Can I attend my brother's wedding?

[yngives]

I have a question about attending a wedding ceremony. I have read the rules about attending weddings on Catholic Answers which say that you are not expressly forbidden from attending an invalid marriage, that you have to use your own judgment. But I’m not sure about my family’s situation.

My brother is a fallen away Catholic who attends a Lutheran church. He is getting married by a Lutheran pastor without a dispensation. I know this is an invalid marriage. I have discussed this with him, as well. I feel that I want to attend because my brother has begun to show signs that he may come back to the Catholic Church sometime in the future and I don’t want to push him away. Out of respect for my mom and I he actually did attempt to get a dispensation of form. But he started a little too late so that won’t happen before the ceremony. I’ve talked to him about getting his marriage blessed and he seems open to considering that. I would like to go to keep the lines of communication open to return to the Church. I have/will let my younger siblings know that my attending the ceremony does not mean I agree with the way he is getting “married” but because I don’t want to make him so angry/hurt that he never gets married in the Church. I just want to make sure that I’m not committing a sin.

Also would it be permissible to attend the bridal shower? Thank you for your help.

 

[texasnan]

The main point, IMO, of not attending an invalid marriage, is so that you don’t appear to be supporting it. But you’ve already made your thoughts clear to your brother. Since he seems open to returning to the Church, I would go.

I have a question about attending a wedding ceremony. I have read the rules about attending weddings on Catholic Answers which say that you are not expressly forbidden from attending an invalid marriage, that you have to use your own judgment. But I’m not sure about my family’s situation.

My brother is a fallen away Catholic who attends a Lutheran church. He is getting married by a Lutheran pastor without a dispensation. I know this is an invalid marriage. I have discussed this with him, as well. I feel that I want to attend because my brother has begun to show signs that he may come back to the Catholic Church sometime in the future and I don’t want to push him away. Out of respect for my mom and I he actually did attempt to get a dispensation of form. But he started a little too late so that won’t happen before the ceremony. I’ve talked to him about getting his marriage blessed and he seems open to considering that. I would like to go to keep the lines of communication open to return to the Church. I have/will let my younger siblings know that my attending the ceremony does not mean I agree with the way he is getting “married” but because I don’t want to make him so angry/hurt that he never gets married in the Church. I just want to make sure that I’m not committing a sin.

Also would it be permissible to attend the bridal shower? Thank you for your help.

 

[johnnykins]

I have a question about attending a wedding ceremony. I have read the rules about attending weddings on Catholic Answers which say that you are not expressly forbidden from attending an invalid marriage, that you have to use your own judgment. But I’m not sure about my family’s situation.

My brother is a fallen away Catholic who attends a Lutheran church. He is getting married by a Lutheran pastor without a dispensation. I know this is an invalid marriage. I have discussed this with him, as well. I feel that I want to attend because my brother has begun to show signs that he may come back to the Catholic Church sometime in the future and I don’t want to push him away. Out of respect for my mom and I he actually did attempt to get a dispensation of form. But he started a little too late so that won’t happen before the ceremony. I’ve talked to him about getting his marriage blessed and he seems open to considering that. I would like to go to keep the lines of communication open to return to the Church. I have/will let my younger siblings know that my attending the ceremony does not mean I agree with the way he is getting “married” but because I don’t want to make him so angry/hurt that he never gets married in the Church. I just want to make sure that I’m not committing a sin.

Also would it be permissible to attend the bridal shower? Thank you for your help.

Go - based on what you posted. Whatever we do in such circumstances is what is, to the best of our judgment, best suited to bring your brother back to the faith while not leading others away from the faith. (Scandal is something that leads others away from the faith.) In this day and age I can hardly imagine going to the wedding or the shower being a cause of scandal. I can easily see not going erecting a wall between you, your brother and his new wife.

Certainly there is no absolutely clear answer, but IMHO the pastoral - the prudent and proper - thing to do under the circumstances you describe is go, be supportive and loving.

 

[DeepeningFaith]

This is a tricky question. Therefore, I can’t give more than my opinion.

Pastorally - GO

As a man that looks to the law of Christ’s Church - DONT GO

You decide. Or better yet, take the responsibility for this action off of you. As your Parish Priest and then consult your conscience.

God bless!