Canon Law & Taking kids to Mass

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We are Baptizing our 3rd child tomorrow. I was given some forms to sign. On one of the papers it said parents who are Baptizing their children are committing to take their child to Mass every Sunday and on Holy days of obligation. It went on to mention other things and cited the Canon laws that applied (but there wasn’t a specific one cited about taking kids to Mass every Sunday).

On other threads I’ve always heard it said that kids are only obligated to go to Mass once they reach the age of reason.The papers I were given made it sound like this is not true and we need to bring our infant to every Mass once she is Baptized.

Now, I agree its of course best to take your children to Mass. However, we have some very trying days when our children are toddlers and sometimes have split up Mass and left the “problem child” at home that week. We needed to do this with our second child for several months around 18 months of age because we were spending all Mass going in and out with him because of his behavior. One parent or the other was completely missing Mass so we split up. Now he does much better and this isnt necessary but if this were to ever happen again with one of our kids I’d like to know what my obligations are.

Is there any Canon law backing this up or was it poorly worded and just meant we need to bring our kids up in the faith and part of that includes going to Mass (once they hit the age of reason)?
 
“Merely ecclesiastical laws bind those who have been baptized in the Catholic Church or received into it, possess the efficient use of reason, and, unless the law expressly provides otherwise, have completed seven years of age.”
[CIC Can.11]

As the Sunday Obligation is an ecclesiastical law, you are correct to assume that the Sunday Obligation does not apply in the case of your children below age 7.
 
Oh, and by the way, thanks for giving this question serious thought. A lot of folks will bring their kids even if the kids having a full-blown tantrum, and keep 'em in the pews.

Now, I have a three month old baby, and a four year old with autism… I think they are far below the age of reason, and so, they would present more of a disruption to the Mass more than anything…
.... so they ain't going for a while.
 
This is most likely a case where the parish has had people in the past, show up asking for Baptism, who never have any intention of coming back. They Baptize because of family pressure, or because they believe it “covers their bases”. You obviously are practicing Catholics. We have a class that parents and Godparents must take…a couple hours on a Saturday, so that they can be instructed on the importance of living our your Catholic faith. Your parish just puts it in writing. A lot of folks just don’t “get it”.
It’s sad that the Church feels like this. But you can’t believe how many families just stop coming entirely after Baptism. They turn up for First Communion, and disappear again until Confirmation.
There are many happy, and faith-filled families. But those who are not completely engaged in their faith cause directives like this to be put into place. Try no to take it too personally.
Congratulations! May your and your dear family be blessed.
👍
 
There are many Sundays during which I would not be able to attend Mass without taking my very willful grandchild, who by the way is a baptized Catholic and for whom the promise was made to raise her Catholic. Sitting with a squiggly toddler is not easy, and I try to balance slipping out if she gets too noisy against staying in our back-row pew long enough to get her more accustomed to the expected behaviors. Several times, though, I have had one lady or another turn and pointedly glower at me whenever my grandchild made just a little fuss. It is a good thing I am a determined Catholic because had I been a visitor to a church where people acted so unkindly, I would never have returned.
 
pianistclare said:
…
It’s sad that the Church feels like this. But you can’t believe how many families just stop coming entirely after Baptism. They turn up for First Communion, and disappear again until Confirmation. …
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You left out their wedding and funeral. It used to referred to a “Hatched, Matched and Dispatched.” 😃
 
I think you are reading too much into the paper.

Yes, it is your responsibility to take your children to Mass on Sundays and Holy Days. And it seems that the parish is trying to impress this responsibility upon those who approach the Church for baptism.

Don’t be too literal minded though. Yes, we should strive to bring them weekly, even when they are below the age at which they are canonically obligated. But, we are excused for many reasons such as illness, care of infants, etc.

.
 
Joe_Kelley said:
Feel free. I don’t remember where I stole it from.
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Did a quick check. That phrase was used here at CAF at least as early as December of 2004.

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=369150#post369150
40.png
tom.wineman:
What about the triode Catholics ?
The ones that only see the inside of a
church three times in their lives— when
they are hatched, matched and dispatched .
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I remember my former pastor using that phrase (or one similar to it) back in the late 1980s and the 1990s.
 
Adirondacks518 said:
Oh, and by the way, thanks for giving this question serious thought. A lot of folks will bring their kids even if the kids having a full-blown tantrum, and keep 'em in the pews.

Now, I have a three month old baby, and a four year old with autism… I think they are far below the age of reason, and so, they would present more of a disruption to the Mass more than anything…
Code: 
   .... so they ain't going for a while.
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Hmmmmm Is it wrong to take little ones to Church? Is there a behavior standard?
 
BIB_MT said:
We are Baptizing our 3rd child tomorrow. I was given some forms to sign. On one of the papers it said parents who are Baptizing their children are committing to take their child to Mass every Sunday and on Holy days of obligation. It went on to mention other things and cited the Canon laws that applied (but there wasn’t a specific one cited about taking kids to Mass every Sunday).

On other threads I’ve always heard it said that kids are only obligated to go to Mass once they reach the age of reason.The papers I were given made it sound like this is not true and we need to bring our infant to every Mass once she is Baptized.

Now, I agree its of course best to take your children to Mass. However, we have some very trying days when our children are toddlers and sometimes have split up Mass and left the “problem child” at home that week. We needed to do this with our second child for several months around 18 months of age because we were spending all Mass going in and out with him because of his behavior. One parent or the other was completely missing Mass so we split up. Now he does much better and this isnt necessary but if this were to ever happen again with one of our kids I’d like to know what my obligations are.

Is there any Canon law backing this up or was it poorly worded and just meant we need to bring our kids up in the faith and part of that includes going to Mass (once they hit the age of reason)?
Click to expand...
Here is what I would do. I would treat this as a request from a specific parish to please bring your children to Mass. I would consider it as binding as if a Priest personally told me he wished it. It probably is not tied to “official” Church teaching. But is there a problem with obeying this request. A priest has a duty to make sure children are going to be raised in the faith before granting baptism. If his way of assurance is to see your smiling and your child’s sometimes crying faces in the pews. Why not!?
 
The Sunday Obligation is canon 1247 of the Code of Canon Law.

Can. 1247 On Sundays and other holy days of obligation, the faithful are obliged to participate in the Mass.

Moreover, they are to abstain from those works and aVairs which hinder the worship to be rendered to God, the joy proper to the Lord’s day, or the suitable relaxation of mind and body.

Can. 1248 §1. A person who assists at a Mass celebrated anywhere in a Catholic rite either on the feast day itself or in the evening of the preceding day satisfies the obligation of participating in the Mass.

§2. If participation in the eucharistic celebration becomes impossible because of the absence of a sacred minister or for another grave cause, it is strongly recommended that the faithful take part in a liturgy of the word if such a liturgy is celebrated in a parish church or other sacred place according to the prescripts of the diocesan bishop or that they devote themselves to prayer for a suitable time alone, as a family, or, as the occasion permits, in groups of families.

(From vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/_P4N.HTM ).

As posted above, this obligation binds Catholics who are at least seven years old and have the use of reason.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church, n. 2181, lists “the care of infants” as a reason someone need not attend Mass on Sunday. (At vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s2c1a3.htm ).

An approach in Tools for Rebuilding is: “Just providing a nursery program for babies and little children gives couples a break and a breather from relentless parenting, and it makes your church experience worthwhile for them, … Eventually, they’ll come to know and appreciate the Eucharistic celebration in a way that they had not before (and might not ever if they’re chasing the kids around during Mass).” (Tools for Rebuilding, by Fr Michael White and Tom Corcoran, Ave Maria Press, 2013, ISBN 1594714444, page 176).
 
John_Lilburne said:
The Sunday Obligation is canon 1247 of the Code of Canon Law.
Can. 1247 On Sundays and other holy days of obligation, the faithful are obliged to participate in the Mass.

Moreover, they are to abstain from those works and aVairs which hinder the worship to be rendered to God, the joy proper to the Lord’s day, or the suitable relaxation of mind and body.

Can. 1248 §1. A person who assists at a Mass celebrated anywhere in a Catholic rite either on the feast day itself or in the evening of the preceding day satisfies the obligation of participating in the Mass.

§2. If participation in the eucharistic celebration becomes impossible because of the absence of a sacred minister or for another grave cause, it is strongly recommended that the faithful take part in a liturgy of the word if such a liturgy is celebrated in a parish church or other sacred place according to the prescripts of the diocesan bishop or that they devote themselves to prayer for a suitable time alone, as a family, or, as the occasion permits, in groups of families.(From vatican.va/archive/ENG1104/_P4N.HTM ).

As posted above, this obligation binds Catholics who are at least seven years old and have the use of reason.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church, n. 2181, lists “the care of infants” as a reason someone need not attend Mass on Sunday. (At vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s2c1a3.htm ).

An approach in Tools for Rebuilding is: “Just providing a nursery program for babies and little children gives couples a break and a breather from relentless parenting, and it makes your church experience worthwhile for them, … Eventually, they’ll come to know and appreciate the Eucharistic celebration in a way that they had not before (and might not ever if they’re chasing the kids around during Mass).” (Tools for Rebuilding, by Fr Michael White and Tom Corcoran, Ave Maria Press, 2013, ISBN 1594714444, page 176).
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The authors of this book also recommend making aggressive announcements regarding the availability and use of cry rooms, as well as having appointed busybodies…er… volunteers to ask people to leave if their children get too noisy. While some parents might like this approach, this would not make me feel welcomed in that parish, and I, personally, would be inclined to not return to that parish. (Note: I always leave when my children are noisy, and return when I believe they will be calm. Sometimes, I misjudge that and end up coming and going many times.)

Simply because a child does not have an obligation to attend Mass does not mean that the child cannot benefit from attending Mass and the lack of obligation is no reason to stay away, if the parents feel able to bring the child.
 
Hoosier_Daddy said:
Here is what I would do. I would treat this as a request from a specific parish to please bring your children to Mass. I would consider it as binding as if a Priest personally told me he wished it. It probably is not tied to “official” Church teaching. But is there a problem with obeying this request. A priest has a duty to make sure children are going to be raised in the faith before granting baptism. If his way of assurance is to see your smiling and your child’s sometimes crying faces in the pews. Why not!?
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I really like this approach.
 
babochka said:
The authors of this book also recommend making aggressive announcements regarding the availability and use of cry rooms, as well as having appointed busybodies…er… volunteers to ask people to leave if their children get too noisy. While some parents might like this approach, this would not make me feel welcomed in that parish, and I, personally, would be inclined to not return to that parish. …
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More information on their programs for children is at rebuiltparish.com/chapter7/ . They also have a podcast about it, Rebuilt Podcast Episode 3: Do Something For My Kids, You Do Something For Me, which is at rebuiltparish.com/rebuilt-podcast/page/3/ .
 
John_Lilburne said:
More information on their programs for children is at rebuiltparish.com/chapter7/ . They also have a podcast about it, Rebuilt Podcast Episode 3: Do Something For My Kids, You Do Something For Me, which is at rebuiltparish.com/rebuilt-podcast/page/3/ .
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Yeah, I’m familiar with their programs. It is just a difference in philosophy. :shrug:I think that their children’s programs are great and I applaud their innovation. I’m just concerned that families who choose to bring toddlers and young children into Mass would be made to feel unwelcome. Either choice - to bring children with you or to leave them at home (or in a nursery) is acceptable Using strong language such as “aggressive” announcements regarding cry rooms certainly gives the impression that a particular parish believes that one choice is superior to others.
 
Joe_Kelley said:
I suspect I picked it up from a sermon sometime in the 1940’s
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There was a CBC TV series called “Hatching, Matching and Dispatching” about 9 years ago. It was about a Newfoundland family that owned an ambulance service, a wedding hall and a funeral parlour. I must admit I’d never heard the expression until they started doing the publicity for that show.
 
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