Chores on Sunday

[RainDown]

I know that manual labor shouldn’t be done on a Sunday, but my mom (I’m a teen and still get bossed around ) keeps telling me to do my chores. I told her once that I’d prefer to do them on Monday to be mindful of the day of rest, and she got upset and insisted that I said that because I was being lazy (I wasn’t). I don’t know what to do when she says this. I know it sounds kind of silly, but which commandment do I follow? The 3rd of the 4th? I know a possible answer would be something like “Well why don’t you do what you’re supposed to earlier?” But sometimes its not possible because unfortunately she brings up what she thinks needs to be done on Sundays. And also, is working on a Sunday a mortal or venial sin (not because someone told you to in this case)?

 

[LilyM]

Depends - there ARE genuinely some chores that need to be done on Sundays. If the dishes need washing, cows need milking, the eggs collecting or the plants watering on that day, then it simply won’t wait another day.

And there are some that need doing on Sunday simply because there isn’t time to do them any other day. I’m guessing your mother feels that her chores fall into this category, which makes it fine to do them.

As far as work goes, you’re supposed to avoid UNnecessary work (which means you CAN do chores for either of the two reasons listed above, and also means you can do paid work if you need the money to pay essential bills, or if you work as a doctor or in the emergency services).

And you can certainly study - that’s not paid or manual work

A good rule of thumb that I once heard is that you probably shouldn’t spend more than four or five hours on a Sunday on paid or servile work - in other words it shouldn’t be a full working day indistinguishable from any other.

 

[RainDown]

Thanks, LilyM.

The stuff she tells me to do is something like this: “I want you to go through the living room and/or kitchen and pick all your stuff up.” I’m not a messy person, so it wouldn’t take long, but still, I’d rather do it Monday after school. I’m uncomfortable with working on Sundays. I’m wondering if the little things she tells me to do also would even be taken into consideration, like, it’s so small if it would hardly qualify as manual labor.

Oh, and another thing. I’ve always wondered if taking advantage of somebody doing unnecessary work on Sunday is sinful. For example, going out to eat. Being a waiter is not really necessary work (unless they really need the money I guess), yet people who don’t work on Sundays come in and the waiter serves them. I guess what I’m trying to say is, is using the services of another on a Sunday bad, because we are contributing to the work? Hm, my question sounded much better in my head.

 

[LilyM]

Thanks, LilyM.

The stuff she tells me to do is something like this: “I want you to go through the living room and/or kitchen and pick all your stuff up.” I’m not a messy person, so it wouldn’t take long, but still, I’d rather do it Monday after school. I’m uncomfortable with working on Sundays. I’m wondering if the little things she tells me to do also would even be taken into consideration, like, it’s so small if it would hardly qualify as manual labor.

Sorry, I have to agree with your mother on this one.

I think it’s reasonable for her to expect the public rooms of the house (including living room and kitchen) to be clean every day of the week - and if you’ve left your stuff in there then it’s also reasonable for her to expect you to shift it, even if it’s a Sunday.

That’s just one of those things that really should be every day.

 

[RainDown]

Sorry, I have to agree with your mother on this one.

I think it’s reasonable for her to expect the public rooms of the house (including living room and kitchen) to be clean every day of the week - and if you’ve left your stuff in there then it’s also reasonable for her to expect you to shift it, even if it’s a Sunday.

That’s just one of those things that really should be every day.

I guess…But it’s not like we have visitors or anything like that very often… Anyway, what would really qualify as “manual labor”? For some reason, every time I hear that term I think of a person pushing a plow.

 

[LilyM]

I guess…But it’s not like we have visitors or anything like that very often… Anyway, what would really qualify as “manual labor”? For some reason, every time I hear that term I think of a person pushing a plow.

:tsktsk: you don’t just clean house for visitors - you clean house because it’s better and healthier for you to live in a clean house and because it’s considerate to the others who live there.

Just about any heavy chore would count as manual labour - gardening, cleaning gutters, painting or fixing something around the house, big spring cleaning. As well as the sort of stuff tradesmen do - electrical work, plumbing, roofing, carpentry, fixing cars or machines …

 

[RobertLGarrett]

Thanks, LilyM.

The stuff she tells me to do is something like this: “I want you to go through the living room and/or kitchen and pick all your stuff up.” I’m not a messy person, so it wouldn’t take long, but still, I’d rather do it Monday after school. I’m uncomfortable with working on Sundays. I’m wondering if the little things she tells me to do also would even be taken into consideration, like, it’s so small if it would hardly qualify as manual labor.

Oh, and another thing. I’ve always wondered if taking advantage of somebody doing unnecessary work on Sunday is sinful. For example, going out to eat. Being a waiter is not really necessary work (unless they really need the money I guess), yet people who don’t work on Sundays come in and the waiter serves them. I guess what I’m trying to say is, is using the services of another on a Sunday bad, because we are contributing to the work? Hm, my question sounded much better in my head.

Hi RainDown,

How far to take the Sunday unnecessary work avoidance varies wildly. For your initial question, I can give you an easy answer. Get all your chores done on Saturday without your mother hounding you. This will accomplish two things - gratitude from your mother, rest on Sunday. I told the same to one of the teenagers at faith formation when she asked about getting her homework done Sunday night…do it on Friday or Saturday! As a husband, I try to help around the house as much as I can on Friday, so we can relax on the weekend.

As far as your restaurant question. The Church allows it, but it is good that you are thinking about that. I know some people who don’t go out to restaurants on Sunday. In fact, I can remember someone asking my pastor about filling up with gas on Sunday to make their drive to a family hike site. Our pastor said “fill up on Saturday.”

For a little cultural perspective, Orthodox Jews will walk to synagogue on Saturday, because they prohibit driving. I understand that some use no electricity on the Sabbath except the essentials…to the degree that some even loosen the lightbulb in their refrigerator. They prepare their meals in advance, as well.

We don’t have to go that far, of course. I think the important thing is to remember to keep the day holy. Encourage your family to do the same, but it wouldn’t hurt for you to take the lead as I mentioned in the first paragraph.

Pax,
Robert

 

[LilyM]

Hi RainDown,

How far to take the Sunday unnecessary work avoidance varies wildly. For your initial question, I can give you an easy answer. Get all your chores done on Saturday without your mother hounding you. This will accomplish two things - gratitude from your mother, rest on Sunday. I told the same to one of the teenagers at faith formation when she asked about getting her homework done Sunday night…do it on Friday or Saturday! As a husband, I try to help around the house as much as I can on Friday, so we can relax on the weekend.

As far as your restaurant question. The Church allows it, but it is good that you are thinking about that. I know some people who don’t go out to restaurants on Sunday. In fact, I can remember someone asking my pastor about filling up with gas on Sunday to make their drive to a family hike site. Our pastor said “fill up on Saturday.”

For a little cultural perspective, Orthodox Jews will walk to synagogue on Saturday, because they prohibit driving. I understand that some use no electricity on the Sabbath except the essentials…to the degree that some even loosen the lightbulb in their refrigerator. They prepare their meals in advance, as well.

We don’t have to go that far, of course. I think the important thing is to remember to keep the day holy. Encourage your family to do the same, but it wouldn’t hurt for you to take the lead as I mentioned in the first paragraph.

Pax,
Robert

In other words try to do in advance what you know your mother’s going to ask you to do anyway … I doubt she’s really going to ask you to do much differently this Sunday than she did last week, is she?

 

[RobertLGarrett]

In other words try to do in advance what you know your mother’s going to ask you to do anyway … I doubt she’s really going to ask you to do much differently this Sunday than she did last week, is she?

Exactly! All of us parents know well that we are asking for the same thing week after week. (I’m sure the teens know it too…)

 

[RainDown]

In other words try to do in advance what you know your mother’s going to ask you to do anyway … I doubt she’s really going to ask you to do much differently this Sunday than she did last week, is she?

Probably not! Guess I shoulda realized that.

 

[LilyM]

Probably not! Guess I shoulda realized that.

Hey, we’ve all been there - we were teenagers too once

 

[RobertLGarrett]

Hey, we’ve all been there - we were teenagers too once

Except, of course, I was perfect.

 

[mesurman]

Good topic. Advice Please.

I am a father to six and granddad to one (so far) self employed. My job brings great stress and long hours during the week. Puttering around the house on Sunday after Mass brings great stress relief , mental downtime and also getting those nagging little things accomplished. Is this okay?

 

[Seatuck]

Good topic. Advice Please.

I am a father to six and granddad to one (so far) self employed. My job brings great stress and long hours during the week. Puttering around the house on Sunday after Mass brings great stress relief , mental downtime and also getting those nagging little things accomplished. Is this okay?

Yes, as long as you are not prevented from keeping meeting your Sunday obligations for yourself or for your family. Just make sure your prayer life is what it should be and your focus is till on God on Sunday and you should be ok. You can check with your confessior on the details.

 

[puzzleannie]

I she brings up what she thinks needs to be done on Sundays. And also, is working on a Sunday a mortal or venial sin (not because someone told you to in this case)?

uneccesary manual labor is wrong on Sunday, but only approaches the degree of mortal sin if the intent is to deliberately deny the holiness of the day. Sorry, kid, obedience to one’s parent when giving a legitimate command trumps in this case. She is not asking to lay concrete or dig ditches, just the necessary tasks of daily living. Get up and do it. Do it cheerfully, without grumbling, without having to be asked, and you even gain grace and merit.

 

[RainDown]

uneccesary manual labor is wrong on Sunday, but only approaches the degree of mortal sin if the intent is to deliberately deny the holiness of the day. Sorry, kid, obedience to one’s parent when giving a legitimate command trumps in this case. She is not asking to lay concrete or dig ditches, just the necessary tasks of daily living. Get up and do it. Do it cheerfully, without grumbling, without having to be asked, and you even gain grace and merit.

You make me sound lazy. I was not being lazy. I really wanted to know for moral reasons.

 

[mesurman]

Yes, as long as you are not prevented from keeping meeting your Sunday obligations for yourself or for your family. Just make sure your prayer life is what it should be and your focus is till on God on Sunday and you should be ok. You can check with your confessior on the details.

I do take care of my family obligations. Mass Confession, Adoration, Holy Days, Prayer at home, the puttering around the house is truly therapeutic for me, I am also ADD and have a hard time staying still for too long, I need activity!!!

 

[puzzleannie]

You make me sound lazy. I was not being lazy. I really wanted to know for moral reasons.

I did not say you were lazy, I said nothing your mother is asking you to do is forbidden on Sunday. The purpose of Sunday rest, among other things, is devoted to spiritual growth, renewal and reflection. That end is not served by bickering with one’s parents.

 

[RainDown]

I did not say you were lazy, I said nothing your mother is asking you to do is forbidden on Sunday. The purpose of Sunday rest, among other things, is devoted to spiritual growth, renewal and reflection. That end is not served by bickering with one’s parents.

Sorry, I was a little crabby. And I do not bicker with her. Bickering accomplishes nothing. Besides, the reason I was asking in the first place was because I wanted to know if small would work would be acceptable on a day reserved for rest and reflections, not because I was trying to get out of other obligations.

 

[Lainey63]

Thanks, LilyM.

The stuff she tells me to do is something like this: “I want you to go through the living room and/or kitchen and pick all your stuff up.” I’m not a messy person, so it wouldn’t take long, but still, I’d rather do it Monday after school. I’m uncomfortable with working on Sundays. I’m wondering if the little things she tells me to do also would even be taken into consideration, like, it’s so small if it would hardly qualify as manual labor.

Oh, and another thing. I’ve always wondered if taking advantage of somebody doing unnecessary work on Sunday is sinful. For example, going out to eat. Being a waiter is not really necessary work (unless they really need the money I guess), yet people who don’t work on Sundays come in and the waiter serves them. I guess what I’m trying to say is, is using the services of another on a Sunday bad, because we are contributing to the work? Hm, my question sounded much better in my head.

:hey_bud: Maybe if you put your stuff away where they belong in the first place…you wouldnt have to listen to your mom tell you…to put your stuff away…