Considering defection?

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I’m a 21 year old college student, and I’ve been told it’s understandable that I’m questioning my faith at this time of my life. It’s certainly not unheard for people my age. I’m conflicted about embracing my Catholic identity because I don’t agree with some of the Church’s doctrines that I don’t think will change any time soon. That said, I’ll never abandon Christianity - I truly cherish my relationship with God, Christ, the Holy Mother, and the Holy Spirit. I look to them on a daily basis for guidance and reassurance. I wholly appreciate the community I’ve been blessed to be a part of through my parish - the same parish my grandparents attended and extended family were baptized, confirmed, and married in. I participated in the KAIROS retreat in high school, which, at the time, really reaffirmed my Catholic faith. However, I don’t think I can continue to support an organization that condones social injustices that, in my heart of hearts, do not correspond with the teachings of Jesus Christ.

For instance, I cannot accept the Church’s stance on homosexuality. Biblical condemnations of same-sex relations are derivative of 3,000 year old Semitic customs, that are more cultural than divine. I don’t assume that Catholics hate homosexuals - I’m familiar with the “don’t hate the sinner, hate the sin,” mantra, but I refuse to categorize homosexuality, a genetic trait that cannot be selected or controlled, alongside things like murder and adultery. Sinning is a willful act. Being born a certain way is not.

Also, I cannot reconcile the Church’s exclusion of female clergy. I understand that the Twelve Apostles were all male, but that’s not a good enough argument for me to support an organization that does not allow women to express their faith to the same extent as men. Regardless of the reasoning, it’s purely and unarguably exclusive, and any group that excludes individuals from obtaining a position based on a biological, and subsequently uncontrollable, characteristic is antithetical to the inclusive nature of Christianity. Mary Magdalene may not have been an apostle, but she and the Holy Mother prove that women are just as important as men in Christian theology.

However, the mere fact that I’m on this message board asking for advice is a clear indication that I’m not entirely sure that I want to leave the Church. Is there room for change? Are there reasons for these doctrines that I’ve overlooked that might change my mind, or at least help me understand? Right now, I’m seeing more reasons to leave the Church than to stay. I don’t want to be a superficial Christian who identifies with a church simply for sentimental reasons. That’s not what faith is about.

Help?

PS - Please don’t try to change my mind on the facts of homosexuality. I respect the rights of others to have differing opinions regarding whether or not homosexuality is a natural condition, but it’s not an argument I’m willing to engage in right now.
First of all, yeah – it’s completely normal to question one’s faith. It’s almost an obligation to learn about why we believe the things we believe. We need to be open to facts and the ideas of others. So I encourage you on your journey of faith; it’s something that lasts a life time.

The Catholic Church has been around for nearly 2,000 years. In that time she’s had not a few wise teachers. Doctors of the Church who have struggled with as basic a teaching as the Immaculte Conception (St.Thomas Aquinas). Saints who have struggled with God’s will, sometimes experiencing dryness and a lack of God’s presence. We today, trying to keep our faith while society seems to be moving a very different direction.

The thing is, Jesus—the Christ you and I both believe in—is God almighty and knew of the struggles we’d all have. And for this reason he left us a strong foundation, His Church, built on the Rock of St. Peter. This Church would never end; it would last until the end of time. “The gates of hell” will never prevail against Christ’s Church (Matthew 16:18). It was to be the “Pillar of truth” (1 Timothy 3:15). God gave us a church to teach the truth. She is our guide. Her teachings are unwavering and consistent—a testimony to the Holy Spirit’s guidance.

Homosexuality is a major issue. It involves heated debate and strong emotions; it involves friends and family members. Homosexuality is most definitely not chosen; the Catholic Church recognizes this. On the scientific side, the issue seems to be whether its truly innate (that is, on the genetic level), or if there are developmental factors, or if both areas are involved. Whatever the source of this condition, it is truly a cross for those who endure it. They find themselves being different in a very key way. They need support and friendship like everyone else.

We must not compromise God’s plan for the human person, however. God loves every single person. Every human, heterosexual or homosexual, is made in God’s image.

It seems that out of all the teachings of (Catholic) Christianity, the teaching on the human person (what he/she is, his/her purpose, etc.) would be most central. To err on this is to err on a most fundamental aspect of Christianity. After all, God made Man male and female. For what purpose? He didn’t have to. Sexuality, then, is very key to God’s plan. The intimate union of male and female in marriage reflects God’s very love within the Holy Trinity. Just as the Holy Spirit can be described as the very love between the eternal Father and Son, so the union between the two persons expresses love and can result in new life.

The Catholic Church treats the issue of homosexuality very delicately, at least in her official documents. But she also takes very seriously the human person. For this, I reccommend Blessed John Paul II’s Theology of the Body.
 
I’m a 21 year old college student, and I’ve been told it’s understandable that I’m questioning my faith at this time of my life. It’s certainly not unheard for people my age. I’m conflicted about embracing my Catholic identity because I don’t agree with some of the Church’s doctrines that I don’t think will change any time soon. That said, I’ll never abandon Christianity - I truly cherish my relationship with God, Christ, the Holy Mother, and the Holy Spirit. I look to them on a daily basis for guidance and reassurance. I wholly appreciate the community I’ve been blessed to be a part of through my parish - the same parish my grandparents attended and extended family were baptized, confirmed, and married in. I participated in the KAIROS retreat in high school, which, at the time, really reaffirmed my Catholic faith. However, I don’t think I can continue to support an organization that condones social injustices that, in my heart of hearts, do not correspond with the teachings of Jesus Christ.

For instance, I cannot accept the Church’s stance on homosexuality. Biblical condemnations of same-sex relations are derivative of 3,000 year old Semitic customs, that are more cultural than divine. I don’t assume that Catholics hate homosexuals - I’m familiar with the “don’t hate the sinner, hate the sin,” mantra, but I refuse to categorize homosexuality, a genetic trait that cannot be selected or controlled, alongside things like murder and adultery. Sinning is a willful act. Being born a certain way is not.

Also, I cannot reconcile the Church’s exclusion of female clergy. I understand that the Twelve Apostles were all male, but that’s not a good enough argument for me to support an organization that does not allow women to express their faith to the same extent as men. Regardless of the reasoning, it’s purely and unarguably exclusive, and any group that excludes individuals from obtaining a position based on a biological, and subsequently uncontrollable, characteristic is antithetical to the inclusive nature of Christianity. Mary Magdalene may not have been an apostle, but she and the Holy Mother prove that women are just as important as men in Christian theology.

However, the mere fact that I’m on this message board asking for advice is a clear indication that I’m not entirely sure that I want to leave the Church. Is there room for change? Are there reasons for these doctrines that I’ve overlooked that might change my mind, or at least help me understand? Right now, I’m seeing more reasons to leave the Church than to stay. I don’t want to be a superficial Christian who identifies with a church simply for sentimental reasons. That’s not what faith is about.

Help?

PS - Please don’t try to change my mind on the facts of homosexuality. I respect the rights of others to have differing opinions regarding whether or not homosexuality is a natural condition, but it’s not an argument I’m willing to engage in right now.
Dear Brother, this is a wonderous time in your life. As you progess through college and education you are going to be exposed to many things either for the first time or from a closer view. You you will be meeting people from all walks of life with many different beliefs and ethical standings on right and wrong. Many will be quote " good People" and those “good people” will contain those that fall into area of personnal lifestly and beliefs that are contrary to church teaching.
Alot of it may be on things that you already had questions about.
Women hold a different role with in Gods plan then Men. that is not to say that in any way it is less important or less worthy just different. Christ was male, he choose men to be the apostles, they choose men to be the Bishops etc… that is the role for men in the church We emulate what Christ was/is. Women hold to a different role. Just as you pointed out Mary magdelene was a prominent person amoung the disiples, but seh was not an apostle.
As to those with SSA no one know why they have this. And anyone that says differently is lieing. As to if it is a choice I do think to an extent it is because the person does choose to act upon these feelings or not. Christ clear states that marriage is between man and woman and throughout Scripture it is shown that sex out side of marriage is a sin therefore sex between 2 men or two women would fall into sin as it is outside of marriage. no matter the fact that there are those today that choose to redefine what marriage is.

you stated you ahve a devotion to our Blessed Mother. Ask her to lead you in this Journey. When doubts and confusion come to you say these prays

MEMORARE: Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary that never was it known that anyone who fled to Your protection, implored Your help, or sought Your intercession was left unaided. Inspired with this confidence, we fly to you, O Virgin of virgins, our Mother. To You we come; before You we stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not our petitions, but in Your mercy, hear and answer us. Amen.

The Our Father and the Glory Be. and
The Fatima Prayer

O my Jesus
Forgive us ours sins,
save us from the fires of Hell, lead all souls to Heaven, especially those most in need of thy mercy.

I find these all to be great help and comfort when doubts and troubles come to me.
 
You have disagreements with the teachings of the Church, but it is inconsistent and intellectually dishonest of you to not also be skeptical of your dissenting views. Why cannot you be wrong? If you have a sound argument for, say, moral acceptance of homosexual acts, let us hear it. I think you will find, though, that such an argument could only proceed from postmodern views of morality and sexuality. Why should any Christian accept such an argument? If you have a sound argument from an orthodox point of view, I will join you without a moment’s hesitation because my allegiance is to Christ. He is all that matters, right? Again, though, I think you will find that your dissenting views have more to do with post-modernism than a love of Christ.

Rather than address your views directly, I want to provide for you an intellectual framework in which you can understand your dilemma more clearly. The assent of faith is trusting in what God has revealed because he has revealed it. It is on his authority that we trust the content of Revelation rather than on our own understanding. This is an important distinction that must be unpacked. Many make the mistake of accepting only those things in Catholic teaching that are amenable to their sensibility and understanding. This places our preferences ahead of God’s authority and will for us - in effect, we have made ourselves the founders of a new religion. We pick and choose what we follow in this new religion. Rather than following Christ, we are following ourselves. And that should be an important point for you to consider. Why bother with any religion at all if we merely seek affirmation of our beliefs and not a challenge of them?

Like you, I had disagreements with many of the Church’s teachings, but once I worked out the above reasoning, my dissent was exposed for the prideful and self-centered point of view that it was all along. I decided that what really mattered was not my preferences, but the Truth. If it is the teaching of Christ that homosexual acts are sinful, then I must assent to that truth. There are rational arguments for that teaching, but, as I said, the assent of faith is trusting in what God has revealed because he has revealed it, and it does not depend on any rational argument. That is the mistake I discussed earlier.

May I suggest to that you take what I have written and deeply think about it.

That being the case, we really do not believe in what God has revealed or that he has revealed it.
 
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