Confessing forgotten sins from a long time ago

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OneSmallFlower

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So for about the last two years I’ve been living an actively Catholic life. I love my faith and am actually discerning a call to the religious life. But I’ve got this problem.
You probably noticed I said “For the last two years.” Well, prior to that, I lived a pretty “fake” Christian life- pretending to be a good person while doing bad stuff in secret. When I realized I was an absolute hypocrite living in a perpetual state of mortal sin, I made a confession- well, actually, I made several confessions: I lied on a bunch and then finally got up the nerve to make a real one. At that real one, I really did confess everything I could remember, no matter how bad. I felt much peace after that and have been trying to live a decent Christian life ever since.

Now here’s the problem: I did truly confess everything I could remember, and the priest, knowing I suffer from scrupulosity, told me very emphatically, “ALL your sins are forgiven; go in peace” (after the absolution, of course). But there were things that, in the moment, I did NOT remember, and some of those things were still pretty bad. Every time I try to grow a little more holy, the Devil seems to pull one of those things out and remind me of them. Recently I decided I’d like to start attending daily Mass. Well, wouldn’t you know it, but one of those sins randomly jumped to the forefront of my mind for the first time in years. I try to go to confession every week, before Sunday Mass, and while I’m currently not in a state of mortal sin, I know that you’re supposed to mention any mortal sins you’ve forgotten to mention at past confessions.

This sin was a really more of an intention to sin; I was seriously tempted and began to intend to sin, but in the end decided against it. Nevertheless, even that intention would be something incredibly uncomfortable to admit to in confession. So my question is, do I need to mention this next time I go to confession on Saturday? Do I need to mention the multiple confessions at which I lied, as well? (Now that I’m aware that’s a mortal sin). Am I just being scrupulous? Most importantly, how do I get the Devil off my back with stuff like this? I’m not kidding; it happens consistently, every time I try to grow in virtue. It’s really difficult, because it’s just uncomfortable mentioning sins you’ve forgotten as it is sin’s you’ve just committed. Do you guys have any advice?
 
If a person has forgotten a mortal sin…he is obliged to confess it…though if they are scrupulous…please note that their confessor may need to tell them to leave it …for it could make them worse in their scrupulosity etc The confessor needs to judge. He might say “only confess if one is* certain* it was mortal and* certain* it was not confessed as it is to be”. Or he may need to say your in the circumstance of an exception and your do to this or that…

It is important for a scrupulous person or a person with a tendency to scruples…have a regular confessor who will know him and direct him…this is key! He can then ask the confessor to take responsibility for a while for him…

As to your confessions and past mortals sins or question of lying - bring the matter to your regular confessor who knows you and your scruples (since you note that is problem).
 
Alright, thank you. Sighs Pray for me, brother…
Although I have to ask, for future reference, is a sin of intention a sin even if one in the end chooses not act on that intention? Is it a mortal sin?
 
Although I have to ask, for future reference, is a sin of intention a sin even if one in the end chooses not act on that intention? Is it a mortal sin?
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While I don’t know whether the sin of intention without acting upon the intention is mortal, I think it is a sin. I truly believe you should be asking a priest about whether the sin is mortal, not some people on the internet who have not spent 7 years in seminary studying such things.

We can see this in Matthew 6.27-28:

“You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY’; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

Having the intent in the heart, even if one would never act it out in reality (perhaps for fear of being caught), is considered a sin.
 
Good point with Matthew 5:28. I’ll ask the confessor’s advice on this one, then… not fun, but then, I guess confession’s not supposed to be, right?
God bless, brother. And say a pray for me tonight? It would mean the world. :o
 
I sometimes think of things I did long ago and I feel this churning icky rock in my belly because I can’t remember if I’ve confessed them. Then that leads into a snowball feeling of worry–what if all of my confessions have been invalid? What if I’ve been kidding myself? What if, what if, what if? But I have to just take a deep breath, remind myself that God is merciful–not calculating–and that He is not trying to catch me in some trap. I find peace when I remember that. 🙂 Take the advice of others and simply ask your confessor about it. You are in my prayers!
 
OneSmallFlower said:
Alright, thank you. Sighs Pray for me, brother…
Although I have to ask, for future reference, is a sin of intention a sin even if one in the end chooses not act on that intention? Is it a mortal sin?
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If I intend to rob a bank - and later do not do it - but had full knowledge and deliberate consent – that would be a mortal sin. (one needs grave matter, full knowledge and deliberate consent to commit a mortal sin).

If one is tempted though-- and does not consent - that is a different matter. Sometimes temptation can be quite tempting…there can be hesitation…can be partial consent (not full consent for mortal sin) or it can be just quite tempting in spite of one not wanting it to happen…

Often those with scruples can confuse temptation with consent or partial consent with complete.

Discuss with your confessor.
 
On two distinct occasions and times, and in two different geographic regions of the U.S., I was told the following by two different Catholic priests in confession:

First, in the Midwest many years ago, “quit dwelling on the past, it’s the devil playing mind games with you and you are absolved of all past sins.”

Second, in the recent past in the Southwest, “quit beating yourself up about what has occurred in the past, you are absolved of all past sins.”

I was not priest shopping for these answers. As stated in several of the above posts, you need to discuss with your confessor.

God Bless and Peace to all.
 
FreeEver said:
On two distinct occasions and times, and in two different geographic regions of the U.S., I was told the following by two different Catholic priests in confession:

First, in the Midwest many years ago, “quit dwelling on the past, it’s the devil playing mind games with you and you are absolved of all past sins.”

Second, in the recent past in the Southwest, “quit beating yourself up about what has occurred in the past, you are absolved of all past sins.”

I was not priest shopping for these answers. As stated in several of the above posts, you need to discuss with your confessor.

God Bless and Peace to all.
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Normally one is obliged to confess a forgotten mortal sin. (readers see my above posts)

But such is not about revisiting re-confessing already confessed and absolved mortal sins - one ought not “dwell” on the past that was already confessed and absolved.
 
Hi One Small Flower,

You remind me very much of myself. I have come back to the church last year and am still dealing with the problem of past sins. I have been told at this stage by several priests to leave the past behind me. I want to go back to the last priest I was with to confirm this as I felt that he was quite traditional but still told me to move on. It’s very difficult.

I am interested in what you said about scruples actually being temptations. I feel that I am growing in the faith, but that each time I seem to make any progress I get this uneasy feeling and the scruples come back to me. I have started praying about it and I feel that I am getting some peace. I have also started to pray for others on this forum who suffer from scrupolosity as it is very difficult to deal with.
 
This prayer helps me, hopefully it will help you too.

Trust in God’s Mercy

Gracious Father,
I thank you for the mercy you have shown in forgiving my sins and for the peace that comes from being reconciled with you and with your Church.

O God, you are faithful, and you never abandon those who hope in you. I know that my redemption from sin and death has been purchased at the cost of your Son’s blood. In return for this priceless gift, I resolve today to renew my trust in your unfailing mercy.

In times of doubt, when painful memories of past sins threaten to destroy the peace you have given, let the power of your Holy Spirit cast out all self-condemnation and give me greater confidence in your word of pardon.

Teach me to encourage others so they, too, may seek your tender compassion and come to know your peace, which nothing can take away.

I pray this in the name of Jesus, your Son, in whom you have restored me to life. Amen.
 
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