Can I be the best man?

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Gavin

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Hello, My best friend is non denominational and is marrying a girl who converted from Catholicism to non denominationalism. He wants me to be the best man but I am a devout Catholic. So does anyone know if I’m allowed to be the best man if it’s not a Catholic wedding?
 
I would probably advise against it as it isn’t a valid marriage, if she is a Catholic who has not received a dispensation from form. It also troubles me when Catholics leave the faith and I don’t want to support them in that.

But, I could also see talking to her and letting her know that me standing up in the wedding shouldn’t be taken as approval of her leaving the Church but rather support for my friend and then telling him “yes”. Depends on how well you know her.

Ultimately it’s a prudential judgment on your part.
 
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As far as I know there’s no rule against participating in non-Catholic weddings. At least I hope so, since I was a groomsman in my Jewish friends wedding…
 
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RolandThompsonGunner said:
As far as I know there’s no rule against participating in non-Catholic weddings. At least I hope so, since I was a groomsman in my Jewish friends wedding…
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Yes, but was your Jewish friend or his bride Catholic and married outside the Church without dispensation? This is different and cannot be condoned by a Catholic.
 
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Fauken said:
Yes, but was your Jewish friend or his bride Catholic and married outside the Church without dispensation?
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His wife is Catholic, but a priest from her family did a blessing as part of the wedding in conjunction with the rabbi, so presumably she got the appropriate dispensations.

Anyway, OP, I like 1ke’s suggestion. If you know her well enough, maybe gently tell her you’re honored to be asked to be best man, but you want to encourage her not to abandon the church. I don’t know, I feel like declining is just going to make the odds of her returning to the church worse, not better. I feel like you can accept while gracefully pointing out the issue (maybe she was only ever nominally Catholic and doesn’t get it) and hopefully planting the seeds for a reversion.
1ke said:
But this isn’t a “non Catholic wedding”.
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I meant the ceremony isn’t Catholic.
 
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