Cussing coach

[susie_g]

Our boys’ football coach has quite a mouth.:tsktsk: What to do, what to do. They are 9 and 10, and he’s an otherwise really great coach. He has high expectations for them, but is always very positive when they don’t perform. He treats them like his own kids, and we’ve always liked him quite a lot; even going out of our way to get our kids on his teams. I’ve noticed before that he says things like, “You played a huva game" or "a d good game” things like that, and although I don’t love it for this age, I’ve overlooked it because of all his other good qualities.

My question is, where should I draw the line, and if he crosses it, what should I do? Recently he said, “I swear to God…”, and tonight it was “bulls***.” It’s always nice and clear for all the boys and their parents to hear. Honestly, I wouln’t let my kids watch a movie that had this kind of language in it, and I hate to think of what it might do that this is someone they are encouraged to admire and respect. I don’t know if this is common for him during practice, and am hesitant to ask the boys for fear of drawing their attention to it. They are homeschooled, and don’t have as much exposure to profanity as some other kids might.

Their last game is on Saturday, so this may soon become a non-issue, but we’d like for them to continue on his teams in the future. What would you do? Am I making a big deal about nothing, or should I do something about this? I haven’t informed dh about these last two “infractions” because he’s at work right now. I’m not sure what he’ll say.

 

[Kristina_P]

susie g.:

Our boys’ football coach has quite a mouth.:tsktsk: What to do, what to do. They are 9 and 10, and he’s an otherwise really great coach. He has high expectations for them, but is always very positive when they don’t perform. He treats them like his own kids, and we’ve always liked him quite a lot; even going out of our way to get our kids on his teams. I’ve noticed before that he says things like, “You played a huva game" or "a d good game” things like that, and although I don’t love it for this age, I’ve overlooked it because of all his other good qualities.

My question is, where should I draw the line, and if he crosses it, what should I do? Recently he said, “I swear to God…”, and tonight it was “bulls***.” It’s always nice and clear for all the boys and their parents to hear. Honestly, I wouln’t let my kids watch a movie that had this kind of language in it, and I hate to think of what it might do that this is someone they are encouraged to admire and respect. I don’t know if this is common for him during practice, and am hesitant to ask the boys for fear of drawing their attention to it. They are homeschooled, and don’t have as much exposure to profanity as some other kids might.

Their last game is on Saturday, so this may soon become a non-issue, but we’d like for them to continue on his teams in the future. What would you do? Am I making a big deal about nothing, or should I do something about this? I haven’t informed dh about these last two “infractions” because he’s at work right now. I’m not sure what he’ll say.

I’d suggest that you just talk to the coach about it. Make sure to let him know how much you value the good influence he’s been and the great coach he’s been. Don’t be confrontational about it. Chances are that he’s so used to cursing that he doesn’t notice it anymore.

 

[pira114]

I agree with the above response. Most of the time, a nice friendly, non-confrontational talk will resolve or at least help the issue.

I know what it’s like to have a bad mouth. Foul language has been a part of my life for so long, I can’t stop. Where I work, not one sentence goes by without a foul word. Even from women. I use it so much, I didn’t realize I was doing it in front of my kids. The one think I learned was that if you don’t make a big deal about it, they usually don’t make a point of saying it. When my first son started to ask what they meant, I explained that they are a way of expressing yourself that should not be used in most cases. He seemed to understand this and has never had to be told not to cuss in front of women, in school, Church, at Grandma’s, etc… Once in a while, he’ll say a “hell” or “****” when we are alone together working on the car or hunting. It’s his way of bonding with me and being “one of the guys.”

No matter what you do, they’ll hear and use these words. You just have to try to minimize it. We’ve also started giving him one dollar for everytime he catches me using bad words. It’s helped me remember to try not to use them, and sometimes he saves up quite a bit of money!

 

[Daniel_Marsh]

I once had a cursing baseball coach and I simply left a blank cassette tape on the bench after the game. He would walk around picking up the area. I guess he wondered if someone was recording the game, his speech. His cursing stopped.