Complaint about RCIA

  • Thread starter Thread starter Suzzana
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
S

Suzzana

Guest
I just was reading the post about the guy who missed the ceremony today. Out of the 15 candidates from my parish only three of us showed up today. About 10 of these candidates from my parish were allowed to join RCIA in January and they do not regularly attend our class. I was told that I MUST start the classes in August, attend them regularly and that this meeting with the Bishop was VERY important. I don’t get why there are “rules” if they are not enforced. I don’t think it’s fair to let people join when classes are almost over and I think not showing up to classes or ceremonys shows a complete lack of commitment unless the person was extremely ill there is no excuse. Rant over!

🤷
 
In charity, perhaps you might read the parable of the vineyard workers found in Matthew 20. The journey of faith takes on many roads. Yours will hopefully be rich because of your experiences in the RCIA your involved in. The actions of others won’t affect your journey unless you allow it too.
 
I just was reading the post about the guy who missed the ceremony today. Out of the 15 candidates from my parish only three of us showed up today. About 10 of these candidates from my parish were allowed to join RCIA in January and they do not regularly attend our class. I was told that I MUST start the classes in August, attend them regularly and that this meeting with the Bishop was VERY important. I don’t get why there are “rules” if they are not enforced. I don’t think it’s fair to let people join when classes are almost over and I think not showing up to classes or ceremonys shows a complete lack of commitment unless the person was extremely ill there is no excuse. Rant over! 🤷
I don’t know about “fair or not fair”, but it is really kind of heartbreaking to think that some people are not willing to put out effort for something that is such an honor and privilege and blessing to them! Of course, there are sometimes extenuating circumstances which cannot be helped, but in cases in which it is just a lack of effort–lack of appreciation for something so wonderful–that is very sad–to say the least. Insofar as parables go, I think since so many of the candidates didn’t show up, the odds are that more than a few of them are more like the guests invited to the wedding of the king, and they just made up excuses not to come!😦
 
In charity, perhaps you might read the parable of the vineyard workers found in Matthew 20. The journey of faith takes on many roads. Yours will hopefully be rich because of your experiences in the RCIA your involved in. The actions of others won’t affect your journey unless you allow it too.
👍
 
I would agree with Suzzana. This program seems a “bit off.” I would complete the program and probably move to another parish. It sounds like this parish has no leadership and does not care to improve either. Face it, RCIA and initiation sacraments are huge in the church. If you are in a parish that does not take the faith seriously, let it serve as a big red flag. Your faith is important. If you grow, you will be more able to help others get on the path to heaven. This is what it is all about - saving souls.

You deserve a nurturing and intellectually challenging/stimulating environment to do your best, multiply your “talents”, and die to self and yield 30, 60, or 100-fold.
 
Well of course it’s the way it is. There are few universal standards, the program is practically at the whim of the parish, or, in some dioceses, at the whim of the diocese. Many people have RCIA horror stories, and IMO, one of the biggest reasons is that its regulation is very low. Some programs are absolutely fantastic, and some are not.
 
I do not know if this applies, but I once sponsored a woman who was raised in the church and had been properly instructed but had not been confirmed. She was only required to attend her final instructions starting 8 weeks before Easter. She and many others were confirmed in this fashion by the Bishop himself. Is it possible these people fall into this category? Even if true, missing a meeting with the Bishop is not a good show of faith.
 
I don’t think it’s fair to let people join when classes are almost over and I think not showing up to classes or ceremonys shows a complete lack of commitment unless the person was extremely ill there is no excuse. Rant over!
🤷
Suzzana,

Others didn’t go to all the classes and you did? Then you are the lucky one, provided you have good instructors. RCIA classes are not penance or necessary evils, but rather wonderful opportunities to learn your new faith. If one of my classmates misses a class, I don’t envy her - I feel sorry for her.

You get out of it what you put into it. You are putting a lot into it - congratulations!

God bless,

RonF
 
I just was reading the post about the guy who missed the ceremony today. Out of the 15 candidates from my parish only three of us showed up today. About 10 of these candidates from my parish were allowed to join RCIA in January and they do not regularly attend our class. I was told that I MUST start the classes in August, attend them regularly and that this meeting with the Bishop was VERY important. I don’t get why there are “rules” if they are not enforced. I don’t think it’s fair to let people join when classes are almost over and I think not showing up to classes or ceremonys shows a complete lack of commitment unless the person was extremely ill there is no excuse. Rant over!

🤷
Focus on yourself and your own spiritual journey towards the True Church. Let the RCIA instructors and the pastor to worry about everyone else.

Wecome Home 🙂

Luna
 
I would agree with Suzzana. This program seems a “bit off.” I would complete the program and probably move to another parish. It sounds like this parish has no leadership and does not care to improve either. Face it, RCIA and initiation sacraments are huge in the church. If you are in a parish that does not take the faith seriously, let it serve as a big red flag. Your faith is important. If you grow, you will be more able to help others get on the path to heaven. This is what it is all about - saving souls.

You deserve a nurturing and intellectually challenging/stimulating environment to do your best, multiply your “talents”, and die to self and yield 30, 60, or 100-fold.
Excuse me, but with all due respect, we deserve nothing. Nowhere does God tell us that we have a right to an intellectually challenging/stimulating evnironment. That’s not in the Bible that I read, nor have I ever come across that in the writings of any saint or the Catechism or any encyclical, nor have I heard this in any explanation of why the Church exists.

Quite the opposite I feel is true - God tells us that we will be expected to put ourselves last, to work hard, and to expect to recieve no thanks for it. My experience is to expect to be told that we are incompitent and inadequate by those who demand their own rights yet don’t lift a hand to help.

Posts which council people to leave their parish every time the toilet overflows or the priest gives a bad homily fascinate me. In this case, the OP probably isn’t even baptized yet!

-Tim-
 
I do not know if this applies, but I once sponsored a woman who was raised in the church and had been properly instructed but had not been confirmed. She was only required to attend her final instructions starting 8 weeks before Easter. She and many others were confirmed in this fashion by the Bishop himself. Is it possible these people fall into this category? Even if true, missing a meeting with the Bishop is not a good show of faith.
This is occurring in my parish as well,people starting in Jan.This seems like reasonable explanation,that if they need only be confirmed,not as much instruction is required. Meaning not coming in from another faith to be confirmed,but already Catholic:)
 
I only need to be confirmed but I was told I must start in August and I know for a fact that I am the only one in my group to be baptized as a Catholic. I have also had my first Communion. I know I need to just worry about myself but I can’t help but feel this is not fair. I’m glad I attended all of the classes but I don’t think this is right.
 
I only need to be confirmed but I was told I must start in August and I know for a fact that I am the only one in my group to be baptized as a Catholic. I have also had my first Communion. I know I need to just worry about myself but I can’t help but feel this is not fair. I’m glad I attended all of the classes but I don’t think this is right.
Yes, it sucks when you do the right thing,
only to have others slide by and get the same “reward”.
I know how easy it is to cry “it’s not fair” and “it’s not right”,
and I understand completely the feelings that are going on here.

That said, I want to share something that my spiritual director said to me, when I was lamenting the (my perceived) “unfairness” of a situation.
I am paraphrasing a little, because his comment had to do with my specific situation, but I’m sure you’ll get the idea. 😉
So your angry. You feel you have been treated unfairly and unjustly,
but you have some culpability in your situation.
You made choices, now you have to deal with the consequences.
What is “unfair” about that?
You want to talk about “unfair” look at that crucifix on the wall.
That was “unfair”!!
A man who did no wrong, died because you (and I) did.
That is what is unfair & unjust, yet the punishment was accepted in love & obedience.
If this is your cross to bear, accept it, just as Jesus did.
 
I only need to be confirmed but I was told I must start in August and I know for a fact that I am the only one in my group to be baptized as a Catholic. I have also had my first Communion. I know I need to just worry about myself but I can’t help but feel this is not fair. I’m glad I attended all of the classes but I don’t think this is right.
What’s fair is allowing people to progress at their own pace. A baptized, catechized Anglican coming into full communion may need a lot less instruction than a non-catechized baptized Catholic. It may sound unfair but as long as each is getting what he/she needs I don’t see a problem.

I do have a problem with starting the real RCIA in Sept. or Oct. and baptizing in March or April. It should be a year round, minimum year-long process.
 
I just was reading the post about the guy who missed the ceremony today. Out of the 15 candidates from my parish only three of us showed up today. About 10 of these candidates from my parish were allowed to join RCIA in January and they do not regularly attend our class. I was told that I MUST start the classes in August, attend them regularly and that this meeting with the Bishop was VERY important. I don’t get why there are “rules” if they are not enforced. I don’t think it’s fair to let people join when classes are almost over and I think not showing up to classes or ceremonys shows a complete lack of commitment unless the person was extremely ill there is no excuse. Rant over!

🤷
You only need to be confirmed and you were required to attend the Rite of Election today?

That is odd, even for RCIA.

Like others have advised. Just focus on you and your journey and what you need to do. Dont worry about the others.

It sounds like you are part of a very weak and not well run RCIA program and the instructions and those in charge of it may not really know what they are doing either. (it’s a sad but true fact that they exist.)

Know you have been faithful and willing in your efforts. God knows this too. Focus on Him, and not the others. Others can be such a distraction for our own relationship with Him.

God Bless! 👍
 
I only need to be confirmed but I was told I must start in August and I know for a fact that I am the only one in my group to be baptized as a Catholic. I have also had my first Communion. I know I need to just worry about myself but I can’t help but feel this is not fair. I’m glad I attended all of the classes but I don’t think this is right.
I had private instruction by a very holy priest who is now 91 years old twenty years ago I had no such meeting with any Bishop and I am just as Catholic as anyone else whether they be convert or cradle Catholics You do not know their situation such as a terminal illness in the family or any other problems that they may be having please just ficus on your own journey I am really glad that I did makes it much easier.
 
I just was reading the post about the guy who missed the ceremony today. Out of the 15 candidates from my parish only three of us showed up today. About 10 of these candidates from my parish were allowed to join RCIA in January and they do not regularly attend our class. I was told that I MUST start the classes in August, attend them regularly and that this meeting with the Bishop was VERY important. I don’t get why there are “rules” if they are not enforced. I don’t think it’s fair to let people join when classes are almost over and I think not showing up to classes or ceremonys shows a complete lack of commitment unless the person was extremely ill there is no excuse. Rant over!
Are you sure that every candidate is there for the same thing? Perhaps there are different steps depending upon how many sacraments of initiation one needs to receive.
 
I just was reading the post about the guy who missed the ceremony today. Out of the 15 candidates from my parish only three of us showed up today. About 10 of these candidates from my parish were allowed to join RCIA in January and they do not regularly attend our class. I was told that I MUST start the classes in August, attend them regularly and that this meeting with the Bishop was VERY important. I don’t get why there are “rules” if they are not enforced. I don’t think it’s fair to let people join when classes are almost over and I think not showing up to classes or ceremonys shows a complete lack of commitment unless the person was extremely ill there is no excuse. Rant over!

🤷
My guess is that not everyone is there for the same reasons.

For example, there’s a difference between someone who is baptized and someone who is not.

A catechumen (unbaptized) should spend at least a year in the catechumenate. A candidate (baptized) needs to spend only as much time as necessary in preparation. Depending on whether the candidate grew up in a religious home/church or not, the needed preparation may be very short or may be much longer.

When you say that three of the 15 candidates in your parish came today – the Call to Continuing Conversion is an optional rite. (This is the rite that baptized candidates go through.) Perhaps it would be nice if more took part in it, but if they choose not to participate it’s their choice to make.

In my archdiocese the Call to Continuing Conversion is celebrated in individual parishes rather than centrally. It helps maintain the distinction between those who are already baptized and those who are not.
 
As RCIA co-ordinator in my parish I have several times had some people complain to me that so and so only started coming X weeks ago and I have been coming from the beginning. In most cases there are good reasons that I know and the Parish Priest knows and that nobody else needs to know. It also may be they will not go ahead to the Sacraments this Easter and again, for reasons that are not the concern of anybody else. What may seem unfair to you may be done for good pastoral reasons. Make the most of your experience, be grateful that you do not have the same hurdles to cross. In any event, in my parish, if people do not have a satisfactory attendance without good reason then their entry into the church will be delayed.
 
Everyone’s situation is different. Some people might be in a RCIA class because they’re coming back to the Church after many years away. They might have been confirmed as teenagers, but if, say, they’re in their fifties and have been gone for thirty years, well, you could see that expecting them to be back in church hitting the ground running would be about the same as expecting them to do a trigonometry problem if they haven’t seen trig since high school! Other people may be doing RCIA as a sort of correspondence course because of work schedules, etc. They might be doing tougher assignments than you are.

And the RCIA coordinator is right. If individual candidates’ learning needs are being assessed and a pastoral response to each is formulated, that fact is no other candidate’s business.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top