Confused on my vocation

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Sonya85

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I love my husband and 3 children very much and recently I have sought the Lord our God to guide me to Him and His Kingdom. I have found that there are so many prayers and feast days that I feel so obligated to fulfill. I feel like I don’t have the time or moment of peace to pray and build that relationship with My God. My domestic life I feel gets in the way if LOVING MY GOD TO THE FULLEST. I dont know how to Love God with all my might being that I’m married and have children, plus currently pregnant. I’ve been reading St. Faustina’s Diary and this has me so inspired to give my life to God. I just dont know how to calm the feeling of Gods jealousy. I Dont want to anger Him. PLEASE HELP
 
Sonya85 said:
I have found that there are so many prayers and feast days that I feel so obligated to fulfill.
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Perhaps you have a spiritual issue that needs direction from your priest.

If you think there are “so many prayers and feast days” you feel obligated to fulfill, something is wrong. Because Sunday plus five holy days (in the US), some of which are transferred to Sunday this year (Assumption, All Saints) doesn’t seem like “too much” as far as feast days go. And while we need to pray there aren’t specific obligatory prayers that would put you under such stress.

Can you share what all these feast days and prayers you feel obligated to are?
Sonya85 said:
My domestic life I feel gets in the way if LOVING MY GOD TO THE FULLEST.
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In our vocation to marriage, our domestic life is our way of loving and serving.
Sonya85 said:
I’ve been reading St. Faustina’s Diary and this has me so inspired to give my life to God.
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St Faustina had a vocation to religious life. You have a vocation to marriage and children. They are different vocations. Those in marriage give our lives to God differently than those in a religious vocation.
Sonya85 said:
I just dont know how to calm the feeling of Gods jealousy. I Dont want to anger Him. PLEASE HELP
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Sounds like you need help from your priest.
 
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Pray the rosary every day! I’m still discerning but I know praying the rosary every day has deepened my relationship with God. I think a lot of times we want a cookie cutter vocation but we don’t realize that everyone’s vocation is different in many ways even among people of similar lifestyles.

Also reading the bible, but other religious books and deepening the knowledge of the faith helps a lot. Currently reading Mystical City of God by Mary of Agreda…really awesome book(s).
 
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Are your husband and children Catholic? Do you pray with them? Attend Mass with them? Do parish activities with them?

There is so much that can be done in your Domestic Church to unite with your family in faith. If this is lacking, then please see a priest or deacon to guide you. You are right to be seeking God, and it is right to build your life around the cornerstone of faith, but you shouldn’t be fearful of God’s wrath in all this.
 
You love God by loving your husband and children. God gave you the vocation of being a loving wife and mother. He gave St. Faustina a different vocation.

instead of feeling obligated to “fulfill” certain “prayers and feast days”, just pick a couple of simple ways to pray that you can do in your breaks from being a busy mom. Also, maybe you can do some family activities, like cooking or baking special meals, to celebrate a few feast days. Finally, if possible to pray daily with your family, even if it’s just Grace before Meals and a short night prayer, do that…maybe a family Rosary once a week.
 
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Right now, your first responsibility, in God’s plan, is to care for your family. The fact that He has allowed you to marry, and conceive children, is enough proof. I don’t know how old your older Kids are, but, if you haven’t already done so, it will soon be time to tell them about your faith, take them to mass, help them prepare for their sacraments…there’s a lot to do, right there. Pray for your kids, yourself, your husband. Church isn’t just on Sundays…it’s being a consistent teacher and role model for your children.

Take care. God Bless!
 
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I would recommend reading up on other saints as well - particularly the Little Way of St Therese and the lives of saints from the domestic realm (like St Margaret of Scotland and St Zelie Martin). We are all called to sainthood but we are not all called to get there in the same way.

Also, most feast days carry no obligation for how they should be celebrated and those that do generally only require Mass attendance. You don’t have to follow every tradition from every culture related to various feast days and practices. No one can as there are too many in our universal Church. Find those that speak to you and your family and stick to those. Don’t feel pressured into doing the rest just because other Catholics or families may be doing them.
 
Sonya85 said:
My domestic life I feel gets in the way if LOVING MY GOD TO THE FULLEST.
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I would imagine that this feeling either comes from, or is encouraged by the Devil. When it comes to discerning spirits one thing many priests say is that the Holy Spirit never disturbs but brings peace.
Sonya85 said:
I’ve been reading St. Faustina’s Diary and this has me so inspired to give my life to God.
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You are giving your life to God, through your marriage and your family duties. It doesn’t matter if you feel that that is not the case. You can offer that feeling to God.

Opus Dei and the spirituality of St. Josemaria Escriva is great for showing how we can give glory to God in the everyday things of life. Not saying go off and join Opus Dei, but perhaps try reading a bit of his book, The Way, which gives short points to meditate on in different areas of spiritual life.
 
I can’t seem to believe that that’s all there is. There has to be more to it.
 
That’s what your chosen vocation is though. Why do you feel like that’s not enough? What more do you think you’re looking for?
Sure there is probably more stuff you could be doing, maybe a hobby or a secondary vocation. But the bulk of our lives is about the little things and living our ordinary lives with love.
 
Have you spoken to your priest about this?

From what I can see, you either have a skewered impression as to what God wants of you

A mental or emotional problem that needs professional attention:

Or, have not been honest as to the state of your marriage or home life.

If you haven’t discussed this with your priest, I can only ask…why??? None of the saints acted without spiritual guidance.

Don’t think I’m nosy, or are trying to get personal info which you may not want to share. Don’t feel obligated to answer me, or anyone else. But you have been given good advice! Think these questions over, yourself! And, God Bless!
 
That is a horrible way to look at the gift and magnitude of the gift of your vocation. It’s also demeaning to others who attempt to live this vocation with reverence, awe, and holiness.
 
Marriage and motherhood are your vocation. You honor good by fulfilling the duties of caring for your husband and children.

There is no upper limit to love; loving God before all else does not limit the love you show for your family.
 
I had trouble too. People would say give it up as a prayer offer it up, let’s be honest I wasn’t sure what that meant… till recently… I have taken a step to see a therapist… but I struggle with simple self care things. I’m doing a lot better but it was hard… one day recently I didn’t want to shower I didn’t want to get cleaned up… then I realized I didnt want to go back to that life. I didn’t want to do it so much that I was in misery and I said you know what I’m offering this as a prayer so I showered brushed my teeth combed my hair motioned deodorant body spray everything. It makes it easier and I gave it up. As soon as you put God in the center it will shift and you will see. Cooking for the kids okay I don’t want to cook for the 20th time or clean again so here god I’m giving this up for the souls in purgatory and you save a lot of souls that way as well.
 
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