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thistle
Guest
What is the essential difference between chastity, celibacy, and continence? They all seem to be the same to me but I guess they cannot be otherwise only one word would be needed.
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mercygate
Guest
Chastity: Sexual purity in your condition of life. E.g., in marriage, chastity means enjoying one’s conjugal privileges frequently and with relish, not fantasizing about people other than your spouse, respecting the needs of your spouse, not refusing what used to be quaintly referred to as “the marriage debt.” Not demanding it either . . .
Celibacy: not being married. Celibate chastity requires continence.
Continence means refraining from sexual activity (in thought, word, and deed).
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thistle
Guest
Thanks mercygate.
If a catholic couple were, for example, in an invalid marriage (say one had been divorced, even though it was their previous spouse that did the divorcing), and in order to fully participate in the Church and be allowed to take communion they have to refrain from any sexual activity, would they take a vow of continence or celibacy?
If a catholic couple were, for example, in an invalid marriage (say one had been divorced, even though it was their previous spouse that did the divorcing), and in order to fully participate in the Church and be allowed to take communion they have to refrain from any sexual activity, would they take a vow of continence or celibacy?
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mercygate
Guest
No vow. They would practice continence. But if they are living together and it is widely known that the marriage is irregular, it would be a source of scandal to receive Communion, since it would be reasonable for people to assume that they are *not *living in continence.
The better option is to get the marriage issue straightened out so they can live in marital chastity, enjoying fully the privileges of their state in life while not being a cause of scandal to others!
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puzzleannie
Guest
they would not take a vow, but they would first go to confession, then met with their priest and explain their situation and ask his counsel in seeking a remedy. While waiting for the situation to be resolved, they would observe continences, that is refrain from sexual activity, if they wish to continue in communion with the Church and to receive the sacraments. If the situation cannot be resolved canonically (annulment etc.) then if they continue to live together, such as to raise their family, they would remain continent, “living as brother and sister” which is nobody’s business but their own and their priest in confession. If there are no children, they will probably be counselled to separate until the situation is resolved.
Should the situation be resolved and they are free to marry in the Church they would take the marriage vows, and live chastely and faithfully, that is reserving all sexual expression for the marriage bed and remaining completely open to new life. In that case, assuming they truly love each other, and hope someday to marry in the Church, they will remain celibate (unmarried). Bear in mind that the one who was married before is still considered married until and unless the marriage is proven to be invalid. By definition someone who is married cannot be celibate, but they must always be chaste (reserve sexual expression for its proper place) and continent (refrain from all sexual expression) if they are not married.
It is important to observe here that marital chastity may often require periods of continence for good reasons: the wife’s health or other concerns that preclude pregnancy, health or disability of either spouse that would make sexual activity unwise or impossible, separation (military duty, business trips etc.) or other situations.
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thistle
Guest
They have one child (now an adult). The couple are in their late 50’s so I don’t think living like brother and sister and refraining from all sexual activity would be a problem anyway. What you are saying then puzzleannie is that they go to confession, confess all mortal sins, and promise to Jesus in the Confessional that there will be no more sexual relationship. Assuming they are truly sorry and repentant then they would likely be absolved and then after penance could take communion.
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RichT
Guest
Isn’t the act of re-marriage itself the issue? I have heard of the church asking two to live as brother and sister while an annulment is on process, but the whole point is that an annulment is in process. To simply confess and then live as brother and sister without an annulment doesn’t solve the issue, does it?
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Mr.Lutz
Guest
I think I heard on ewtn some time time that there is no such a thing as “annulment” , but that there is a “decree of nullity” to recognise that a marriage had not been valid to begin with. Am I wrong? 
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mercygate
Guest
Mr. Lutz:
That is probably correct but the nuance is wasted on most people. It is true that an annulment doesn’t “cancel” a marriage. It merely finds that there never WAS a marriage.I think I heard on ewtn some time time that there is no such a thing as “annulment” , but that there is a “decree of nullity” to recognise that a marriage had not been valid to begin with. Am I wrong?
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Mr.Lutz
Guest
I am not familiar with the computer. Can anybody help me to get rid of the three guys sticking their thumb up each time I send a posting which does not need “celebration”?
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baltobetsy
Guest
Mr. Lutz:
Betsy
Click on the word “profile” in the upper right side of this page on an orange bar. Then look in the left column for “Edit Signature” and click there and you’ll be able to ditch the thumbs up guys. You can replace them with text or symbol of your choosing, or eliminate the signature altogether.
Betsy
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