Can you make a mistake?

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rayne100

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My question is one of a simple one. Say you feel called to become a nun, priest or brother, Etc…
You have gone throught an extensive discrnment period and feel that God is pulling you toward a vocation, but once you begin that vocation, you realize you may have made a mistake. What happens then?
does this happen often?
 
There are two things that come to mind for me.

First of all, you’re not making the decision alone. It’s not only that you feel called to the priesthood or a religious community, but also that they feel you are called to the community. There is discernment on both sides.

More importantly, by taking the first step of applying and either entering the seminary or the religious community, you are committing yourself to continuing to discern whether God is calling you. If you are interested in becoming a priest you will not be ordained immediately. If you are interested in a religious community you will go through stages of postulancy, the novitiate, and temporary vows. At each stage both you and the community will be making decisions.

I think that if you believe you are called to religious life you should explore the possibilities.
 
SuscipeMeDomine said:
There are two things that come to mind for me.

First of all, you’re not making the decision alone. It’s not only that you feel called to the priesthood or a religious community, but also that they feel you are called to the community. There is discernment on both sides.

More importantly, by taking the first step of applying and either entering the seminary or the religious community, you are committing yourself to continuing to discern whether God is calling you. If you are interested in becoming a priest you will not be ordained immediately. If you are interested in a religious community you will go through stages of postulancy, the novitiate, and temporary vows. At each stage both you and the community will be making decisions.

I think that if you believe you are called to religious life you should explore the possibilities.
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Thank you for your answer. I do not particularly feel called as of yet, however the vocations do facinate me.

One more question, I’m sorry if these are stupid questions:
What would one do if they owned property had a job etc…
Would you be required to sell your home? quit your job? would you live at the monestary or convent ?
 
rayne100 said:
Thank you for your answer. I do not particularly feel called as of yet, however the vocations do facinate me.

One more question, I’m sorry if these are stupid questions:
What would one do if they owned property had a job etc…
Would you be required to sell your home? quit your job? would you live at the monestary or convent ?
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Eventually, yes, you would have to sell your house or car (or give them away) and quit your secular job. However, nowadays people go through some pretty formal descernmentbefore they reach that stage.

And even in the olden days you would have talked to the parish priest, your family, and the order you felt called to enter for some time before making that decision. And there have always been people who, for one reason or another, were rejected by an order or who quit.
 
Sr_Sally said:
Eventually, yes, you would have to sell your house or car (or give them away) and quit your secular job. However, nowadays people go through some pretty formal descernmentbefore they reach that stage.

And even in the olden days you would have talked to the parish priest, your family, and the order you felt called to enter for some time before making that decision. And there have always been people who, for one reason or another, were rejected by an order or who quit.
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Wow i would think that being rejected by an order would be quite a harsh blow to your psyche.

BTW- thank you for the answer 😃
 
And they know that so it’s not something they do lightly.

As far as getting rid of your property, in part that depends on what type of vocation you’re called to. My understanding is that diocesan priests do not take a vow of poverty so they could own more things. Religious orders do take a vow of poverty so you would have to dispose of it in some way.
 
rayne100 said:
Wow i would think that being rejected by an order would be quite a harsh blow to your psyche.
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Well, it doesn’t have to be. 🙂 St. Therese of Liseux’s parents were both rejected by orders. They married and produced daughters (their sons all died) who became religious, one of them a great Saint. So, no matter what vocation God has for any one of us, religious or not, God can do wonderful things in our lives if we let him.
 
Every priest I know of who left the priesthood says the same thing…that they simply, “made a mistake.” Personally, I have a hard time buying that. Seminary formation is a loooooooooong, detailed, and very thorough process. Priests who leave (on good terms) most often get caught in the trap of letting their spiritual life fade away, losing their priestly identity, focusing too much on things that have nothing to do with their ministry, don’t take time off to recharge the batteries, and concern themselves with their will and not God’s will. It may sound a bit harsh, but I have no doubt that the evil one is at the root of their “mistake.” So please…pray for priests!!!

Fr. Joe
 
It does nothing to dwell on the past and think about the life you could have had provided you had made a different decision. I think God does have a plan for us, and sometimes we live up to it through His grace, or we don’t through our own sin. However, once a priest, always a priest, and it would be helpful to see how God is working through you now and to find out how it is that you can follow God’s will and bring about the most good while on this earth.

I regret many things about my past… I have made many mistakes, but I can never say that those experiences have been totally detrimental for I am a better person today because of them. To some extent, I am grateful for them.

I have heard stories of men who became married and opened up that they felt called to the priesthood, and felt like they made a mistake in getting married. It wouldn’t be uncommon to feel like this. But the important thing is not to dwell on a decision you can’t change, but focusing on your life now, making sure that you are doing everything you can to live up to God’s will.

God does have a plan for you still. It is God’s providence that “everything happens for a reason.” No matter what we do, we cannot violate His providence. Good is wrought from everything we do, whether we want it to or not.

Take comfort in that. 👍 God is all powerful and He is using you for His own sake, for the sake of the salvation of all.
 
I think we’re called to follow where God leads. He could lead someone to seminary for a time. I’m aquainted w/ several men who spent some time in seminary, then left. None are angry or bitter. They feel God had them in seminary for a reason and the formation they received will help them in life.

It’s not time wasted by any means. —KCT
 
There are many people who enter seminary or religious life, test it out for a period, maybe even make it to the brink of ordination… then realize that it is not for them, afterall.

Was a mistake made? I don’t think so. Rather, a following of God’s Will to the point that it led them occurred. What happens next? Well, that also is part of the journey. Sometimes one who walks away from such a vocation knows very clearly where s/he is headed and why. Other times, there is a period of insecurity or wandering. This, too, is discernment.

Now, that isn’t to say that one doesn’t need to persevere in prayer and dedication. As Fr. Joe rightly noted, more than a few priests have left ministry perhaps because they just couldn’t handle it’s rigors and got burnt out or rusted out; because they got drawn away by some worldly concern, a woman; because they let their prayer life wither and didn’t allow God to be in charge. Others entered and somehow got ordained for, perhaps, the wrong reasons or with a faulty understanding of what could/would be.

So, it happens. But, yes, it’s a lengthy journey. And you have checkpoints to help you understand if this is the road to continue down or not. There will be highs and lows in any way of life, and this all is no different. All one can do is take it a step at a time, and see where God leads.
 
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