Calling or Anxiety?

[TruthInvesti]

I’m sure this is a regular question. But I’m seeing the perfect girl right now, I’ve known her for years, and in the last 3-4 months we’ve become romantically involved. This is someone I could see marrying, and I think that’s a reasonable statement to make at this point because we’ve been best friends for over a year and friends for three. We are about a week from officially going public on our relationship. However, over the last month I’ve been unable to shake feelings of intense concern about a calling to a priesthood. I can’t tell if this is a “grass is greener on the other side/cold feet” type of thing or what. I struggle not to think about it every second of the day honestly - I tend to overthink things a lot in general. Yet, things are normally better when I’m with her. There a number of reasons this situation can be stressful though outside of vocational discernment, such as some familial disapproval (that’s a long, complex story). I’ve asked a similar question on a different thread, but I wanted to specially ask in this thread if a calling to the priesthood would produce such intense anxiety and honestly turmoil, or if it would be less painful? Basically I’m asking what is characteristic of a calling to the priesthood if anyone has insight.

Full disclosure, I started having these concerns in adoration, which seem to lend validity to them. I’m not sure what to do, I am meeting with a priest soon. I’d rather not give her up but I also don’t want to waste my life.

 

[Cloisters]

Go talk to the diocesan vocations director. Only the diocese can send you to the seminary to study for them.

There is such a thing as being the priest of the family. That’s the “priesthood of the laity”.

Visit a seminary and see how it feels. If you feel as if you’ve 100 percent come home, you’re likely called.

Does your girlfriend understand this struggle? Has she ever considered becoming a nun?

Blessings,
Mrs Cloisters OP
Lay Dominican
http://cloisters.tripod.com/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/charity/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/holyangels/id9.html/

 

[CoffeeCatholic]

I’ve been unable to shake feelings of intense concern about a calling to a priesthood.

… no, this isn’t actually a normal anxiety when you are deciding to turn a 3 year friendship into a dating situation. Most people turning their long term friendship into dating feel the overwhelming excitement and love for that person. Not a ‘whoa! I think I might want to be a priest!’ feeling.

Friends for 3 years, best friends for 1 and now making it a dating situation wouldn’t usually bring this particular ‘intense’ feeling about a calling. So… I’m thinking maybe the calling is real. The calling is the Spirit. And thinking that a sit down with your local priest is absolutely a great idea! It wouldn’t be fair to your best friend to enter a dating situation and girlfriend situation if your heart, mind and soul is truly called to be a priest. You would break her heart, cause some undue pain and you would also be a very unhappy person trying to force yourself into a relationship when God has called you to another vocation.

However, if it’s just anxiety about being in a relationship, then after speaking to your priest and truly discerning ‘anxiety’ or ‘calling’ you hopefully will feel some peace inside either direction.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Email, text or call the office of Vocations at your Diocese. Enter a conversation.