Well I haven’t been faced with birth control, but I can empathize with you, because I have had decisions concerning my faith like this that seemed impossible. All I can say is pray, pray, and pray some more. Be sure and tell God exactly how you feel, but be open to whatever he has to say to you. I honestly don’t know anything about contraception, at least not enough to be of much more help to you. I strongly suggest you talk to your priest about this, and maybe research it more yourself. It is only possible to provide so much help/counseling over the internet, because we really know so little about you. I will certainly keep you in my prayers. If nothing else, rejoice and be thankful to the Lord that you have found Him in his true Church, and that you are struggling to follow him. Christ’s peace be with you!