Bad work environment

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walnutleviosa

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Not sure where I should post this but I’ll put it here. Two months ago I took a job in a small office (just me and my manager). I like the work that I do butt here are several problems: my manager constantly put me down and take out her anger on me. I talk to her about it, she is apologetic but then does it again and again. Problem two is that she is constantly cursing and discussing things that are not appropriate and it embarrasses me. I try to tell her nicely that I do not like it but she tells me to kiss her you know what. I cannot leave because I have to work for a living. I am depressed going in everyday because I have to deal with this. She claims to be catholic but would not even give up on the cursing for lent. Any advice is helpful.
 
I have no advice but I was in a quite similar experience last year. Maybe it was good, though, because it was the impetus that made me take concrete steps towards a career change. I’m still in the same job, but I start college in August so each day is easier because I know that it is another day closer to my goal.

I will keep you in my prayers and I do truly empathize with you. :console:
 
walnutleviosa said:
Not sure where I should post this but I’ll put it here. Two months ago I took a job in a small office (just me and my manager). I like the work that I do butt here are several problems: my manager constantly put me down and take out her anger on me. I talk to her about it, she is apologetic but then does it again and again. Problem two is that she is constantly cursing and discussing things that are not appropriate and it embarrasses me. I try to tell her nicely that I do not like it but she tells me to kiss her you know what. I cannot leave because I have to work for a living. I am depressed going in everyday because I have to deal with this. She claims to be catholic but would not even give up on the cursing for lent. Any advice is helpful.
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Can you begin looking for another job?
 
walnutleviosa said:
Not sure where I should post this but I’ll put it here. Two months ago I took a job in a small office (just me and my manager). I like the work that I do butt here are several problems: my manager constantly put me down and take out her anger on me. I talk to her about it, she is apologetic but then does it again and again. Problem two is that she is constantly cursing and discussing things that are not appropriate and it embarrasses me. I try to tell her nicely that I do not like it but she tells me to kiss her you know what. I cannot leave because I have to work for a living. I am depressed going in everyday because I have to deal with this. She claims to be catholic but would not even give up on the cursing for lent. Any advice is helpful.
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I feel bad for you, I once had to work in a hostile environment and I nearly had a breakdown. However, is there no one who is her superior you can speak with? This is really harrassment. If you do have recourse, be sure you document everything before presenting it in a mature manner. times, dates, reports of the incidents.

If not, perhaps you could look for another job on your days off. Sooner or later, this will get old.
 
You have a choice. You can work towards making her lose her sanity. Not hard if you know the buttons as she is so near the edge now; or more charitably look for a new job. (I would personally choose the first as I like playing with people, but as a Catholic it is best to stick with the second option.) You cannot change people who are really just nasty bullies.
 
What is so cool about Catholicism is that it comes with alot of tools. Include this in your rosary intentions. Sprinkle Holy water around the office or blessed salt. Ask your gaurdian angel to intercede.:highprayer:
 
Change jobs. This person has no consideration for you. Do not stay too much longer in this situation, it is contrary to your Christian values. Praying for you to get away from an environment that is not honoring God.
 
walnutleviosa said:
Not sure where I should post this but I’ll put it here. Two months ago I took a job in a small office (just me and my manager). I like the work that I do butt here are several problems: my manager constantly put me down and take out her anger on me. I talk to her about it, she is apologetic but then does it again and again. Problem two is that she is constantly cursing and discussing things that are not appropriate and it embarrasses me. I try to tell her nicely that I do not like it but she tells me to kiss her you know what. I cannot leave because I have to work for a living. I am depressed going in everyday because I have to deal with this. She claims to be catholic but would not even give up on the cursing for lent. Any advice is helpful.
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Start looking for another job and quit without notice; it doesn’t sound like there is much of a future at this one for you plus you have to put up with a hostile work environment.
 
I doubt you will last, anyway, and just as well. You will probably reach a point when you have had enough of being belittled at every turn and lose your temper.

I agree that it’d be good to discreetly begin looking for work somewhere else.
 
Instead of immediately changing jobs or quitting, isn’t there a higher up you can talk to? Doesn’t she have a boss or someone she answers to? If she does, then maybe you should tell him/her that you are extremely uncomfortable working with your manager.
 
kb360 said:
Instead of immediately changing jobs or quitting, isn’t there a higher up you can talk to? Doesn’t she have a boss or someone she answers to? If she does, then maybe you should tell him/her that you are extremely uncomfortable working with your manager.
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Excellent and pertinent advice! However, sometimes we’re are in a situation where discretion is truly the better part of valour. Only the OP can know if it is worth it to take action and perhaps (unfairly!) suffer consequences from that action.

It would be so great if situations were black and white, but so often there are myriad things to consider. My prayers are with the OP and with anyone suffering from bullying and/or inappropriate situations at work. So stressful… :imsorry:
 
I’ve been in similar situations. I am in the military so I am around a lot of people who curse and discuss inappropriate things. I have found it has made me a better Catholic. I have learned to love those who are extremely different than me and to be a shining example of what a Catholic should look like. It does get noticed, even if you don’t think it does. Are there days I just want to scream, of course, but pressure makes diamonds. Perhaps this is one of the cross’ you must bare. I say take this bad situation and use it as an opportunity to become a better Catholic, and perhaps through your example make your supervisor a better Catholic. Good Luck!
 
If the environment is affecting your mental health, I suggest that you look for another job doing similar work. After a while the negative attitudes will bring you down. Unfortunately no matter where you go, there is bound to be some conflict or stress but if this job is causing you depression then it is better start looking for another job and see what happens. If you don’t the depression will worsen and who knows it could cause you to become unable to work.

As Christians we are called to love our neighbour but sometimes the best way to do it is simply change jobs and find something better.

SG
 
How about Joseph? He was in one bad situation after another but his trust in God helped him to make an impact on everyone he met. Sometimes bad situations are just God inviting us to become better.
 
walnutleviosa said:
Not sure where I should post this but I’ll put it here. Two months ago I took a job in a small office (just me and my manager). I like the work that I do butt here are several problems: my manager constantly put me down and take out her anger on me. I talk to her about it, she is apologetic but then does it again and again. Problem two is that she is constantly cursing and discussing things that are not appropriate and it embarrasses me. I try to tell her nicely that I do not like it but she tells me to kiss her you know what. I cannot leave because I have to work for a living. I am depressed going in everyday because I have to deal with this. She claims to be catholic but would not even give up on the cursing for lent. Any advice is helpful.
Click to expand...
I’m a bit late in replying to this thread, but I felt I had something to say since I’m in a similar situation. While I’m not targetted personally, I really feel for you. Your boss’s behaviour is completely innapropriate. The best advice I can give you is to leave the situation before it starts to affect your physical health. When it gets to that point it’s very difficult to have the strength to change jobs or to look for other options. I would suggest applying for other jobs before it starts to have repercussions on your health. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope you can find a better environment soon. C.
 
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