Awesome blog post on NFP

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meh. I don’t know. It just seemed to try to justify imperfection and whine about some perceived high horse with a shot at more conservative catholics with the chapel veil homeschooling comment…🤷

Was it a thought. Sure. Many postings here have been better in my opinion.
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
meh. I don’t know. It just seemed to try to justify imperfection and whine about some perceived high horse with a shot at more conservative catholics with the chapel veil homeschooling comment…🤷
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Hmm, not really. The author was quoting a “liberal Catholic” blog post which took a swipe at more conservative Catholics, and then proceeded to break it down and provide a healthy dose of realism. (I’d call this “the Ratzinger method”, because Pope Emeritus Benedict often does this in his writings - quote the opponent’s position, and then dissect it carefully and charitably.)
 
The book that she recommends The Sinner’s Guide to Natural Family Planning is good. As the book says, what they don’t tell you about NFP is that it’s not easy. NFP leads you to the Cross. It’s hard, at times you’ll hate it beyond anything, and you’ll question why you even stick with it. I can’t personally relate any kind of experience (yet), but I can’t imagine it being as simple (at least for everyone) as some like to make it. However, just like everything else, following the will of the Lord tends to lead to the Cross. :signofcross:
 
RPRPsych said:
Hmm, not really. The author was quoting a “liberal Catholic” blog post which took a swipe at more conservative Catholics, and then proceeded to break it down and provide a healthy dose of realism. (I’d call this “the Ratzinger method”, because Pope Emeritus Benedict often does this in his writings - quote the opponent’s position, and then dissect it carefully and charitably.)
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After your post I read it again. I still do not understand where you think the author was trying to be an opponent to the “liberal article” But rather seemed to want to elaborate on it.
 
I agree with the blog author. One of the things that drove me away from the forum for a while is the petty bickering about minutiae.

Online NFP discussions seem like a battleground where some folks try to out-do each other in scrupulosity and judgmentalism. It’s totally un-Catholic and paints NFP practising Catholics as argumentative, extreme, and disconnected from the basis of our faith. What better way to alienate like-practising Catholics and dissolve any sense of community.

What we need is more open-mindedness, tolerance, and charity toward those who think most like us. The world sees what we project, and it would be far better if NFPers kept the spirit of agape alive when posting about NFP.

I think this thead has been reasonable in that regard, but probably half the topics I see on the forum (more on NFP) descend into in-fighting, usually on a tangent that nobody cares one whit about.
 
alphawoman said:
I agree with the blog author. One of the things that drove me away from the forum for a while is the petty bickering about minutiae
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I think that some of those discussion would be best moved to another sub forum here at CAF, as you end up with a battle between theological minutiae(as you put it) versus real life emotion. Also the nature of the internet is that for the most part only people with really strong feelings on a matter will take the effort to post and re post on a subject, it is not a cross section. It is the same with sports, politics, virtually everything.
 
I wasn’t crazy about the Zmirk article either, especially the bizarre potshots at “white trash” Catholics and Catholics who go on public assistance. However, I agreed with his larger point about the bizarre conservative Catholic subculture.

I thought this part of the blog post I linked to was right on target:
It’s true; self-righteous dismissal and distrust of Others isn’t going to win any converts. It also endangers the few devout believers who do hold fast to beleaguered truths of the faith. Even if you are among the remnant that actually shuns contraception, there plenty of your compatriots ready to warn that you might be Doing It Wrong. Internet discussions about Natural Family Planning and childbearing are notoriously contentious. “Perfect love casts out fear,” (1 John 4:18) but there is plenty of “bitterness, crankiness,” infighting, and fearmongering in the NFP subculture. Look at any recent article about the morality and ethics of NFP, and you’ll see several cliques all blackguarding each other:
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  • Dire conspiracy theorists sure most people’s reasons for postponing pregnancy aren’t good enough
  • Harried parents paranoid that they should be pregnant again or that they discerned poorly
  • Rival method loyalists engaged in combox brawls
  • Theologians insensitive to the emotional responses their coldly logical syllogisms elicit
  • Infertility martyrs who shame anyone with “lesser” sufferings for complaining
  • Glib spouters of the conventional wisdom that anyone struggling with NFP must be lazy and/or selfish, lustful, lacking in faith, or resisting God’s will
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Is this really the alternative we want to offer the secular world? Instead of getting free birth control pills, you can be part of a tiny subculture that bickers about the minutiae of bodily functions and acts as the pregnancy thought police! Doesn’t that sound life-giving and awesome?
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This is EXACTLY what happens in pretty much every NFP discussion on this forum.
 
sdeco said:
I wasn’t crazy about the Zmirk article either, especially the bizarre potshots at “white trash” Catholics and Catholics who go on public assistance. However, I agreed with his larger point about the bizarre conservative Catholic subculture.

I thought this part of the blog post I linked to was right on target:

This is EXACTLY what happens in pretty much every NFP discussion on this forum.
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I am still at a loss of what the point is. Can you give me the one sentence cliffs notes version. Is it “we are infighting and should not?” If so, what is to be done about it. And what is the cause of it? If we are infighting we must be infighting about something right?🤷

This type of problem is directly unique to NFP in the Church. For it is the only thing that is so subjective that for one couple it may be a sin to abstain and for another in exactly the same or worse, circumstances it is not.
This ambiguity will always lead to disagreement. NFP and it’s implementation is unique and therefore calls for unique and vigorous discussion. ESPECIALLY among the “remnant” as the article put it.
It is within this infighting that we discern our own faith. Our own knowledge.

If we unite and say" NFP! Whatever whenever !!👍👍👍👍"

And that is it. We have falsely advertised it and it will fail.
I like the infighting to be honest. It brings about discussion, it brings about study, logic and different perspectives.
 
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