning “unfairly judgemental”
 
Why don’t you ask if they have left the church formally? Another thought… when I got married, in a Presbytarian church, I had NO IDEA that Catholics were required to get married in a Catholic church. I’d never heard of a dispensation. Maybe this person doesn’t know either? If you know them well, you could casually bring it up.

Personally, I would go. If you haven’t approached them with the concerns and information they possiblty won’t even know why you aren’t there.
 
It depends on who is getting married. If it is non-Catholic friends then of course I would attend. But in the case of Catholics such as my brother who “got Sealed” in the Mormon Church no I would not attend. He was mad at me but I don’t compromise my beliefs for nobody.
 
Can. 1124 Indicates that a marriage between a baptized Catholic and a non-Catholic Christian is prohibited unless the Catholic has defected by a formal act or there is permission granted.
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Yes, but the wedding would still have to be celebrated according to the canonical form of marriage treated in canon 1108 (with due regard for its exceptions) unless the local ordinary dispenses from form (canon 1127 §2) Otherwise the non-Catholic ceremony does not result in a valid marriage. This is called “marrying outside the Church,” and does not enjoy the legal presumption of validity at all, even if the parties are otherwise free to contract marriage.

The canon you referenced encompasses not only the situation in which there is dispensation from form, but also the situation in which Catholic form is observed. If a properly authorized priest or deacon assisted the couple to give and receive consent, and the two witnesses were present, (the basic elements of the Catholic form of marriage), a Catholic wedding “without the express permission of the competent authority” would be valid but illicit.

In general, Catholics, even when wedding non-Catholics, are bound to the Catholic form for the validity of marriage. But again, this can be dispensed, and there are exceptions.
 
Is there a specific guideline that states that a faithful Catholic should not attend a cannonically invalid wedding? Is this official Church teaching or merely the opinion of well meaning faithful Catholics? After all, I won’t have much of a chance of reevangelizing my nephew, who recently embrace Unitarianism, if I show disrespect for him and his new bride by boycotting their upcoming wedding. I am not talking about attending just to be nice but rather as a means of bringing my nephew, and his mom (my sister) and dad back into the Church.
 
Is this official Church teaching or merely the opinion of well meaning faithful Catholics?
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It’s over-scrupulosity, IMHO.

Mel,

Welcome to be boards. I love your handle!

I think you’ll find some of that around here. For me, absent a clear Church prohibition (There isn’t one.) there’s no reason not to go. For him to see you as the good Catholic example, you have to be seen.

John
 
In a way, yes it is judgemental… but isn’t it also condoning or accepting the idea of breaking or falling away from the Church?
 
Unless you know for sure that dispensation has been granted, you should not go.
 
John Higgins:
It’s over-scrupulosity, IMHO.

Mel,

Welcome to be boards. I love your handle!

I think you’ll find some of that around here. For me, absent a clear Church prohibition (There isn’t one.) there’s no reason not to go. For him to see you as the good Catholic example, you have to be seen.

John
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John,
I see your point… I too would normally look for “a clear Church prohibition” when making such a decision… but, then, again I also know that the Church does not give such prohibitions for every moral decision that must be made (such prudential judgments require that you apply the moral principles of the Faith to particular situations as they arise).
At this very moment, I am faced with an invitation to a friend’s wedding. She was unchurched completely (and I am not sure, she might have been baptized Catholic, but never practiced). Her fiance divorced and has a child. He was trying to obtain an annulment, but went ahead and proposed to my friend before he could get it (who is ignorant of all of the canon law requirements for the sacrament as she was unchurched). She obviously pushed forward with the wedding planning. He was casual about the annulment, and now they are getting married with no marriage prep, in a United Methodist Church. They are living together but have been attending Mass (and my friend was wanting to go deeper into her faith). What a mess! I have talked to her a little about the situation but do not even know where to start, because she needs full catechesis and marriage prep. How can I go to this wedding in this case? Just to drink and dance? I really see a long letter and follow up conversation with my friend as the best chance for evangelization. What does it look like if I go. It would seem to me that the sacrament of marriage as we understand it in the Church is unimportant. Sorry to blab on about my situation, but the post was relevant to my decision, and I would like some feedback. Thanks all. (ps: I am also in formation for the priesthood–I am not clergy yet, but friends know that I am preparing and discerning a vocation… would that not make my attendance even worse?)
 
One point of clarification to my post: the groom is catholic for sure, and in need of the annulment… he is, of course, not going to get it in time and so they are marrying at a United Methodist Church (neither of them are Methodist). To make things worse, my friend the bride says she wants to start attending whatever church she marries in. Sounds like this is a case of two people giving up on a Catholic wedding and leaving the Church to join a denomination. The husband has also implied he wants to limit the number of his future children (and I do not think via NFP). To me, this sounds like a disaster. No way could I go.
 
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