Christmas presents

[mommyjo2]

I have a question about Christmas presents…
There will not be a lot of presents under the tree this year. I have 6 kids, ages 7,6,4,3,21 months and newborn.
We will be able to purchase gifts in a couple of weeks, when I go back to work.
My family is very generous with my children and will be giving gifts to them on Dec. 26, when we get together.
I have a few little things, plastic animals, and Star Wars watches from Burger King, etc., all which would fit in a stocking. Also candy.
Would it be too confusing for the children if we did ‘stockings only’ on Christmas morning, then went to Grandma’s the next day and opened presents?
I am planning to celebrate the Epiphany (Jan. 6) which European countries also call 3 Kings Day (celebrating when the Magi brought gifts to Baby Jesus) and give some toys to the kids then.
Should I keep Christmas as a “Holy Day”, with no toys etc. and celebrate Epiphany only, so they are not all confused/disappointed?
We don’t do Santa so I’m not worried about that.
Am I making too big a deal of this?
I know it is spiritually good to do without. How do I convince my children that it’s ok to not have presents, esp. with the commercial culture? They’ve been talking about Christmas presents for months now.
In the past we have always done the traditional stockings and presents under the tree Christmas morning.
Any thoughts?

 

[mumto5]

mommyjo2:

I have a question about Christmas presents…
There will not be a lot of presents under the tree this year. I have 6 kids, ages 7,6,4,3,21 months and newborn.
We will be able to purchase gifts in a couple of weeks, when I go back to work.
My family is very generous with my children and will be giving gifts to them on Dec. 26, when we get together.
I have a few little things, plastic animals, and Star Wars watches from Burger King, etc., all which would fit in a stocking. Also candy.
Would it be too confusing for the children if we did ‘stockings only’ on Christmas morning, then went to Grandma’s the next day and opened presents?
I am planning to celebrate the Epiphany (Jan. 6) which European countries also call 3 Kings Day (celebrating when the Magi brought gifts to Baby Jesus) and give some toys to the kids then.
Should I keep Christmas as a “Holy Day”, with no toys etc. and celebrate Epiphany only, so they are not all confused/disappointed?
We don’t do Santa so I’m not worried about that.
Am I making too big a deal of this?
I know it is spiritually good to do without. How do I convince my children that it’s ok to not have presents, esp. with the commercial culture? They’ve been talking about Christmas presents for months now.
In the past we have always done the traditional stockings and presents under the tree Christmas morning.
Any thoughts?

I don’t think waiting for a day will be a problem. Those that are old enough to distinguish the two days will be old enough to understand you are waiting until the next day. Those that aren’t old enough won’t know any better. It’s also a good lesson to the children about what Christmas is all about. In the future, their memories won’t be what they got for Christmas, it will be the togetherness and family interactions. Try to relax about it. I know it’s hard with the pressure to give and give big and shop and spend… Your children will have a magical Christmas without loads of presents. One year we drove to all the different parishes in our city to look at their nativity sets. The children really loved it.

 

[Viki59]

I don’t think it would be confusing to have stockings on Christmas and then presents at Grandma’s, and then mention that they might get another present on Epiphany. If they had not been talking about their anticipation for months now, you might get away with waiting until your visit to Grandma, but Christmas morning is special and the older ones will know what day it is.
If it were me, I would discuss with them that finances are hard this year and they will not be getting a lot on Christmas morning, but that our best gift of course is Jesus’ birth.

We’re going to celebrate Epiphany for the first time this year, it sounds like fun. We’ll have a cake and a present for each in memory of the Three Kings’ gifts. The old custom is to have a little king or a bean in the cake, and whoever gets the bean in his piece of cake is King for the day, with a gilt crown. I’m worried about somebody breaking a tooth on the bean, though! I think we’ll just have the cake.

 

[puzzleannie]

I think it is a great idea to start your own tradition, have Christmas morning be “stocking” day, and have “Santa” visit grandma’s house and leave everyone’s presents there. When I was a kid it was still stockings, plus possibly one big present (sled, doll, bike etc.) and one or two “family presents” - board game, jigsaw puzzle etc.

no law that says you can’t quietly bypass the whole Santa thing and let them know we are going to grandma’s house because we love being together as a family, with a lecture on how to express appropriate surprise and gratitude for any presents there may be, and to write thank-you notes for them.

You could also use Christmas day as a time of doing for or giving to others, or use Epiphany or St. Nick day Dec. 6 as a day for exchanging small meaningful homemade gifts or doing acts of charity. You are free to make your own traditions. We bought out of a lot of the insanity early on. I told the kids when they were old enough “if I see it advertised on TV, you will not be getting it, so don’t ask”. If another relative got it for them, so be it, but I disliked being manipulated. We have also chosen not to participate in the Grandma Wars, where all the grandparents compete to see who can give the biggest, most expensive presents at every available opportunity. No need to try and trump the scooters, trampoline, Disney vacations given by “other grandma”.

 

[mommyjo2]

Viki59:

.
I’m worried about somebody breaking a tooth on the bean, though! I think we’ll just have the cake.

Why don’t you use a jelly bean?
I don’t think it would melt.

 

[Agricola]

Growing up it took almost the entire octave of Christmas to open our presents… not because they were plentiful, but because my mother made sure that the presents were not put before the celebration of Christ’s birth. We did have our stockings after Mass on Christmas Day, but since we normally didn’t have any candy in the house, we usually saved them for quite some time too.

I think to wait until Christ receives His gifts from the Wise Men to open presents is a great tradition to start in the home. It would help keep Him as the focus. You could even have the children help the infant Jesus “open” His gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh, by having them place the Wise Men figures in the creche in front of the manger.

Hmm… I do like that idea… I’ll have to keep that in mind for my own family.

I hope you and your family have a wonderful Christmas.

God bless,

Agricola