I am usually working Saturday afternoon so I can’t go to confession at the scheduled times. I often go on Friday morning before the Daily Mass. However, the parish I go to on Friday morning doesn’t have a regular priest until they just merged with my parish (now I have no idea what’s going to happen when I go today.) Before they merged (I don’t know what’s going to happen now) there were several different priests. A couple of them could hear confessions before Mass, whereas another was too busy before and after Mass.
Here’s my question however: sometimes I just don’t want to attend daily Mass. I especially don’t want to attend if I am unable to receive confession before the Mass as I can’t receive the Eucharist and it feels pointless. However, I don’t want the other parishioners to judge me for leaving so I stay (I am acquaintances with a ton of people in this town as I work in the store and always talk to everyone.) Sometimes I just want to receive confession and go because I’m just not feeling up to staying for Mass.
What should I do? Yes, I know daily Mass is good and all, but sometimes I just don’t want to attend. I don’t know why I get these feelings, I suppose they all stem from my computer addiction.
I will start by saying the Mass is never pointless.
That doesn’t mean you should feel obligated to stay when you confess before a Mass during the week, however. It is perfectly acceptable to confess before Mass and not remain to participate in the liturgy.
I am also a recognizable figure in the community. That changes nothing for me. As long as I am behaving correctly, I am not responsible for every thought that crosses a person’s mind. Confessing before Mass on Friday without participating in the Mass scheduled after Confession is a valid option.
Our parish offers confession times M-F before the 8:00 am mass. It is my favorite time to go to confession, as the line is usually shorter and moves faster than on Saturday afternoon.
I know virtually EVERYONE who attends the 8:00 am mass as I’m an organist, involved in several ministries, and have a son at the parish school. No one bats an eye that I don’t stay for mass, and no one seems to be scandalized to see me in line back there as often as I am.
Don’t worry about what others think or imagine about your choices.
And if you do stay for mass, offer up your discomfort for those who have to wait weeks or months to attend mass because of location, etc.
God bless you, dear one. And keep fighting the good fight!
God knows your heart. Don’t worry about what the people think. I doubt you commit sooooo many mortal sins you cannot go to communion without confession! But I’m one of the people you shouldn’t worry about !
Here’s my question however: sometimes I just don’t want to attend daily Mass. I especially don’t want to attend if I am unable to receive confession before the Mass as I can’t receive the Eucharist and it feels pointless.
If you are there for Confession…confess & leave with no worries. If one particular day, you are able to stay for the Mass then do so…without any obligation to anyone but God. Remember, the only days we are obligated to attend Mass are Sunday & Holy days.
You’re not required to attend Mass on non-obligatory days, so if you don’t want to attend Mass that day there is nothing wrong with it.
Your question wasn’t “Why attend Mass if I can’t receive communion?” But the above quotation stood out to me because it betrays a common but (in my opinion) problematic view of the Mass.
The primary end of Mass is not receiving Holy Communion. In fact, for many centuries it was uncommon for a layperson to receive Holy Communion even weekly. There are Four Ends of Mass (none of which are specifically receiving Holy Communion):
Adoration/Worship - At Mass, we are truly at the foot of Golgotha, in the physical and spiritual presence of God, and we get to participate in the Passion, Death, and Resurrection of our Blessed Lord. It is at Mass that we best offer our worship to God.
Thanksgiving - All that we have (especially including the grace of sacramental absolution in Confession) comes from God’s hand. You are in no way required to go to daily Mass, so you have no reason to feel guilty if you don’t, but there’s no better way to give thanks to God than to participate in Mass (which often only takes 30ish minutes on a weekday).
Atonement - If the best way we can receive forgiveness for our sins in Confession, then the perhaps the best way to do penance for those sins is to participate prayerfully at Mass.
Petition - Even after several years of frequently attending daily Mass, a video of Fulton Sheen explaining Mass changed the way I pray at Mass. He explains the drama of Mass as such (although much more eloquently): at the offertory, when the priest offers the gifts of bread and wine to God, we should be offering ourselves and our prayers and needs and every aspect of our lives. At the consecration we die with Christ. At Holy Communion we rise with Him (and even if we can’t receive, we can still make a spiritual communion). In this way we best offer our lives and prayers to God so that He can transform and accomplish them as He wills, just as he transforms the bread and wine into Christ. If you have prayers and needs for yourself and others, rosaries and novenas and personal prayers are all great and important, but at Mass we can hand these things directly to Christ on the Cross.
None of this is intended to guilt you into attending Mass when you aren’t required - I have plenty of days when I don’t want to attend and don’t. But no single Mass is ever pointless as long as you show up and offer that time there in union with the priest in adoration, thanksgiving, atonement, and/or petition. There is boundless grace at every Mass even when you can’t receive Communion.
In fact, frequent Mass has really helped me combat many of the sins I take so frequently to the confessional. When I’m in the habit of attending daily Mass, it becomes the focal point of my day, with every other moment feeding into it or from it.
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