Changing appearance, visible Christianity

[anticipation]

Dear all,

I was raised Protestant, and I am just beginning my early steps with a friend. Neither of us has seen a Priest yet. We are learning the prayers and starting out alone at first.

My first question, is it sacrilegious for us to practice prayer, use rosaries, etc., and to follow practices of mortification before entering RCIA?

She was wondering if it were sacrilege to put a cross up on her wall. I thought she was being a little over-sensitive.

For my part, I have been changing to more conservative dress and am about to cut off my long hair (too vain and nonconformist).
Should I wait for RCIA and spiritual guidance before doing these kinds of mortifications? To be honest, I just feel awkward in Church without a short haircut, so perhaps it’s not an issue of mortification as one of submitting to the standards of the community. I want to be traditional. And I can keep the ponytail as a symbol of my first mortification!

Second, I have a question about men and crosses. I have been reading that it is important to wear a cross visibly at all times? This is perhaps easier for women than men. What do men do to wear the cross visibly?

The humbling part is revealing to friends and families that I believe, that my life has changed. Some are atheist,; others are “too cool” for Church. I pray to God for strength, chastity, and self-denial. I used to be very skeptical, and now…so much is changing.

Thanks for listening to my naive questions.

God bless you all!

Paul.

 

[SemperFidelis]

Dear all,

I was raised Protestant, and I am just beginning my early steps with a friend. Neither of us has seen a Priest yet. We are learning the prayers and starting out alone at first.

My first question, is it sacrilegious for us to practice prayer, use rosaries, etc., and to follow practices of mortification before entering RCIA?

She was wondering if it were sacrilege to put a cross up on her wall. I thought she was being a little over-sensitive.

For my part, I have been changing to more conservative dress and am about to cut off my long hair (too vain and nonconformist).
Should I wait for RCIA and spiritual guidance before doing these kinds of mortifications? To be honest, I just feel awkward in Church without a short haircut, so perhaps it’s not an issue of mortification as one of submitting to the standards of the community. I want to be traditional. And I can keep the ponytail as a symbol of my first mortification!

Second, I have a question about men and crosses. I have been reading that it is important to wear a cross visibly at all times? This is perhaps easier for women than men. What do men do to wear the cross visibly?

The humbling part is revealing to friends and families that I believe, that my life has changed. Some are atheist,; others are “too cool” for Church. I pray to God for strength, chastity, and self-denial. I used to be very skeptical, and now…so much is changing.

Thanks for listening to my naive questions.

God bless you all!

Paul.

I don’t see any problem with doing any of the above things. I myself (just recently started RCIA by the way) was encouraged by many of the Catholics on here to do these things. It gets you into good habits that will carry over to when you do become Catholic so I see no reason why you can’t have a crucifix, pray the Rosary, etc. now. As far as losing the pony-tail, that’s up to you. The Church has nothing against them for males. It is important for you to conform to the Church, and not the other way around, so if you do feel that it is non-conformist, then chop away.

 

[Scout]

I converted a few years ago, and praying the Rosary and other prayers, and participating as much as I could, helped convince me even more that converting was the right thing to do. These practices drew me closer to Jesus and His Mother. Jesus and Our Mother used these prayers and sacrifices and encouraged and convicted me through them.

I felt like you did at the beginning-like maybe I wasn’t supposed to be doing any of those things because I wasn’t Catholic yet. However, someone pointed out that I was on the path and God will bless my efforts.

I think the same thing applies to you. The more you do, the more you’ll grow and the more you’ll want to do. You’ll just keep growing and becoming stronger in your faith and convictions. Our Lord will always allow someone to come to him.

Scout :tiphat:

 

[TheDoctor]

Hello Paul, and welcome to you and your friend on your journey. I will pray that the Lord guides you along the path to truth. To address your specific questions:It is not sacrilegious for you to practice prayer, use rosaries, etc. In fact, the more you develop your prayer life, the closer you will grow to God.

It is also not sacrilegious to put a cross on your wall (you will find that most Catholics prefer a crucifix) or an Icon or picture of Jesus, the Holy Family, Mary, or a favorite Saint or religious setting. The thing to remember is that Catholics worship none of these; they are symbols that remind and point us back to God.

Mortification is not necessary, just follow your conscience and make sure what you are doing is for the right reason, i.e. cutting your hair as a sign of change to feel more at home with your community would be OK; cutting it because you think Jesus would not accept you with long hair would not be (P.S. I doubt Jesus wore his hair “high and tight” anyway).

I know of no requirement for men to wear visible crosses. Where did you hear this?

You may find some of your closest friends will be your harshest critics. Pray for them. God may be calling you to be the light in their lives.
One last thought: You are always welcome to come and celebrate the Mass with us (just do not go up for communion). Jesus would love to see you and your friend this Sunday.

 

[PatienceAndLove]

A scapular would be a good thing to get as well. It is meant to be worn under the clothes. Google “washable scapular”. I think these last longer, especially if are a person partial to always wearing it, even when showering.
I also have never heard the visible cross/crucifix rule either. I know a lot of women wear them, but I don’t really see a lot of men who do (besides rappers in diamond crucifixes). It’s up to you if you want to.

 

[Rawb]

anticipation, don’t get caught up in rules. The Church has a great many of them, and we have to obey them as they pertain to us, but if you’re focusing on the rules you’ll only see the rules, and not Jesus who gave us the rules. You’ll get frustrated and ‘give up’.

Instead of worrying that it’s a rule that you must wear a visible crucifix at all times (which isn’t even a rule anyway, unless you’re part of a religious order that requires it) you should be worrying that your relationship with Christ is at a point where you want to wear a crucifix as a sign for yourself and others that you love Christ.

Same for putting a crucifix on your wall. You’re certainly allowed to, but are you doing it because you’re ‘supposed to’ or is it a genuine part of your faith?

The same goes for cutting your hair, and a great many other things. I encourage you to attend mass as well, just remember that you can’t recieve Holy Communion yet. You can however pray the rosary, genuflect to the tabernacle, bless yourself with Holy Water, respond to the priest, pray with the sign of the cross (before meals in public is a great way to proclaim your Catholic Faith), pray the specific prayers only Catholics have such as the Hail Mary, and observe our days of Fast and Abstinance. All of this can do nothign but bring you closer to Christ and His Church.

Remeber, whatever you do, do for love of Christ, not only because you have to. (If it is a rule, but you don’t agree with it, my strong suggestion would be to obey the rule and look into the reason why we have it more. It always makes more sense after a very little research).

Stick around and learn about Holy Mother Church, and welcome!

 

[anticipation]

Thank you all for your responses. I guess I was looking for permission to do things I want to do out of faith, but which seem bizarre to the outside world. I had a piece of good news today,and the first thing I did was pray. The second thing was to think about a trip to the barber, to look a clean-cut humble church kid from the 1950s. Oh yes, I want a humbling conservative flattop! Next, I want to give away my flashy clothes to the Church (except for the ones I need for work), and replace them with humble ones.

Rawb, thanks for the suggestion about crossing oneself in public. I feel nervous and excited. I am not a rule-obsessed person. It’s the spirit behind the words of Christ that means so much to me.

This doesn’t mean I am not obeying the rules. I am sure one of the physiological dimensions of my excitement has to do with strict chastity, which, um, has been one of the hardest parts.

Thanks again so much for your kind advice! God bless you all.

Paul