Convalidation counseling with kids

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Okmom89

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Hello to all reading this. I am not much of a poster due to a busy schedule lately, so please forgive me for any errors I make. 🙂
I am reverting back to Catholicism after a few years of being anti Catholic and a Sola Scriptura kind of girl (I learned the truth though!). My so far still Protestant husband is more than willing to go through convalidation with me as he also slowly explores my Faith. My problem is we live 700 miles away from family as of recently and don’t know anyone near here well enough to babysit our two kids. We’re supposed to do the counseling through a couple at my new Parish and the Msgr told me they should be fine with the kids being present. I can put headphones on our 5 year old with some games on the tablet, but I’m nervous about our active 13 month old. I don’t think he’ll allow for much conversation. I don’t feel comfortable just leaving my kids with anyone. A family friend years ago had a child die because the well known babysitter did something awful. It’s always stuck with me and I’m so terrified to get a babysitter much less someone I don’t really know at all. This convalidation is so important to me, but I feel stuck on how to handle going to the counseling. My mom said it may not be too many sessions as my husband and I already do NFP, don’t believe in birth control, have a strong stable Christian marriage and home, and he’s open to raising our kids Catholic. He even wants to learn about Catholicism and is letting me read him parts of Steven Ray’s books.
What would y’all do in this situation about the kids though? Should I bring them and hope for the best or wait to find a babysitter I feel comfortable with (which means living longer in mortal sin).
Thanks for reading my super long and winded post!😊
 
As someone who leaves their kids with babysitters all the time out of necessity, I would say learn to get comfortable with some local sitters. Get recommendations from friends. It’s just a few hours for a few sessions. You can even make a date out of it!
 
Okmom89 said:
What would y’all do in this situation about the kids though? Should I bring them and hope for the best or wait to find a babysitter I feel comfortable with (which means living longer in mortal sin).
Thanks for reading my super long and winded post!😊
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Can you meet somewhere (one house or the other) where you could hire a babysitter (young teen) to watch the youngest in a separate room so that you could regularly (every 10 - 15 min) take a pause and peek in without having to actively get up and chase the 13mth old around?
 
CradleJourney said:
Can you meet somewhere (one house or the other) where you could hire a babysitter (young teen) to watch the youngest in a separate room so that you could regularly (every 10 - 15 min) take a pause and peek in without having to actively get up and chase the 13mth old around?
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This is what I did!! I hired a high school girl, recommended by my neighbor, to watch my very active toddler while I attended a class. She actually stayed in the same room, but chased my toddler. I don’t see why you couldn’t have the babysitter meet you at the church and watch your children either in the same room or in one near by.
 
If you can’t find a baby sitter, bring your kids.

If it’s just you and the couple doing the counseling, it should be totally fine. If you are not meeting at the parish, offer meeting at in your home.

If you are meeting at your parish, then everything should be OK. Children are a MAJOR part of the Catholic understanding of marriage anyway, so there should be no reason to worry.

(Esp. if Monsignor says it should be fine)

God Bless!
 
I liked Phil19034’s advice. I never had anyone but my mom watch my kids. She did used to have people babysit my sister and me until something happened. She regretted that and instilled in me that you watch over your own kids, if they cant go with you, then you probably should not go either. I wish you success in your coming back to the church and with your husband.
 
Bring the kids and a portable playpen with some new, engaging toys for the baby. If they are close by each other and you and Dad are within eyesight, it should be ok for a couple of hours. Maybe the follow up can be with a conference call?
 
I would explain the situation and ask if the couple could come to my house, at least for some of the times. If the kids have a reliable bedtime, try doing it after that. If not, being in your own babyproofed home should allow you to be able to talk as needed. Let the 5yo play in another area of the house, and just sit on the floor in the living room and let the toddler climb around you, while you talk. Maybe offer to make them dinner?
 
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