C
clerrtheberr
Guest
Hello, I’m not really used to using forums, but there’s been something eating at me and I am looking for any and all the advice i can get. I wasn’t sure which category to post this under, but i figured it was related. So anyways, here it goes. (I apologize for the lengthiness of this)
I’m a junior, and my boyfriend is a senior. That means that he’ll be leaving for college soon and i wont get to see him as much next year. (the school he wants to go to will be about two hours away) We have been dating for almost a year now, and in that time I’ve become sort dependent on him (very dependent, actually). Although i have not gone to a doctor to be diagnosed for anything, i believe i have been depressed. Even though for as long as i can remember I’ve felt dull, or empty, or worn out, it’s been especially bad this year. I think contributors have been a loss that i have been mourning for a couple months now and also extreme stress from things like school. But despite the countless hours I’ve cried, my boyfriend has put up with me. He has comforted me and stuck by my side when others have drifted away. His hugs help me to drag through the day. I have prayed and prayed for the strength to push through each day. I suppose my prayers are being answered since i am still here, however it still hurts. And i cant help but think that we were meant have each other at this time in our lives.
Getting around to the topic mentioned in the title, my boyfriend is a Protestant. He’s sweet, and good to me, and although we are young we love each other. We are there for each other as friends and as family. But despite how much we may care for one another, I can’t help but have my fears. We’ve talked about his going away and he wants to make the distance work (calling/skyping/visiting on the weekends). If we stay together and overcome that obstacle, what would it be for? Isn’t the purpose of dating to ultimately find the person who you’ll marry? If we do get married, well, there’s the religion thing. I come from a large, all-Catholic family on both my mother’s and my father’s side. My boyfriend, on the other hand… well… i don’t know. He says he doesn’t know what denomination to classify himself as, but I’m pretty sure that the church his family goes to (at least for Christmas) is called free methodist. He doesn’t attend services on sundays but he does go to a youth group and another church. I don’t know how often his mom goes, but she seems to take high interest in her religion. I don’t think his dad is very religious. I know they like me and always invite me to family stuff, but I can’t help but fear that they like me but not the catholic.
My boyfriend seems to find some of the traditions and teachings of the Church unnecessary or wrong. We disagree on the topic of gay marriage, but have agreed that we should save sex for marriage. I think he also sees the standing/sitting/kneeling at mass as tedious or cumbersome. Although he has admitted to me that any preconceived notions he had about Catholics could very well be wrong since he didn’t really have any first-hand knowledge. In fact, he hadn’t even heard the word “sacrament” before he met me. I remember when he was suggesting that we make chicken finger pizza a Friday routine. I was slightly nervous to explain to him that I had given up pizza for lent, and even if I hadn’t that we still don’t eat meat on Fridays. I guess I was afraid that he would think that it was unnecessary and dumb, but it turned out ok. There was another time at their family Christmas gathering when the topic of Easter came up and it took them all a while to come to Good Friday as the day of Christ’s death. They also struggled to describe the primary differences between Jews and Christians.
They’re a nice family, and at least they have faith to begin with, but there have been tiny comments that I just can’t ignore that make me think that they don’t really like Catholics. My boyfriend assured me that they have nothing against me or Catholics, so I guess I’ll trust him on that. After all, he’s still dating me and they still invite me to things. Maybe I’m just overthinking things, but who could blame me with all the heat that the Church has been taking lately.
I know we’re still young, but I had always dreamed of /expected to have a perfect wedding in my Catholic parish that my parents were married in. The possibility that I would one day be dating a protestant had never occurred to me. I love my Catholic faith, and I know it is my obligation to raise my family in the church, and I want to. I also know that I can’t force him to convert. I’ve heard both good and bad stories about catholic/non-Catholic marriages. I guess I’m just afraid of what the future holds. I think I’m also afraid that despite 10 years of catholic schooling and three years of Sunday confirmation classes, I’m not well enough prepared to defend my faith (I’m afraid of arguments). I’m also afraid that I won’t provide a good enough example of Catholics by my words and actions.
So if you’ve read this far, thank you. Any advice, (name removed by moderator)ut and/or prayers are greatly appreciated. Also, I would like to know if anyone knows of good resources or good reads that would help to explain the Catholic faith to other people. Any suggestions to help me educate myself would be great too. Thomas Aquinas is already on my to-read list. Again, thank you and God bless.
I’m a junior, and my boyfriend is a senior. That means that he’ll be leaving for college soon and i wont get to see him as much next year. (the school he wants to go to will be about two hours away) We have been dating for almost a year now, and in that time I’ve become sort dependent on him (very dependent, actually). Although i have not gone to a doctor to be diagnosed for anything, i believe i have been depressed. Even though for as long as i can remember I’ve felt dull, or empty, or worn out, it’s been especially bad this year. I think contributors have been a loss that i have been mourning for a couple months now and also extreme stress from things like school. But despite the countless hours I’ve cried, my boyfriend has put up with me. He has comforted me and stuck by my side when others have drifted away. His hugs help me to drag through the day. I have prayed and prayed for the strength to push through each day. I suppose my prayers are being answered since i am still here, however it still hurts. And i cant help but think that we were meant have each other at this time in our lives.
Getting around to the topic mentioned in the title, my boyfriend is a Protestant. He’s sweet, and good to me, and although we are young we love each other. We are there for each other as friends and as family. But despite how much we may care for one another, I can’t help but have my fears. We’ve talked about his going away and he wants to make the distance work (calling/skyping/visiting on the weekends). If we stay together and overcome that obstacle, what would it be for? Isn’t the purpose of dating to ultimately find the person who you’ll marry? If we do get married, well, there’s the religion thing. I come from a large, all-Catholic family on both my mother’s and my father’s side. My boyfriend, on the other hand… well… i don’t know. He says he doesn’t know what denomination to classify himself as, but I’m pretty sure that the church his family goes to (at least for Christmas) is called free methodist. He doesn’t attend services on sundays but he does go to a youth group and another church. I don’t know how often his mom goes, but she seems to take high interest in her religion. I don’t think his dad is very religious. I know they like me and always invite me to family stuff, but I can’t help but fear that they like me but not the catholic.
My boyfriend seems to find some of the traditions and teachings of the Church unnecessary or wrong. We disagree on the topic of gay marriage, but have agreed that we should save sex for marriage. I think he also sees the standing/sitting/kneeling at mass as tedious or cumbersome. Although he has admitted to me that any preconceived notions he had about Catholics could very well be wrong since he didn’t really have any first-hand knowledge. In fact, he hadn’t even heard the word “sacrament” before he met me. I remember when he was suggesting that we make chicken finger pizza a Friday routine. I was slightly nervous to explain to him that I had given up pizza for lent, and even if I hadn’t that we still don’t eat meat on Fridays. I guess I was afraid that he would think that it was unnecessary and dumb, but it turned out ok. There was another time at their family Christmas gathering when the topic of Easter came up and it took them all a while to come to Good Friday as the day of Christ’s death. They also struggled to describe the primary differences between Jews and Christians.
They’re a nice family, and at least they have faith to begin with, but there have been tiny comments that I just can’t ignore that make me think that they don’t really like Catholics. My boyfriend assured me that they have nothing against me or Catholics, so I guess I’ll trust him on that. After all, he’s still dating me and they still invite me to things. Maybe I’m just overthinking things, but who could blame me with all the heat that the Church has been taking lately.
I know we’re still young, but I had always dreamed of /expected to have a perfect wedding in my Catholic parish that my parents were married in. The possibility that I would one day be dating a protestant had never occurred to me. I love my Catholic faith, and I know it is my obligation to raise my family in the church, and I want to. I also know that I can’t force him to convert. I’ve heard both good and bad stories about catholic/non-Catholic marriages. I guess I’m just afraid of what the future holds. I think I’m also afraid that despite 10 years of catholic schooling and three years of Sunday confirmation classes, I’m not well enough prepared to defend my faith (I’m afraid of arguments). I’m also afraid that I won’t provide a good enough example of Catholics by my words and actions.
So if you’ve read this far, thank you. Any advice, (name removed by moderator)ut and/or prayers are greatly appreciated. Also, I would like to know if anyone knows of good resources or good reads that would help to explain the Catholic faith to other people. Any suggestions to help me educate myself would be great too. Thomas Aquinas is already on my to-read list. Again, thank you and God bless.
Our marriage has definitely been enhanced by our shared faith. It’s also worth mentioning that my parents’ marriage has benefitted from my Dad’s rediscovery of his faith and their increased spiritual unity.