Can I go to confession (first time)

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marshmallowfluff

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I was baptised but never raised catholic and as a result never did my first communion, confession or confirmation. However in the past year I have found God and have gone to mass when i can.
I am now 18 (still a student). Can I go to confession (would be first time) without speaking to the Priest first, or something like that, ie. just turn up and do the whole confession?
If not, how would you advise I go about going to confession for the first time?
 
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Your best course of action would be to contact a Priest and ask for their guidance so he can help you properly prepare for your first confession and future sacraments.
 
How do I know what to do? Like should I look it up or something? I do want to go but I’m scared to…
 
Don’t be afraid…God’s mercy is something to be happy about, not to fear.

Google “how to make a catholic confession” and I bet something will come up…but I wouldn’t even worry about it…make an appointment with your priest, and tell him this is your first confession.

Nine years ago when I entered into full communion, that’s how I did it…The priest lit up, and was kind and gentle and walked me through every step! He was as happy to be hearing my first confession as I was in making it! I’m betting its the same for all our holy priests!
 
My instincts say that you should go. If it turns out to be an “invalid confession” for some reason, nothing is lost. If it turns out to be valid then praise be to God.

Whatever you decide to do, consider the following:

Prior to confession, you should do an examination of conscience to determine what your sins are, or might be (google it).

When you confess, you must be willing to admit that you actually sinned, and inform the priest of every sin (or type of sin) that you remember.

You must be truly sorry for your sins, and have an intention in your heart never to sin again.

You will probably need to pray an “act of contrition”.

If the priest gives you a penance, you must complete it or the confession is not “finished.”

God bless you, and may things work out well for your faith journey.
 
You really should contact a priest first and see about getting some additional formation for the sacraments. You really need to be confirmed and receive your first communion, and confession will be part of the preparation for that.

The people telling you to just go to confession are well intentioned, but incorrect.

-Fr ACEGC
 
A few years ago, I was teaching a high school age 1st communion / reconciliation class. A very distraught male student came to me privately and told me that he had “a friend”. This “friend” had just shot, and possibly murdered someone in a gang related thing. He told me that his friend was filled with remorse, and wanted to go to confession. I suppose he was concerned that he might himself be killed himself in retaliation.

I went to the DRE (Director of Religious Education) and told her what was happening. Her response was “He hasn’t been through the program yet. The answer is NO. He can’t go to confession.” I suggested that she check with the pastor. She said that the answer was NO, and that was that. I suggested that I go to the pastor, and the answer was NO. I don’t know what happened after that.

I agree that additional formation is desirable, of course. But the incident above got me to thinking about “how ready is ready?” What “bad” could come out of going to Confession if one truly desires / needs it.

Many people go through the whole RCIA, or 1st Communion/Reconciliation process and learn nothing, they don’t have a clue, they don’t care, they go because their parents make them go.
 
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marshmallowfluff said:
How do I know what to do? Like should I look it up or something? I do want to go but I’m scared to…
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Go speak with a priest and follow his direction. Tell him what you told us, he will know what you need to do to make a good valid confession.
 
That’s a very extraordinary case and wouldn’t really be applicable here. We can’t establish general principles based on the extremes.
 
Is one of the general principals that one “must complete the program” before confession? If so, is it required that they take a test to ensure that they “got it?”

Of course more is required before Communion, but the OP wasn’t asking for that.

I ask this - what is the down side of hearing a confession of someone who hasn’t gone through the program? The priest would obviously suggest that more education should be pursued, but that’s what everybody should be doing anyway, regardless of sacraments received, or not.

As a non-priest, I can only relate to a hypothetical child who asks her father to forgive her sins against him. Does he respond “You don’t know enough, you are not worthy enough for me to listen to you, go to RE class and come back, and then we can talk?”

The OP’s desire for Confession is very unusual and very uplifting. I hope this all turns out OK. And it could be that there is a very powerful back-story to all this that we don’t know about.
 
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You should know the poster above you is a priest and knows the proper way to go about a first confession.

No one on this thread has said the OP has to go through a “program” however, the OP must have some preparation to receive the sacrament.
 
This isn’t just about making sure people “go through the program,” as you say. It’s about making sure that people are properly catechized and disposed to receive the sacraments. The OP’s desire for confession is indeed uplifting. But desire alone does not equate to proper preparation. We benefit most from the sacraments when we are properly disposed, and we pay the greatest reverence to them when we ensure our good disposition. So naturally some preparation is warranted, both in general–we have to be educated before we receive a sacrament–and in particular–we should examine our consciences before confession.

I think you’re being a little overdramatic. The situation you described does not equate to that of the OP. The OP is someone who was baptized and never received the other sacraments. Absent danger of death, the proper course of action is to have that person go through some kind of formation and to be admitted to the sacraments. The situation you describe is extraordinary, and again, we can’t make general principles based on the extremes. In general, preparation is good. In certain cases, preparation may be more limited or even waived altogether. The OP’s situation does not seem to be one of those cases.

-Father ACEGC
 
edward_george1 said:
I think you’re being a little overdramatic. The situation you described does not equate to that of the OP.
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As much as I enjoy CAF and see it as a good resource, I think this speaks of the inherent weakness of this or any other social media website, in that none of us, regardless of our credentials, from a brief exchange with any originating poster can make a determination concerning the validity of someone’s situation…

OP make an appointment with your priest where you can have a deeper conversation on the matter.
 
I don’t think I said anyone’s situation was valid or invalid. I just said that “needs to go to confession urgently because someone’s life was in danger” was not the same as “baptized, but not confirmed or communed and wants to go to confession now.” And that is true. And in the parish, I would handle these things, in person, very differently. In the former case, I would admit them to confession post haste. In the latter case, I would feel no urgency about making sure they were properly prepared.

It’s a wonder that I’m a priest who actually has done priest things with my life, and yet somehow it’s a cause for controversy when I describe how they ought to be handled. Of course next people will be questioning whether I’m really a priest at all. Oh well. C’est la vie.
 
edward_george1 said:
Absent danger of death, the proper course of action is to have that person go through some kind of formation and to be admitted to the sacraments.
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I think this is very important. A person who has never made a Confession shouldn’t attempt to make a Sacramental Confession without some instruction and guidance.
 
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