Birthday/Christmas Gifts for Nieces and Nephews Over Time

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I am looking for (name removed by moderator)ut on what you have done in your family.

I am married and most of our mutual nieces and nephews have reached the age of adulthood/have a job now. One nephew who is out of college is now engaged to be married…no date set yet.

We have always given birthday gifts to all of them. Now we have my nephew’s fiancee to add to the group. If this happend in your family, how did you decide how long you would continue giving birthday gifts. Although I adore my nephew’s fiancee, we are thinking that as time goes on and the others get engaged/married things are going to get complicated/overwhelming.

Right now we’re thinking about continuing Bday gifts until they are married, but not the fiancee(s). The latter is because just because someone gets engaged doesn’t mean marriage is around the corner…it could be years before it’s finalized. Wrt Christmas gifts, we would continue until married and then give a couple gift after they are married.

What say you? TIA.
 
You are being and have been very generous as an uncle and aunt!

Our budget doesn’t allow us to give gifts to extended family but we have anyway for birthdays and Christmas and sometimes other times during the year here and there. The oldest is in elementary school. As more are added we will probably stop as it is becoming amazingly expensive.

I have one relative who still sends me birthday gifts, but they don’t send anything for my Dh or kid’s birthdays. And I would never expect they do either.
 
We gave up on bday gifts long ago (last count we have over 70 neices and nephews).

Birthday cards through the mail are awesome for all ages - who doesn’t like getting “real” mail? We have use an inexpensive greeting card program and make custom ones. For children through age 18, we try to include a dollar or two. (Not trying to be stingy - just a on a limited budget). Beyond that they get just a card.

For Christmas gifts we stick to those 10 and under, and keep it in the $5-$8 range. Ages 11 thru high school get a token treat (ex. decorated candy, a candy cane with a card & a half dollar, etc.) - you know, just something to acknowledge them.

Post-high school, they are adults and all adults just participate in a gag gift exchange. Married, engaged, dating, just-a-friend, etc. are all invited to participate in that as well.
 
Our family, once you graduate from high school, birthday gifts are a thing of the past. Cards are different. Weddings and babies are also still on the agenda.
 
Thank you all for chiming in…your comments have made me feel less guilty about drawing a line (I am specifically feeling badly about leaving out my future niece-in-law).

Do you think it is fair for us to give my nephew a birthday gift even though we did not get her one (we gave her a card)? I don’t want her to think it’s something personal, you know?
 
We stopped giving gifts to neices and nephews once there were six or seven of them. Now on both sides there are over 30, so it’s totally out of the question! (We drew names at Christmas.)

However, it has always been our practice to buy Christmas gifts for our Godchildren up until the age of 18. I think that is completely reasonable.
 
PatriceA said:
Our family, once you graduate from high school, birthday gifts are a thing of the past. Cards are different. Weddings and babies are also still on the agenda.
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Same here, at least from aunts/uncles. Weddings, babies, and graduations (college) were still gift-giving occasions.
 
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