Constant Struggle of Faith

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HeistheBreadofLife

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I’m struggling very strongly with my faith. I love it but I keep getting tempted to leave it for a life of sin but I know I can’t and I don’t want to live without it. I love Christ, the Eucharist, and the Moral Values. The one thing I have a hard time accepting is that homosexuality is intrinsically disordered. It is not that I don’t believe but rather I don’t want to. I am bisexual. A life without Christ sounds like absolute torture. I also have been going through a dry period of faith since last September or October. The weirdest thing is that I am yelled to deny my faith over this issue even though I feel like I would be happiest as a Catholic husband to a woman with many children (or I say that now when I have none and am just 16). What is your guidance for getting past doubt and the deceitful whisper of Satan in your ear that you know morality better than God? I also feel hated because people make fun of me at school for being reserved and mock me for coming out. I struggle to see myself ever being a decent Catholic man. I could never be patient, perseverent, and selfless. I could never stop objectifying men and women, leaving the God I love, or being an overall dissapointment. Please help me and pray for me. God bless you.
 
I do not have any specific words of wisdom for you… but look up Sister Miriam James on youtube and watch her talks. She is young and relatable and went through a lot in her life. Or listen to the podcast Abiding Together (its free on your phone or spotify, etc) that she does with some other people. Does not yet talk specifically on your question, but I found it to be the most relatable and useful resource for everyday battles within yourself. Youtube videos from Joyce Meyer are also good if you need a good real talk smack down about battles going on within you.
 
See a priest. This forum is not the place to discuss such matters, you being a minor. God bless!
 
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